My Hero
by Jordyn2011
Summary: Edward is a twenty-three year old in the Air Force, who fell in love with a young, sixteen year old Bella, who is back home in Alabama. When he comes home on leave, will their love blossom, or will all the prying eyes keep them from what they love most?
1. Chapter 1

**Diclaimer: I may own three beautiful horses, but I don't own Twilight. =(**

**A/N: Guys; this just came to me, and I'm really excited about it, so please leave me feedback. If you do...you'll get an extra teaser-type deal; basically i'll let you in on what's coming up for the second chapter! Thanks soo much guys!**

* * *

It was innocence. It was desire. It was necessary.

Bella walked down the stairs to the basement bedroom where Edward was waiting.

He had been gone for almost six months to Texas for basic training. Ever since he had joined the Air Force, Bella had been more and more aware of how gone he was.

They had never been close before; the age difference had been too great to do much bonding. Edward being twenty-two, Bella being a young, innocent sixteen, the only place they had ever talked was at the church they mutually attended. She was friends with both of his younger brothers, and so they talked occasionally, bonding a bit over his fear of bee's and how he had nerdy stalkers at college.

The door didn't squeak-that was one thing his father had repaired before the move. Bella had come to see him at his family's new house, they had recently moved to a farm close to her family's own. Edward was on leave from the Air Force to help his family move into the new farm house.

The summer air was hot, even in the stairwell leading down to Edward's basement. She slid her hand down the wall as she carefully descended the stairs; she saw Edward bent on one knee stacking CDs in a CD tower with his back turned to her. She stopped; she didn't want him to see her before she had a chance to take him all in.

They had slowly started corresponding through letters; she had been directed to write him and tell him how proud she was that she knew someone serving our country, by her very own mother. To her surprise, he had written her back, spilling his heart out to her about how lonely he was, how all the other young men had girls to write to back home, and would she be interested in writing back and forth with him, it may make things a little less lonely if he had something to look forward to.

He mentioned how he loved how her letters smelled so feminine, that was something he deeply missed, the way girls smelled, the only girls out here just showered with basic soap and didn't bother to put on anything that smelled half decent. She had made him laugh when she told him she would leave kisses on the outside of his envelopes so his friends would beg to know who his secret lady was, and they did when they saw the red lip prints on the outside of his letters.

His mother was supportive of them getting to know each other and even helped set up Skype "dates" for them to officially see each other while he was gone, that was how he had asked her out. He had been so good to her, sending her to her junior prom with her best friend Jacob. He only wanted her to be happy, telling her repeatedly that if it ever got to be too much she could end it. Like she would ever end it, she was already so deeply into this relationship, and she hadn't even held her own boyfriend's hand.

His gray Underarmour tee-shirt stretched across new muscles that she had yet to see, where they crossed between his shoulders. She loved the way you could see a sliver of skin where his shirt didn't quite meet his black mesh shorts. She was so tempted to just run down the rest of the stairs and jump on his back and cover him with kisses and everything else she could think of.

As she stepped down onto the next step it groaned and she tripped, all she could see was the hard concrete floor and she was cursing in her mind that she would never get to hold her hero, which was until she felt warm arms gather her up before her head hit the ground.

"Bella, this certainly isn't the most convenient way to meet you as my girlfriend for the first time…In public?"

He said the last part as a question and she laughed, and then blushed beet red when she realized how close he was to her. He stood her back upright, making sure she was steady on her feet, before he let his hands leave her waist, but even then his right hand lingered on her left elbow. His dark brown eyes looked into hers and she felt a rush to her head, things about this man…they made her so clumsy.

"Edward…I've thought about how I would say this, how smooth I would be, and all the things I could do to you to surprise you…to make you love me."

"Love you…oh baby, how could I not love you? You're my everything, my one reason to continue with training, just so I can come back to the barracks and write to you, or reread your letters, smell your sweet perfume, press my lips to the envelopes when none of the guys are looking, just to feel like I'm kissing you."

Bella teared up at the sound of his sweetness. His arms wrapped around her and then he kissed her sweetly on the forehead.

"So do you like it? I know it's a little different since Peter and Charlotte lived here, but we've just finished the basement so I would have my own room, and the boys can come hang out down here and use it when I leave. Other than that it's all the same…I hope you like it."

"I do like it! And it's not near as sad as I thought it would be, having Peter and Char sell the farm to yall. But now since they moved in next door to us, I get to see the kids so much more and that's what I love the most."

"Oh yeah, how are the kids? I haven't seen any of them except Garret since we started moving in. Peter brought him over when they gave us the keys. The girls, Jane and Chelsea, and the youngest…Kate, right? How are they?"

"Aw, the girls, they love the new yard to play in. Kate is still too little to appreciate that stuff, but I'm sure she'll love it. And they even have an extra bedroom now, although…if Peter doesn't find some work soon…well let's not think about that."

Edward touched her face with one of his hands, gently stroking her jawbone.

"I've wanted to touch you for so long. But you do know that…this shouldn't be happening right? I'm still too old for you. I mean, I looked it all up, the age of consent is sixteen in Alabama, but that's only if the other person in question is twenty. But see, I'm twenty two…meaning the age of consent is eighteen. I can't do anything besides love you until you get that old."

Bella studied Edward's lips as he told her this.

"Nothing but love me? I think not…I haven't waited six months and had to satisfy myself just to find out that I can't be with you. No one has to know anything honey. I need you to do more than just love me…"

"Let's bide our time and see what happens. We'll get to spend a lot of time together before I head back. I have a whole month before we have to decide anything."

She had just three days until she turned seventeen. There was no way she was waiting three hundred, sixty-eight days to do things with her love that would make her mother blush. The summer heat could convince him she hoped.

Edward looked at her surveying the apartment still; there was a large bed in one corner, a deep blue bedspread over it. Plain fluorescent lights hung from the ceiling, it had been a basement/garage before he moved in after all. His dresser stood on the wall in between two doors, one being his closet, the other his bathroom. On the other side of the stairs there was a sitting area, with a wall full of DVD's and a rather large plasma screen television mounted in front of a comfy looking black sofa. Another large chair graced the other wall, and that made up his very own apartment, lounge area.

"It's nice Edward; I really love what you've done with it.

"You're just saying that. You're my girlfriend; you have to be nice."

Bella laughed, Edward shook his head and then looked toward the stairs as his brother Jasper came down, followed by his girlfriend, Victoria.

"Bella, I've missed you!"

"Tori, I know it's been forever. You've been working so you haven't been at church. Has Jazz not done a good job of supporting you?"

Jasper snorted as the girls giggled together, laughing at how he couldn't manage to hold down a job.

"So, Esme says you're staying the night with us, how'd she manage to talk Charlie and Renee' into that one?"

"I'm not really sure, I think she pretty much convinced them that nothing would be going on and that you and I would be pretty safe in the living room together."

"Well, I have a surprise for you…Emmett has gone over to Alec's house and Carlisle has to go out on the road tonight…Esme decided to join him meaning…."

"It's just us four?" Edward sounded almost upset, his voice getting high as he asked his question.

"Yup, I thought that would excite you bro, you haven't seen your girl in six months, not ever as your official girlfriend. I thought you'd jump at the chance to be alone with her."

"Jasper, I need to have a private conversation with you. Excuse us, girls."

Jasper was pulled roughly to the bedroom half of the basement.

"How could you do this?"

"What do you mean; I seriously thought it would be a good thing. I know I want to spend any time I can with Tori, and I see her everyday anyway. I don't understand why this is such a big deal to you. Are you two already having problems?"

"I just realized how young she is…that's all. And I also realized how much trouble I can be in if someone thinks badly of us. I can get dishonorably discharged Jasper!"

"Calm down. One night isn't going to change anything. You know you want to screw her, so just let go. You'll be back in a month and you'll only see her two more times before she's eighteen. Make the most of tonight bro. And if it's not just about screwing her, then just hang with her tonight, make it completely innocent, although we both know, Bella isn't the most innocent girl out there."

Edward punched Jasper's arm, "That's my girl you're talking about! She is an angel by the way…my angel."

Jazz smiled at him and the tension and anger dissipated between all of them. The thought that he would only see her twice more before she was eighteen really brought him back down to earth. He would enjoy this, he had to.

* * *

"Movie time!" Tori's loud voice echoed over the entire house, and roused Edward and Bella from where they were deeply buried in a discussion about music.

Tori and Jasper pounded down the stairs and settled onto the big chair as Bella made herself comfortable on the couch.

"What are you guys in the mood for?" Edward asked politely.

"Mmm, nothing too scary, how about…the Notebook?" Tori's girly request was totally her.

The boys groaned and Bella decided to help them out.

"How about Transformers. Just enough action and a little love?"

Edward smiled and slid the DVD into the slot. As he pulled her into his lap he moved close to her ear and whispered, "Thanks Bell, that's my girl."

Bella snuggled down into Edward's chest and she felt his heart beating against her cheek.

"This is where I am, always right?" Bella whispered up towards Edward's ear.

"Shhh, baby Bella. That's where you'll always be."

Bella looked over to where Tori and Jasper were nestled in the chair, deeply asleep. Her forehead was fitted perfectly into where Jazz's neck was. It was so adorable, and she nudged Edward with the crown of her head and pointed in their direction. He grinned and said, "Honey, why don't you wake them up. It's after one in the morning; they might as well head upstairs."

Bella nodded and climbed out of his lap and walked over to where they lay curled up in the large chair.

"Tori, Jazz, why don't you guys take it upstairs?"

Jazz didn't wake Tori up, he just opened his eyes quickly and then proceeded to gather Tori in his arms and expertly carry her up the steep stairs. Edward followed him up the stairs, making sure he didn't fall or drop Tori and then he shut the door for him, finally allowing Bella and himself to have real alone time for the first time since he had first seen her that day.

He walked back down the stairs and looked at a sleeping Bella on the couch where he had left her, just minutes before. He didn't want her to sleep on the couch when his bed was so close, she might have a crick in her neck when she woke up, and he couldn't have that, so he gently went to her and attempted to move her without waking her. But his phone vibrated against her in his pocket as he picked her up and she moved and their heads bumped.

"Mother-effer, what was that for Edward!?"

"I didn't mean to honey, are you okay?" he said with concern flowing with his voice.

"I'm fine, you just scared me, and I don't normally wake up to being banged in the head."

"That's what she said! And also, I could probably arrange that if you like."

"Edward, there is no way that you are twenty three. Just no way. You act like you are about sixteen, like seriously. But I love you anyway. And no, if you ever wake me up like that, let's just say…the repercussions will be intense."

"God, you make the repercussion's sound like something I want more than waking you up being banged."

"Edward, you basically make me sick." But Bella said it while she was laughing hysterically while she was telling him this stuff.

He picked her up again but she threw her weight to the side and Edward had to stand her back up.

"What's up with that baby?"

"I want you to check your phone. Who is texting you at one thirty in the morning anyway?"

Edward reached into his pocket, having already forgotten what caused the head bump anyway. One new message flashed across the screen and he clicked the button under read and almost automatically he uttered "shit" under his breath.

"What is it honey?"

"It's Esme; she's asking if we're doing anything that she would be ashamed of. What kind of mom asks those kinds of questions?"

Bella looked at him with lust in her eyes. "Edward…you know we aren't going to do anything that neither of us agree on. But really, we can't wait until next time we see each other. What if there never is another next time. Take full advantage of the situation. I'm practically on my knees begging Edward."

Edward looked pained as he tried to say the words that she needed to hear. "Honey, it's not that I don't want you. I plan on taking full advantage of this situation when I feel the time is right. But tonight isn't it. We haven't even had time to properly date or anything. As far as I'm concerned, today was our first "real" day together as a couple. Please baby, don't ask me to do something that would hurt us both, I know you think you want this…but would it help if I said I wasn't ready?"

"You not ready? Now you just make me laugh Edward."

"It isn't funny. I've been gone for six months. I haven't hooked up. As if there is anyone in the state of Texas I would hook up with…"

Bella was slightly irritated, but she soothed him with a chaste kiss on his forehead. He took advantage of the fact that she was on her tiptoes and he grabbed her by her waste and slung her over his shoulder.

"Ugh, Edward you are such a pig! Put me down now….please?"

He just laughed and threw her down on his bed.

"Now this is more like it!"

"Baby girl, you know I would lay you down if I was going to be doing anything to you. Now be a good girl and wait here while I go change clothes and find you something to wear."

Bella curled into his bed, holding a pillow in her arms. The light in the closet was on and then the light turned on as he darted, half clothed to the bathroom. From the bathroom flew a yellow Nike tee-shirt and a pair of black sweat pants. She decided to tease Edward a bit and so when he emerged she was laying on his bed, on her stomach, facing away from him looking at one of his car magazines, wearing only her black boy shorts and a black sports bra.

"Baby, that just isn't fair. Please put the clothes that I tossed to you. Be good baby."

"Nope, I think I prefer to sleep like this."

"Bella, you will be the death of me. Defiantly going to kill me. But whatever you want to do. I'll sleep on the couch if you insist on sleeping that way."

That was the moment when Bella knew she had been defeated. She stood up and threw the magazine back into a box by the bed. Then she pulled the sweatpants on and the tee-shirt over her sports bra.

"Fine, are you happy now Edward? You win, so let's just go to sleep."

"Bells, you can't pout every time you don't get your way. You didn't even know you were going to get to sleep over. You're lucky Esme's so good at talking people into things. I wish we could just enjoy our first night together. If we were doing things, you wouldn't be able to enjoy this night, you're first time won't be fun and I want to be able to hold you afterwards and reassure you. Let's just have fun tonight…come on honey."

Bella's frown turned to a slight smile as Edward reached to turn the lights out. He started to slide the covers back and Bella stopped him.

"If it gets cool we'll do that, until then let's just lay here on top of them."

Edward smiled even though it was dark, and he kissed her sweetly on her lips. Then his kisses went down her jawbone, all the way down her neck. He skipped over her chest and went to where his shirt that she was wearing hit the waistband of the sweats that graced her body. Then he pulled her shirt up a bit and started kissing her gently on her stomach.

No boy had ever kissed her so close to…down there. Butterflies filled Bella's stomach as his hands gripped her hips softly. Suddenly, his hands were in the band of her sweats and they were being slid down slowly. She didn't complain and just lifted her butt to give him better access. The pants slid off easily enough and were soon in a pile on the floor, followed by his shirt, after which he proclaimed, "You were right about it getting hot in here baby."

His bare skin shocked her legs as he went between them. She was slightly nervous as thoughts passed through her head about how she may just be losing her virginity to Edward that night. A scared sixteen year old girl, an experienced twenty three year old boy…it was almost like a harlequin. Just as Edward kissed the insides of her thighs, just as she thought this was all beginning, Edward stopped abruptly.

"I don't mean to stop now honey, but I promised tonight wouldn't be it. I won't touch you tonight."

Bella accepted this, once again breathing normally. If just the thoughts had scared her, then how could she possibly be prepared for what may come in just a few days? Edward would be gone in just a month's time…she had to overcome this fear or she may never get the opportunity again.

He allowed her to curl into him, spooning with her, making her feel protected and safe. As soon as he felt her breathing ease, and heard her soft snores, he grabbed his cell phone from the table and answered Esme's question.

To: Mom

-No, mother. I already told you not tonight. We're laying down now since it's after two. Tell dad I love and miss him. I'll see you day after tomorrow.

From: E

He looked down at her for one last time that night, leaning down to breathe in the sweet scent of her strawberry shampooed hair. Her face was perfect in the darkness of the basement bedroom. A small strip of moonlight leaked through a small window and caught her dark hair, illuminating it slightly. He wanted to touch it, but then he realized that he might wake her, and he couldn't stand having to listen to Bella's begging again.

So after he took one last look at his girl, he set an alarm for his phone for late the next morning, and then he curled more into her and closed his eyes so sleep could take him.


	2. Sunlight on the River Glistening

**Disclaimer: I own a sparkly blue ipod that has my song inspirations on it, but I do not own Twilight.**

**A/N: Sorry I keep having to update all this stuff twice, i keep forgetting to put my disclaimer and notes on here. The song to accompany this is Skinny Dipping by Whitney Duncan. Go youtube her video and watch it or listen to the song while reading this, it goes together pretty well, or so I hope.**

**Please don't be afraid to leave feedback, i need it become a better writer! Thank you all sooo much!**

* * *

(EPOV)

I threw my arm in the direction of my bedside table when my phone's alarm went off right at nine o'clock. I threw my glance around the room quickly when I didn't feel Bella by my side. She wouldn't have baled on me in the middle of the night would she?

I pulled myself out of bed, listening with my specially trained ears, waiting on the slightest noise to alert me as to where she might be. My sweat pants were slung low on my hips and my shirt was still in a pile on the floor…last night had gotten too heated and we had barely done anything. I would have to talk to mom and dad and see if I could get a fan or something.

I pulled my shirt on and walked up the stairs since she apparently wasn't down there. As I shoved the door open, the smells of banana pancakes and bacon hit me directly in my sensitive nostrils. All of my training had made all of my senses somewhat…super. Oh well, I guess the Armed Forces tend to do that to a person. I heard Bella's beautiful laugh and I saw her standing by the stove flipping the pancakes with Tori.

Now I'm not sure about Bella, but if she's anything like Tori, she's got to be a killer cook. Both Em and I were super jealous of the fact that Jazz had such a talented girlfriend. Sure, she'd had a hard life, but she was a senior in high school so soon Jazz would marry her and all her nightmares would just be faint memories. They were lovely together…that was for sure.

"You want anything for breakfast? I remembered from your letters that banana pancakes were your favorite…I thought you might like them on your first official full day back."

I grinned broadly at her and started walking towards her, but of course Jazz thought it was a good idea to trip me on my way across the kitchen.

"Eff you Jasper" I whispered under my breath. He knew I was never clumsy and so it was painfully embarrassing for him to make Bella think that I was. Bella just laughed at my odd crouch position I had taken up while falling, the counter was the greatest place to fall, so I had opted for holding my hands towards the floor. In my personal opinion I figured I looked something like a wild animal about to jump on its prey, not the hottest thing to show your girlfriend first thing in the morning.

"Yes, love, I would love some of your delicious cooking." I sneered in Jasper's direction as I addressed my beautiful girl.

She dished some pancakes out for me and added a few pieces of bacon to my plate.

"Syrup's on the table." Tori added as she dished up some of the hot pancakes for Jazz.

"Are you girls not eating?"

"Oh, we already ate. I'm about to have to go home…my mom's expecting me. I mean, Rose and her husband are coming home and Alice has the day off. I think I'm expected to spend the day with my family."

"Well…okay. I mean, I thought we could do something. But I'm sure dad left me some stuff to do around here…"

"Wait! How about tonight? We could go for a picnic at sunset…down by the creek?"

"I'd love to baby girl; will your parents let you spend the night again?"

"I doubt that…but wait. Tori, are you up for some camping?"

"You know it girl!"

I kissed her cheek gently, after wiping the sweet and sticky syrup from my mouth and I watched as she climbed into her black truck and backed out of our yard. I knew she shouldn't have a problem getting home, she lived less than five minutes away, but it still plagued me that she could be hurt at any time. And any time that we were apart, when she was so close to me, just took me back to Texas where I was always alone. Even in my crowded training exercises, classes, or in the mess hall I was always alone. Sure I had guy friends that I hung with at times, but it was nothing like spooning with Bella as she breathed evenly in her sleep. And camping sounded damn good to me, but something told me Tori and Jasper's camping would be more of an inside affair…

* * *

(BPOV)

"Mom, I'm home! Where are you guys?"

"Honey, we're in the living room, how was spending the night with Tori?"

"It was so, so, so much fun Mama! We watched a movie with the boys and then we went to sleep. Then this morning, we made them breakfast. Jazz was so adorable; he got syrup all in his hair and had to shower even before Edward woke up."

"And speaking of Edward…how is he?"

"Mom, he's the best thing I've ever had in my life. I really think I might love him, as far as real love goes."

Renee' laughed like her daughters love life was just a joke, Bella knew her mother didn't want to face that she was growing up. Just like she didn't want to acknowledge the fact that her daughter was dating a twenty-three year old. She didn't really say much about it, mostly because she knew that Edward was a good, Christian guy for the most part. Sure, they were still young, and Bella knew she would mess up - she drank on occasion. But still, she was who she was, and that was all she could ever be. Edward was good for her, treated her well, and would never hurt her on purpose. Her mother knew that, and that was the reason why she tolerated their illegal relationship.

"So what's on our agenda for today? I was thinking we were having family time, that's why I told Tori, Jazz, and Edward I was coming home for a little while. Oh and mom…may I go camping with Tori by the creek tonight?"

"Well, your father and I were going to go into town to buy some pool chemicals and stuff for the barbecue tomorrow. So I thought you and Alice and Rose were just going to lie out and swim all afternoon. As long as you spend the afternoon with your sisters, I suppose it would be okay for you to camp out with Tori. Just make sure to bring water and snacks."

"Mhmm, thanks mom, I'll just go change into my bathing suit and then I'll go join the girls. I guess they're already outside?"

"Oh, you know Alice. She woke Rose up at the crack of dawn almost to go to Huddle House for breakfast and then they came back to swim and tan. She's missed being off work."

Bella ran back to her room and changed into a navy blue bandeau bikini top, with black bottoms. Stopping only by the kitchen to grab her favorite pair of black Wayfarers and a bottle of Smart Water, she was out the door and onto the back deck in no time.

"AHHHH, Bella it has been too fucking long!" Rosalie screamed as she jumped up from the lounge chair she'd been laying on.

"I know sis, how's everyone in your neck of the woods?"

"Adam is lovely, as is Dexter. You know, it's my husband and son, how could they be anything less?"

Bella laughed at her sister, she had missed her since she had moved to Birmingham with her husband and their son. Alice worked all the time, and sometimes she was a bit jealous that Bella had a lovely boyfriend that was even older than Alice herself, but altogether she was happy for her baby sister, that she had finally found such a wonderful man.

"Come get in, the water is amazing!"

Alice's shrill voice rang out as she sent a splash of water in Bella's direction, where Bella and Rose were embracing at the bottom of the stairs.

Rose held out her hand and Bella sat her Wayfarers and water down and they ran together towards the water; just girls, no drama, no tension, just sisters and water, and an endless summer just waiting to be filled with love and laughter.

* * *

(EPOV)

"Tori, these are the best pancakes I've ever had. It's not hard to say that they don't serve anything like this in the mess hall back in Texas."

Tori laughed as Jasper pulled her down into his lap. He planted small kisses to her cheek and then they led to her mouth. I tried to look away, as it was embarrassing to watch my eighteen year old brother love his girlfriend in a better way than I could show my very own. It was pretty insane that he used to actually date Bella, God I never realized how jealous of him I could be. But now I had her, and that was all that mattered.

Tori looked up at me; she had caught me staring despite my efforts to look away.

"I'm sorry Edward; I didn't realize we were being so…public. We're not exactly used to having anyone around when Esme and Carlisle are gone…"

"Don't worry about it. I'm actually just going to put these in the sink and then I'm gonna get to work on some of the stuff dad left for me."

Jasper spoke up, "Nah man, leave that list to me. I need to get off my lazy butt anyway. Lord knows I can't hold a job down, it's the least I can do."

Tori laughed nervously and took my plate before I could take it to the sink.

"Really Edward, Jazz and I can take care of the inside stuff at least. Why don't you go visit with Smokey, I'm sure you haven't been out to see him have you?"

"Ah…come to think of it I'll take you up on that offer. I haven't seen him since I left; we may go for a ride."

They both nodded at me and Tori got up to clean the kitchen as Jazz surveyed the list Carlisle had left for us to accomplish before they returned tomorrow. I walked down to my basement bedroom and headed to my closet.

Okay, so I was pretty anal retentive. My morning routine is pretty obsessive. It wasn't so bad before I left, but in the Air Force, in my elite field, there isn't any room for a slob. I stripped down and jumped into the shower, the water was scalding hot, but I enjoyed the feeling as it slid down my hard body. I shampooed and conditioned my hair, and then used my facial cleanser, yeah I may be a guy but I don't want any nasty pimples or gross hormone crap like that.

After the shower, I meticulously dried myself and I dressed in khaki cargo shorts and a gray Air Force tee-shirt. I slipped a pair of gray ankle socks on and my pair of black Nikes. My hair was a completely different story, usually I would style it carefully, in my best "I don't give a fuck" technique, but since I had to shave my head for the Air Force, I just let my short…tresses if you will, dry naturally. I walked out my own personal back door and headed to the barn, where my old gray horse, Smokey, lived.

I'd had good old Smokey since I was a junior in high school. He was a good companion and really bomb proof and I had definitely missed him while I was gone. I had the urge to go back to my room and grab my stash of smokes but I didn't, I was starting to realize what smoking was doing to my lungs, how it made it difficult to run for long periods of time or swim, which were two of the most important things in my field. I was slowly cutting back, and I would hopefully be done by Christmas.

"Hey Smokey boy, how's it going?"

The gray horse snorted and walked over to the gate so he could sniff me. I walked inside the barn long enough to grab a bridle. As I walked outside, Smokey was already waiting by the gate, knowing what I wanted from him. I slipped his head into the bridle and led him outside the gate where I jumped onto him bareback (yum, just those words make me picture Bella) and we started out down the dirt road that led past our poultry houses.

I didn't really remember where the road led to, but I knew it was no where that I couldn't get back home from, there wasn't anywhere around here that I didn't know much about, even though my parents had just recently moved here. It was my old youth group leader's farm, Peter and Charlotte had just recently moved out because of financial constraints.

As we trotted down the road and came to the highway, I noticed a house with a familiar black truck in front of it. There is no way Bella lives this close, and she has horses too. This must be some kind of sick joke or maybe a dream. I decided to test my boundaries, there was a dirt road that led behind Bella's house so I decided to take it, and surely she wouldn't be able to see me.

The road led straight to their house, where I knew I was royally fucked. There she was though, splashing around in her pool with her two older sisters, the sexy and intriguing Rosalie Hale and the shorter, more ADD Alice Swan. I decided to act as if I did it on purpose and I rode Smokey right up to the white fence.

"Hey baby girl, me and old Smokey boy here were just riding through and we decided to see how my best girl was doing?"

"Oh I'm just fine, and how are you?" Rose's haughty voice rose above Bella's quieter one. But we both laughed and Bella climbed out of the pool looking perfectly delicious in her bathing suit. She walked over to the fence and patted Smokey's nose and then I leaned down carefully anticipating a kiss and she just patted my nose too.

"What was that all about?"

"Oh, well I thought I was just handing out nose pats?"

"Silly girl," I said as I leaned down to kiss her and then I rode away, knowing that if she wanted to spend another night with me I would have to let her have her family bonding time and all that shit.

* * *

(BPOV)

To: B

From: E

On my way, got basket? Love you.

His text message was sweet, yet straight to the point. I had spent almost an hour with Rose trying to find an outfit that was cute enough for camping with my boyfriend. We pretty much left Alice in the dark as far as Edward was concerned. She would totally tell Renee' and Charlie if she knew it was anyone besides me and Tori.

"I still think you should just wear the black bikini with the shorts and tank over it. I don't understand why you have to wear that new top and those shorts that you just got the other day. You'll ruin them in that dirty creek."

"Oh Rose, lay off it. Can you go pack that basket while I get my bag and stuff and get changed?"

She nodded and with a shake of her hair I was left alone in my room, humming to "Hey Soul Sister" by Train. I grabbed my overnight bag, just a simple blue and red plaid Abercrombie bag that I stuffed some black Soffee shorts and a red tank and some black flip flops. That should be sufficient.

My light-wash blue jean shorts from American Eagle and my white eyelet bikini top lay on my bed, calling me to put them on. I knew my summer tan would work to my advantage, I knew how Edward felt about tans and how they turned him on. I slipped out of my stretched out tee-shirt and my cut off sweat pants and walked around my room, putting finishing touches on curling my hair and fixing my eyeliner, bopping to the music that rang out of my iPod dock.

"_Off in the night while you live it up I'm off to sleep  
Waging wars to shake the poet and the beat  
I hope it's gonna make you notice  
I hope it's gonna make you notice"_

Sure, everyone around here is into country music, and I loved it just as much as any other country girl, but I really, really love my Kings of Leon.

I slipped my gray bra off and into my bag, and tied the bikini around my neck and back. Then I exchanged comfortable red briefs for a sexy black thong. I was hoping they wouldn't be on for long; I needed Edward, very badly.

I heard a male voice talking down the hall, it either had to be Jasper or Edward or Emmett, because that voice was far too young to be my Daddy or any of his friends.

"Hey baby", Edward said as I walked down the hall, throwing my bag over my shoulder as I came toward him.

"Let me grab that for you. You want some shoes?"

I looked down at my naked feet and blushed; I was far too used to walking around bare-foot. I rushed to the laundry room and grabbed my warn pair of Chucks and tied them on my feet quickly.

"All ready!"

"Great babe, Rose gave me the basket and I have your bag. The tent is in the back of the truck and so are the poles. We're all ready. Got your cell all charged up?"

I nodded and laughed, I was so stoked to be going camping with him.

The ride to the creek wasn't long, it was through one of his dad, Carlisle's, pastures and we could see the water through the trees as we crept down the dirt road. The smell of the honeysuckle was so strong, it was practically intoxicating and I was entranced by it. I saw his old, green flat bottom boat, waiting at the dock for us. That excited me, I loved that thing. But the closer we got, I realized it was so much more than just a boat. There was a large down comforter in the bottom of it, and several pillows. Edward had come out earlier and prepared all of this, just for me.

The wind felt good on my face as I leaned toward the window, I slipped my hand out and swirled it around, waving as though stroking it through water. The summer sun combined with the soft wind felt amazing.

I turned to look at Edward, really look at him for the first time that day. He wore a pair of washed out jeans, a tight white tee shirt, and his worn in pair of brown boots. God I loved that boy….er, man.

He stopped the truck a bit away from the dock, at the edge of the dirt road, where it met the sloping green grass. He set the tent down by a tree and propped the fishing poles up right beside it.

I fished my bag out of the back of the truck and checked my hair and makeup while he was sitting the basket out, down closer to the water. I spied a quilt in the floor board and I grabbed it, more than happy to have an excuse to go help him.

"Oh, you found Esme's quilt. I hope she doesn't get mad but well…I thought it looked nice, so I brought it."

I smiled and handed it to him so he could spread it. I sat the basket down on the large blanket and plopped down, making room for him right beside me. He sat down as I opened the basket and started fishing around, seeing what Rose had sent us. All I saw was freaking fruit.

_Really Rose?! That's what he's going to think I am, a fruit, he's a man, he needs more than freaking fruit. _

"Ah, grapes and watermelon are my favorite!"

"Really, I was worried that you would want real food?"

"Nah, I'm not really hungry. This whole thing was just to spend time with you anyway. I don't plan on feasting the whole time…on fruit anyways…"

His sly grin gave me hope that it wouldn't be a repeat of last night. He popped open a bottle of water and squirted a little on my thigh.

"Hey, not fair!"

"All's fair in love and war babe. And this is love so…you know."

He was enjoying teasing me way too much. But I still loved it all the same.

He had pulled out a slice of watermelon and was chowing down on it.

"Hey honey, look over here."

I looked at him and he pushed it in my direction. I opened my mouth and he guided it in gently and let me take a bite. I reciprocated with a handful of grapes, I told him to lean back on his elbows and as he did that, I tossed some grapes at his waiting mouth, us both laughing when I missed and cheering when I rang it.

When we'd had our fill of the fruit he pulled me up and I laid my head against his chest. He kissed my forehead and said, "Hey love, can I show you something?"

"Mhmm, what is it?"

He looked at me like a little kid, showing off something he had just found. As he held my wrist and we walked through a grove of trees, I saw a central tree with a tire swing.

"Wanna swing baby girl?"

My eyes lit up and I pulled away from him and ran to the swing jumping in as quickly and carefully as I could. He walked over to me and started gently spinning me around and swinging me. It was completely sweet and innocent, yet sexy and sensual in a way. He leaned over and I leaned back, and we kissed spider-man style, me upside down, it was incredible.

We played around the swing some more and he went off to put the basket away and set up the tent and I went to sit on the dock. I was sitting there all alone, watching him and I realized how lucky I was to be able to spend time with someone who meant so much to me.

I didn't need an expensive date night out, I didn't have to go see a movie with him, or have him buy me expensive presents. All I needed was an old tent, one of Esme's quilts and the boy I loved.

I got up from the dock, slipped my chucks off next to where his boots laid next to the truck and I lay down gently on the quilt. I saw him propping the poles back up and as he started walking over I propped up on my elbows.

He stopped and pointed at the water, I just shook my head. I had worked on my appearance too much to mess it up just now.

What I saw next surprised me. He pulled off his white tee-shirt and threw it on the ground, next to some bushes. He proceeded to do the same with his jeans. I was in shock as he started walking over to me.

He reached out for my hand, and I generously handed it to him.

"Come swim with me, please, Bells?"

"Nope, I worked on my hair and makeup all day for you Edward Anthony."

"Fine, I just hope you know how to swim."

He reached over and picked me up, throwing me over his shoulder. He jogged down to the dock and then to my astonishment and surprise he threw me into the muddy water and jumped in right beside me.

I came up; my hair a wet mess, looking into his eyes with a glare that quickly wore off when he brushed my cheek.

All of a sudden, his southern sly grin flashed in my direction and before I knew it his hands came up out of the water, holding his water logged gray boxers like a prize.

I just had to match it so I pulled my shorts off right behind him and threw them onto the dock, my bikini top quickly followed.

His eyebrows shot up, knowing there was one article still on me.

I stretched my eyebrows up at him and then bent down slowly and seductively. The black thong slid down my legs and I wrapped it around my finger slowly. As I brought it up his face turned slightly red from embarrassment, _or was that the heat?_

I flung it onto the dock and he wrapped his arms around my waist. Our foreheads touched for a brief moment and then he slowly started kissing my neck. I moaned softly as he bit my neck, god that was a turn on, and he sure did know what he was doing.

He moved his head up and kissed my lips just once.

The truck radio was blaring but it didn't bother me at all.

_We're not doing anything wrong…we're just cooling off. This June is so hot and sticky, it makes perfect sense…_

He leaned up to my ear and kissed it once, then whispered, "How about we crawl into my boat…"

The sun was coming down as he slowly helped me from the water into the flat bottom boat….


	3. All Dressed Up and Somewhere To Go

**Disclaimer: I have a bestest guy friend, who is amazing. But I definatly do not own Twilight or any of the characters.**

**A/N: Guys, I have many apologies to make. I promised to have the chapter up by Tuesday at the latest, but sadly, it's Thursday and here I am. I will give you a little insight if you do review and i promise to update by Saturday. Thank you all very much, I owe all my love to you. Please leave me ideas, and I'm sorry to say...this ends with a cliffy. So hurry! Read! Now! Go do it!**

**Also, a rec. for this chapter, my friend ktmarie, has a story...If It Kills Me. Please read it and encourage her, she's amazing!**

**Last note, I promise. The outfits for this chapter are on my profile, go check them out!!**

* * *

_**"All Dressed Up and Somewhere to Go"**_

(BPOV)

I woke up feeling somewhat disoriented, attempting to figure out where I was. I looked around and felt Edward's arm thrown around my shoulder, and feeling the warm sun drench my skin. The down comforter underneath me felt amazing and the water gently rocking me almost made me want to just bury down into Edwards side and stay there, but the sunrise was so beautiful that I just propped up on one of my elbows and watched the sun slowly ascend into the morning sky.

I was pleased with the fact that Edward and I hadn't done anything other than our very intense make-out session. He knew I was more nervous than I let on, because my begging had ceased.

I had moved into a sitting up position, slowly as to not jostle Edward, and now I was sitting with my arms pulled up around my knees. I felt Edward sit up and then his arms wrapped around me slowly, as if relishing our embrace.

"It's beautiful out here, thanks for bringing me Edward…"

"It is beautiful. But when I say it, I don't mean the sunrise, I mean this sexy girl sitting next to me, who I delight in any time I spend with her."

"Edward…about last night, I'm sorry I chickened out on you. I mean, I wanted to, but you knew that I was scared didn't you?"

"Baby girl, you're only sixteen, I don't expect you to be ready. When you're ready, we'll get along with it, but until then, grow up at your own pace, not mine. You just allow me to be there to watch all your milestones and help you through them, those are the things I want the most."

His smile met mine and I rubbed my head on his hard chest.

"I have to have you home by ten you know…so if you want to head to the house then we could cook some breakfast. I was under the impression that Tori and Jazz were going to iHop this morning, so we'll have the whole kitchen to ourselves."

"Did yall sell Emmett off to the circus or something?"

Edward's jovial laugh almost made me laugh, but I really was concerned, I hadn't even seen him since last Sunday.

"Oh, he's been at his friend Alec's lately. You know how boys are when they're fifteen, always wanting to go four-wheeler riding and just swimming and shit. He'll be around this afternoon. You could even ride with me to get him if you want."

I nodded, because I truly did like Emmett, he was a good friend to have and he could always make me laugh. Then again, all of the Cullen boys did a good job of that for me.

The sun was officially up by the time we stopped talking and taking slow, sweet kisses from one another and Edward finally had to pull the boat back to the dock using a rope that kept it from drifting out too far.

I checked my phone and noticed that it was only six thirty, so we practically had a whole day together before I had to report for duty as Edward called it. It was just time I had to spend at home so my parents would let me do stuff.

Edward climbed out of the boat, and like a perfect southern gentlemanly fashion he turned to help me up and instead of just letting me crawl out, he reached down and picked me up bridal style. My cheeks burned with pleasure as he carried me to the truck, where my shoes were.

"I didn't know how you felt about getting your feet dirty, even though I should've known; you go barefoot enough as it is."

"Thanks Edward, now I feel like your trashy trailer park girlfriend."

"Nah, you don't have a baby on the way, a baby on the hip, and you most defiantly don't buy your wardrobe at Dollar General."

I giggled, like freaking giggled and I tried to stop myself, but Edward touched my cheek when he realized I was trying to cover up my girly laugh.

"Don't ever try to be something you aren't around me, Bells."

"But my laugh sounds so…young. Doesn't that bother you?"

"Bella, if dating a much younger girl was a problem then I wouldn't have done it in the first place. I love you for who you are, not who you're going to be."

I looked away while lacing up my Chuck's. My age was a sore subject between us, but not with Edward really, just me. I had convinced myself that when we actually were together that he would realize I was far too young for him, but he persuaded me every time that I was dissevering of him, and that he was lucky to have me, that's why I love my Edward Anthony.

Edward pulled on his boots and double checked to make sure all my stuff was in the truck and then he got in and we headed back to the house.

"When are you taking me fishing?"

"Fishing, well…I haven't really thought anything about it to tell you the truth. I haven't gone since before I left, and that's when Mike went with me. But I'd be more than happy to take you…but not today."

"Why not…" I did my best pouty face.

"Ah babe, it isn't that I don't want to take you fishing, but you know tonight is supposed to be our first official date. I want to take you out."

"Eeee, where are you taking me?"

"I thought we'd just do dinner and a movie…you know, typical teenage date night, right?"

"We can do whatever you want us to do. I don't have to be a typical teenager. That's why you're dating me right?"

Edward laughed and grabbed my hand that was resting by my thigh.

"No baby girl, you are anything but typical. I love you though. And I'll find something for you and me to do. Would you be okay with dinner and a movie?"

"I'm fine with anything…as long as it's with you."

My sidelong glance made him laugh again, and he squeezed my hand as his old truck bounced over the last bump and skidded to a short stop in his gravel driveway. I noticed Jazz's truck was gone, but Tori's little black car was still parked in the yard, so I knew they were still gone.

"Breakfast here we come", Edward muttered under his breath, and I giggled again.

"What, if you're so into breakfast, you make it and I'll watch, Jimmy Dean."

"Hey, that's Aunt Jemimah to you!"

We both laughed as he grabbed my bags and tossed them into the passenger side of my truck for me. Then we held hands and I pulled him along as I skipped up the walkway to the house and opened the gate to the pool area.

There was absolutely nothing in the Cullen family's new cabinets. I found some toast, some eggs, milk, salt, sugar, and vanilla. There was also a little bit of crunched up Captain Crunch so I grabbed that too, just to see what I could do with it.

I heard Edward open and then close the door to the basement, and moments later I heard the shower turn on and all I could think was how lucky he was to get to shower before breakfast.

I set to mixing the sugar, salt, eggs, vanilla, and milk in a bowl, and then I soaked the bread in it.

After the bread soaked for a while I dipped it in the crunched up Captain Crunch for extra crispiness and then I browned the bread on each side. I slid the crunchy French toast onto two plates and dusted it with some powdered sugar I found in a cabinet and I placed them on the table and filled two glasses full of orange juice.

"Whoa, this smells awesome, lady."

I looked up and saw my sexy Edward; he was fresh out of the shower, wearing some red mesh shorts and no shirt. His hair (or lack thereof) was still a damp and I could see that his skin was still wet from the shower, but just barely, because of the way he was so thorough when drying himself.

"Yeah, it's just something I whipped up. I actually need to eat and run, I've got to shower and stuff at the house, and I think we have to do some stuff, but I'll check. Didn't you say you wanted me to ride with you to get Emmett?"

"You don't have to…it was just an invitation."

"Oh, I'll ask mom and then text you after I ask. She should be home when I get there."

We ate in silence, his left hand gently finding its place on my right thigh. I smiled at him as he appreciatively moaned when he put the first bite in his mouth.

Breakfast was over entirely too fast and I started to put the dishes in the dishwasher.

"No baby let me do that. I have nothing to do until I go get him at around one…so just let me do it for you. Thanks again, love."

He placed a gentle kiss on my forehead and then a deeper one on my lips. His tongue met mine, and they fought for entrance into the other's mouth. They battled as he pushed my back up against the door.

"Uh-uh. This isn't working for me, I have to go home baby. And my mouth is all yucky from breakfast and I need a shower…"

"You're beautiful. Don't tell me any part of you is "yucky", because baby, I beg to differ. But go home, got to please good ole' mom and dad. I love you."

I knew he watched me as I drove out of the driveway and headed to my house. I secretly hoped that he would randomly show up on Smokey again…

* * *

(EPOV)

I stacked the dishes in the dishwasher after I watched Bella get into her truck and leave. I didn't really have all that much to do while she was gone, but I planned on making the most of my afternoon. Dad wanted me to repaint the trim on the outside windows and put some chemicals in the pool and just some chores that he didn't really have time to do with him always being on the road.

I needed to call this new restaurant that was in town. Anniston was about thirty minutes away, but it was the nearest "big" town close to where we lived. There was supposed to be this really cool, up-to-the-minute, Mexican restaurant. I knew it was expensive, but I figured I could dip into my paycheck from the Air Force to treat my girl to some good food, maybe some ice cream, and then a movie. Sure it was a typical teenage thing to do, but it was better than what most teenagers did around here on date nights, they proceeded to go to the local gas station and get drunk in the parking lot in the beds of trucks. Fan-freaking-tastic, right?

I finished the trim in no time and as I was washing out my brushes I checked my phone for the time, it was about twelve-thirty, but Em and Bella had already both texted me, Em asking what time I would be there to pick him up and Bells to tell me that she would be ready to go in about thirty minutes.

I hit reply to Em's and told him that I would be at Alec's in about an hour, then I replied to Bella's and told her I would be there in thirty to pick her up. Then I frantically ran downstairs to find something to wear. I knew Bella really didn't mind, and she would love it if I came shirtless, but I wanted to wear something half-decent looking.

I had a pair of rust-red shorts from Abercrombie and a gray Yale tee-shirt with just darker gray writing on it, I thought it would look okay with my black Nikes so I pulled all that on, making sure my black ankle socks were tucked in just right.

I grabbed my keys and my phone and locked the door behind me as I ran out the door. I realized that tonight would be Friday night, Oxford and Anniston would be really crowded, hopefully a lot of Teenagers didn't eat at the Iguana grill.

My old truck was in front of Bella's house in no time, and she walked out of the house looking stunning as always, but what she wore really gave me the chuckles. She was wearing a pair of cut off denim shorts, her worn-in pair of black chucks and to my surprise, a soft blue Yale shirt with white writing. We were twins and it completely surprised me.

I had bought my shirt on a trip to New York with Carlisle. After she got into the truck and realized that we matched, she proceeded to tell me that her friend Angela had bought hers when she attended at DECA conference in New York.

The ride to Alec's was quiet, yet still it was okay because she slid over to the middle of the front seat and laid her palm on my thigh. I was trying to fight the urge of showing her how turned on I was, so I gently reached down and took her hand, I had to keep my male hormones under control.

We pulled up into the yard and I started to open my door so I could walk up to get Em, but Bella said that she wanted to surprise him so she ran up the walkway and knocked on the door. Alec's mom, Tanya answered and sent for Emmett and as Bella waited on the front porch, she poked her lip out and me and pretended to be impatient.

Suddenly, my baby bro appeared at the door with his bag over his shoulder. He was walking looking down at the ground-that is until he realized my legs didn't look like that, and he looked up into Bella's beautiful face.

"Bells! I've missed you!"

"I just saw you last Sunday Em…but I missed you too, that's why I came with Edward to pick you up, silly goose."

He hugged her hard and then they climbed in the truck, where Edward dropped Bella back by her house before he took Em home.

"I'll be by to pick you up at five thirty, okay babe? Our movie is at eight."

She nodded her pretty little head at me and walked in her front door and blew me a kiss before she closed it.

* * *

(BPOV)

I climbed out of the shower at about three o'clock. I still had to apply makeup, fix my hair, and dress before Edward picked me up for first official date.

After I dried my hair, Rose came in to help me with my makeup and styling my hair. She decided just to curl my hair a bit, basically leaving it in beautiful waves that I didn't even know my hair could make. Then she proceeded to put a bit of foundation, eyeliner, and powder on me. She finished with a dash of blush, a small swipe of glittery gray-blue eye shadow, and mascara.

I glanced at the clock, it was almost five fifteen and I didn't want him to have to wait on me at all, just in case we had to wait or anything like that.

When I saw the outfit that Rose bought as an early birthday present for me, I was automatically worried that I would be underdressed, but a quick phone call from Rose to Edward confirmed that as long as it was a bit dressy then I would be okay.

She presented me with a pair of cute black, bloomer style shorts, a gorgeous chiffon tunic with a light gray animal print and pretty blue detailing, a pair of pretty patent leather-suede wedges, a beautiful clutch incrusted in crystals, a silver maple leaf necklace, and an adorable black cuff with different shades of blue stones attached to it. It was most possibly the best birthday present ever.

When I was completely dressed and accessorized, Rose quickly pulled me up next to her in what I thought was a loving embrace. But no, she whispered into my ear.

"If you so much as lose or mess up one part of this outfit, I will hang you up by your ears myself, this cost too much for you to fuck it up. Oh, and I love you. Have fun and be safe."

All too soon, Edward was at the door as I kissed my Daddy and Mom goodbye and practically ran out the door in my heels and jumped into Edward's waiting arms.

"Well hey lady, it's good to see you too."

He planted a sweet kiss on my lips, as he tasted the sweet apple lip gloss I had applied right before he rang the doorbell; it matched the perfume I was wearing, Red Delicious.

"Mhmm, I love the way you smell. I just want to lick you…must we go to the restaurant?"

I giggled. I loved when he talked to me that way, despite the fact that I was slightly intimidated by doing things with him. As he opened the door for me to get into his truck, I laughed because his hand grabbed my butt through my shorts.

"Edward Anthony, behave yourself!"

"Ha, why would I do that?"

"Because you love me and you want me to be happy?"

"Wouldn't you like to meet naughty Edward…just once?"

I grinned broadly at him as he cranked the truck.

"Well….maybe just once."

"Your birthday is tomorrow."

"You're correct, my dear."

"I guess this is your birthday date with me, you have to spend the day with your family don't you?"

"I do…but tomorrow night we can do something, I wouldn't object to that."

Edward laughed at me and we rode together the thirty minutes into town, singing along to songs on the radio, waving to random strangers, and I even allowed Edward to pass this old woman and then drive even slower than she was just to piss her off. It was fantastic and fun.

Soon enough we arrived at the Iguana Grill, one of the newest and hippest restaurants in town. Not a lot of teenagers came here, mostly because it was fairly expensive and a bit upscale.

Surprisingly I didn't feel out of place, Edward wore a pair of khaki pants, but just a plain blue polo shirt and some boat shoes. He opened the door for me and then the hostess took us to a table in the very back, in a pretty little booth with Christmas-type lights hung all around it.

"I know it's not really the cool hang out for teenagers, but I thought it might be a good change of scenery. I hope you like it. Afterwards, I thought we might go see that movie with Ashton Kutcher? The Killers I think it is."

The food was delicious, Edward has Las Tortas and I had Carne Gringo Fajitas. They were delicious and afterwards Edward paid the bill and then we headed to the mall so we could go see our movie.

We walked into the mall hand-in-hand and I was practically glowing, all of a sudden Edward pulled me into a home decorating store.

"What in the hell are we doing in here, the movie starts in fifteen minutes. The theater is right over there, not a hundred feet away. Let's go."

"You don't understand Bells. One of those girls out there is my ex girlfriend, the one I had all through high school, she even followed me to Auburn."

"Ugh, can we just go Edward. You're being completely silly."

"Honey, I know you hate me to bring this up, especially on our first date. But it's illegal for us to be together and I'm not sure how Irina is going to take it and she might make things very bad for us."

"Whatever, give me eight fifty, I'm going to see my movie. Edward, you go do whatever you want. I don't want to get you in trouble, but you could still come across the fucking mall with me. I'm not even asking to hold your hand, but whatever, just whatever."

I felt tears pricking at my eyes, I didn't want Edward to get in trouble, but I didn't want him to have to be terrified of being with me either. It felt so wrong and I was really hurt. But all of a sudden he kissed my cheek, and then my lips. After I left him do that, he grabbed my hand, bravely and then escorted me across the mall, right in front of a very bitchy looking Irina, who although looked evil, didn't even notice Edward or me.

We got into the movie, we were the first people in the theater and Edward pulled both of my hands to his chest and our faces were very close, almost touching, but not quite. His breath was sweet in my face; I really just want to drink it in.

"Bella, you mean the world to me, I never want to lose you. You are absolutely my life, my everything, my reason for even coming back here, yet my reason for going back to Texas."

My mind went wild as he said that.

_I force him to go back, yet I'm his reason for coming home? What in the fuck does that even mean?!_

"Before you interrupt me, because I know that sounded all wrong…but I have to make myself go back because of you. I know when I go back to training, I'm making money to support you one day, to help us have a family. I'm also protecting you, while I'm protecting the entire country. I love you, I would give up anything for you, even my life, and I know that doesn't mean so much since I'm willing to give my life for my country, but you…you are all I need or want."

"Edward, no one has ever said things like that to me. I'm sixteen…but you just, oh Edward."

"Bella, before I make you to cry…I do have something to tell you, it could change the course of this relationship, the course of my life…of yours too."


	4. Exchanging Body Heat

**A/N: Guys, I'm so sorry for taking so long on this! I'm sure that I'll get more up when we get out for Christmas break, but I've had finals and papers and projects due so it's insane how little time I've had to write. But this is just a little shortie chapter, but I hope you like it. You might think this is lemony, but it could be a whole lot worse! Just beware, if you don't like a bit of smexy stuff, then don't read it! Oh and guys, if you review, you get a teaser!!! So please help me out and review! =)**

**Disclaimer: I have a horrible cold, and some snazzy flash cards with elements on them, but I don't own Twilight. =(**

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(EPOV)

I knew when I started telling her my heartfelt feelings, that there was no turning back. Our hands were intertwined and my words had already brought tears to the corners of her eyes. My heart was breaking because I knew how upset I had been when I received the phone call today. I couldn't imagine telling Esme and Carlisle, they would be as upset as Bella and I were.

"Honey, look at me now."

She sniffled twice and pressed her pointer finger into the corners of her eyes, linked her hand back with mine, and then she gave me a hopeful smile. I could tell she was trying to be optimistic, you could practically hear her screaming in her mind that I would be proposing or something positive like that.

"We may have to be apart for a little bit longer than I originally thought."

"Edward," she said in a very timid voice, "How much longer is a little bit?"

"Well, I can't share much with you…I'm not at liberty too. Even I am on a need-to-know basis as it is. I just know my recruiter called and said I had a sort of training mission…Bella I just need to know if you want to wait for me or not? My heart is breaking at the thought of leaving you behind, hell I don't even really want to go back to Texas, but I have to go where I'm needed."

"Edward, I could never leave you. No matter how far you go, I'll be waiting right here, patiently, until the day that I can follow you."

"Yeah, well…as long as you do know, I'll be gone for a while, at least a month or two. I'll be in an undisclosed location, no Skype, no phone calls, no emails, and not even a letter. You won't be able to hear from me until I get done with my mission. It may be dangerous, and I could possibly not make it out, but I have faith in my training that I've had so far."

Bella nodded, her big brown eyes soaking in all the details I had just given her. She started to say something, but then the previews starting sliding across the screen and we leaned back to enjoy our movie, my hands on her thigh, hers on mine.

* * *

(BPOV)

As we walked out of the movie theater, hand in hand, my heart was heavy. Edward had tried to make me feel better, he had even kissed me when the movie was over which was a huge deal because it was in public.

I wasn't sure how I was going to handle being away from him for two months with no contact. When he was in Texas, at least there were letters and the occasional phone call. I would just miss him, and probably worry a lot.

There was always the what-if factor, like what if he never made it back to me?

That was the moment in which I decided I was having sex with Edward Cullen.

"Edward, may I spend the night with you?"

"Sure baby, do you think your parents will let you?"

I picked up my cell phone and texted my mom:

To: Mama

From: B

May I spend the night at the Cullen house? Tori will be there.

Sooner than I thought, mom replied and told me that she didn't mind, I just had to be home early in the morning since it was my birthday, like ten would be fine.

I was really excited, but all of a sudden adrenaline was coursing through my veins because I knew what I would be doing later.

I pulled at Edward's arm until he looked at me. Then I planted a sweet, soft kiss on his lips and just smiled. He knew that I wanted more, but he pulled back, we were still in public after all.

We climbed into his truck, making a quick stop at the gas station and then we headed home. The thirty minute ride felt like eternity, as he felt my leg up gently, almost like playing the game Nervous that a lot of my guy friends had done to us girls when we were all about thirteen or fourteen.

The minute we pulled up in front of his house our hands were all over each other once again. He barely got the keys out of the ignition before I covered his mouth with kisses.

I shoved him backwards, into his door, crawling on top of his lap. This was so intense, and the feeling of pressing him backwards and being in control was amazing. I wasn't even really sure how I knew what to do, but I liked it.

Edward pushed me back just long enough to pull him away from the door and open it, and then he climbed out swiftly and pulled me out behind him, into his arms.

We practically raced from the truck to the front porch, where he frantically unlocked the door and then he carried me bridal style over the threshold, carefully closing the door behind us with his foot.

"Bella, do you want to…go downstairs now?"

I nodded my head quickly, I didn't need to stall or else I might lose my nerve. I wanted Edward, really I did. But I was very afraid of what I was going to face when we entered the basement bedroom.

Edward carefully took me down the stairs, he never even faltered as he carried me down the steep staircase. I could almost feel him taking his options into consideration, there was the couch, which could be more comfortable, but only if we decided not to go all the way, and then there was the bed, the obvious choice. But Edward was deeply interested in making this easy and comfortable for me, which was part of the reason why I knew he loved me so much.

He kissed my forehead sensuously and I smiled slightly as his kisses went down the curve of my cheek and then they ended on my lips with his tongue gently battling with mine.

"Let me go…change and maybe turn the fan on. It's hot in here, yeah?"

I nodded, feeling a soft flush creep up my shoulders and onto my cheeks, meeting the smoldering feeling of Edward's lips and just threw hot flashes all over my body. The shorts and shirt just felt confining, so I ended up shrugging out of the shirt, laying there on Edward's covers in just my black shorts with my matching black thong underneath, my black bra, and my jewelry still on.

I heard Edward's closet door open and shut, and then I heard him bang around in his bathroom, water was running, and then a cabinet slammed. Edward's nerves were truly getting to me, my legs shook although I wasn't cold, and in fact a slight sheen of sweat glistened across my body.

My heels felt awkward on my feet, but as I was about to lean up to remove them, Edward stepped out of the bathroom.

"Sorry, um, where were we baby?"

He smiled confidently at me, although I could tell that he had a million and one thoughts running through his head. His chest was beautiful and sculpted; I longed to run my hands over every chiseled part, maybe stroke his abs with my tongue.

_No, silly Bella, there is more than enough time for that later. Let's get the hard part over with now._

I wasn't really sure how all this sex stuff worked, I mean, I had obviously been with no one before, but I knew Edward had some experience under his belt. He was amazingly gentle as he quietly walked to his bed, where I was propped up on my elbows, taking his body in with my eyes.

"Hey beautiful, it's all okay. I'm just gonna get these shoes off, okay?"

I nodded at Edward, afraid that if I spoke then my voice would give away how nervous I was. I knew that if I let on how I truly felt to Edward that he would never continue.

He slid down onto his knees in front of my feet, I shivered needlessly, and the air blowing from the fan was blocked mostly by Edward's muscular frame. He slid my left foot into his hands and undid the fastener and then tossed it kindly to the side. He proceeded to kiss my ankle tenderly and then laid it back on the bed. He repeated this process with my other foot and then kissed up my entire leg, until he reached my knee.

He gently stroked the inside of my right thigh with one of his fingers and I broke out with chill bumps.

"Are you okay with this Bella?"

I nodded again, but he was onto me.

"Bella, I need you to tell me if you don't like something, or if you need something, I need to know if you're okay. Please Bella."

His voice sounded pained, and from out of no where I managed to choke out, "Edward, I'm okay."

He smiled down at me, and then took up his position between my legs. I had never had anyone so close before, it was quite unnerving. He gently rubbed the inside of my thigh, and then motioned for me to slide my butt up so he could slide my shorts off. I propped my butt up, allowing him to slip off my bloomer shorts. He slightly gasped at the sight of my black thong; I knew he would love it.

I might have jumped back when I felt his hot breath on my pelvic bone, but he had hooked his thumbs through the sides on my thong, so he quickly tugged me back to him.

While he was doing all that, I tried to distract myself; I pulled off my bangle and tossed it onto the bedside table. Edward apparently could read my mind or something, he worked his way up my stomach, kissing quickly, biting small parts of me, until he reached my face.

"You ready baby?"

_Um, no. I'll never be ready, I'm freaking scared of having sex with my beautiful boyfriend because I don't know what the hell I'm doing._

But of course I would never say that to Edward.

"I'm ready."

What happened in the next few seconds was all a blur. My thong came off, Edward was on his knees above me, ready to do what we both wanted. But all of a sudden, everything fell apart.

I started sobbing, and Edward stopped kneeling over me. He climbed off of me, and turned to face me and then I was in his lap, crying and crying harder. He put on his boxers, finding a pair of shorts for me, since my thong was no where to be found.

"Baby, Bella, my love. Please stop crying, what's wrong? Did I hurt you? Tell me what I did so I can make it better?"

I had almost recovered myself, my sobs had almost seceded, that is until I looked at the bedside table and saw the green apple flavored condom that he had brought out for us. I knew I had just ended something that Edward had really wanted. I blamed myself for ruining this, the tears fell faster, hotter, and they burned as they came out, killing the mood, every shred of pride I had, every slice of sex appeal that I still had…it was gone just like that.

"Bella, love, can you please pull yourself together for one moment?"  
I sniffled a few times, just trying to clear my throat and nasal passages.

"Love, I'm very sorry if I pushed you, I never meant to. Do you think you can sit up with me for a moment?"

I nodded and pushed myself up on my elbows as he pulled a black fleece pull-over out of a box by his bed.

"Here doll, won't you put this on?"

"Edward…"

My voice shook, it didn't sound at all like I wanted it to. I wanted it to be strong, to tell him I was ready to try again. We had been so close; all I wanted was to feel him inside. What was wrong with me? My mind and my body were saying two different things.

He was waiting patently for me to speak.

"Edward, I'm sorry that I was scared…it wasn't any of your fault. I'm not really sure why I was so scared. I want to be that for you, the woman. Not this scared little girl."

He shoved his fingers through his hair, taking a deep breath in, exasperated with me, I suppose.

"Bells, stop saying things like that. You're the woman I fell in love with. That little girl, she disappeared when you wrote that first letter to me. You're so mature, and special, and sweet. I love you, no matter if you want to have sex with me, or if we never have sex. If it scares you so much, sure I'd love to help you over come that, but I'd love to just be there. It's not about sex."

I knew automatically when he said that, he truly meant it. With Edward, nothing he said was just words, he meant everything, and said nothing lightly. I wondered how long he pondered the more serious questions. How to ask me out, how to tell his parents about his Air Force decision? It must have taken him days, maybe even weeks.

"Edward, this is why I love you, why I can't stay away from you, mostly why I need you."

He pulled me close to him, helped me into his fleece pull-over and then settled me against his chest. I felt his breath in my hair, his long fingers stroked my neck, and then they rested on my waist.

Before I knew it, his mouth attached to my neck and sucked and licked and kissed hard. I moaned softly, wanting him to continue.

"Is this good Bella?"

My moans answered his question.

All too soon he stopped, letting up and then stopping altogether.

"Oh my God, Edward, you have blood on your lips!"

He looked into the mirror that was on the door of his closet, seeing the thin line of red that dripped from his lips.

"Bells…are you okay?"

I moved my face, so I could see my neck in the mirror, from the bed.

There was a large, bruise-like mark on my neck, small dots of blood were outlining it, but it didn't burn, only a slight hot sensation from his mouth was all that was left behind.

"No, I feel…wonderful. It was perfect."

"I can't ever lose control like that; if I hurt you…I'm not sure what I would do. I must have gotten caught up in the moment and sucked and bit too hard."

I laughed at him and he looked at me with questioning eyes.

"Why are you laughing?"

"You marked me, now I'm all yours."

"Bella, this isn't funny. I doubt your parents, nor mine will be very pleased that I "marked" you."

I knew they wouldn't like it, but I really didn't care. Edward showing the world that I belonged to him was a very dear thing to me.

"May I have another one, Edward please?"

"I can't put anything else on your neck. You're going to have a hard time covering that one up as it is."

"No…I mean one for just us to see. Maybe you could leave it on the inside of my thigh?"

He nodded and gently laid me back. I spread my legs and allowed him access to the inside of my left thigh. His tongue felt soft and his teeth tickled a little as they bit and nibbled at my leg.

All of a sudden, his fingers that were holding up the mesh shorts he had given me to put on made their way inside of my shorts. His fingers gently grazed my nether regions and I fought the urge to pull my legs together. His hand slipped back out, and all of a sudden we heard a crash from upstairs.

"What the fuck?!"

Edward pulled his mouth up, and as he was only wearing boxers he quickly jumped up and ran to his closet to grab a pair of mesh shorts.

I huddled on the bed, not sure what it was, and it was dusk outside, who would break in at dusk.

"Shit it's Carlisle and Esme!"

"What!? I thought they wouldn't be home until tomorrow?"

"No! It's today; we have to make this look better, now! I promised Carlisle."

I jumped up, knowing automatically that he must have promised Carlisle that we wouldn't have sex.

"What can I do Edward?"

"Go fix yourself; you're a complete mess, find clothes that aren't skanky…or the clothes from our date. I have some shorts and tee shirts in my bottom drawer in the closet, get some of those."

I grabbed a hunter green tee-shirt and some silver mesh shorts, and then I dashed into the bathroom.

Edward of course was making his bed, stacking magazines back in his box and putting my cuff bracelet back on the table, sitting by his iPod dock.

He found his Yale shirt which went with red mesh shorts from earlier that morning. I saw him walk to the other side, and heard him flip the TV onto a news channel.

I splashed my face with cold water, rinsing away all the tears, Edward was right about one thing, the hickey, or passion mark, whatever you want to call it, looked horrible. I didn't care though, I dabbed a washcloth at it, and then threw my wavy hair into a messy ponytail.

"You look beautiful, baby girl." Edward said as he pulled me onto his lap as he watched the local evening news.

"Thanks…why haven't Carlisle or Esme came down here yet?"

"They probably won't. They don't want to embarrass us, but they did cause a ruckus upstairs, they don't want us to be loud or any of that."

"Ew, Edward. Seriously. I don't think I'd be a screamer."

"Hey you never know, you were moaning a lot when I was kissing your neck earlier."

I hit his shoulder and sunk into his chest slowly as he covered my forehead with kisses.

"Kids, yall down here?" Esme's sweet southern voice filled the stairwell.

"Yeah Mama, we're just down here watching some TV, come on down."

Esme slipped down the stairs, her footsteps were so soft we almost didn't hear her.

"Hi kids, I was just going to see if she would be staying the night?"

"Yeah mom, she's staying with me tonight, her parents are okay with it."

"Oh, okay then. Well, it's been a long ride in, you're dad is eating some supper and then I think we're just going to get to bed. It's going to be a good afternoon tomorrow right?"

"What's tomorrow?"

"Oh! You're dad forgot to tell you, Jasper, Emmett, you, your father, and I, also Tori and Bella if they wish, are all going fishing at the pond. It's something we always do, remember?"

"Oh, I had forgotten, that's pretty cool, Bells wanted to go anyways."

Esme kissed my forehead as well as her sons and she smiled at us before she turned to walk back up the stairs. As soon as she clicked the door behind her, Edward was kissing my face, pulling his pull-over off of me, we were falling back into his room…could this be it?


	5. You and Me Go Fishing in the Dark

**A/N: Guys I just want to apologize for not being able to get inspired to write soon. I have trouble sometimes getting my ideas down, but I think (hopefully) I did a good job on this chapter! The song for this one is Fishing In The Dark by the Nitty Gritty Dirt Band, and if you read to the end you'll know why. Please review and you'll get a chapter six teaser! Thanks sooo much guys! Also, I have the fishing outfit up on my profile, go check it out!**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight, nor do I have good time management skills, spending four hours at night on the phone...wow, I must really like this guy. =)**

* * *

(EPOV)

Bella looked beautiful. Her body was glistening in the small bits of moonlight that leaked through the random cracks and small windows that I had in my bedroom. Every time I touched her, she jumped into me, her body responding just the way I needed her to. She was on her back, under me and I could feel her every curve and all her smooth skin.

Her tan was so…turning me on. I was so hard for her, I needed her, and she was everything to me. I ran my hand up her slim thigh, she shivered at my touch. I didn't want to push her too fast like I apparently did last time, mostly because it was so much more than sex with her. I mean, I know that but maybe Bella thinks that I just want to tap that…but I can't just do that anymore. I'm too old for that silly drama shit, I want a real relationship with her…but don't real relationships include sex?

Bella noticed my mind wandering because I had stopped tracing her thigh with my fingers, and my raging hard-on had subsided a bit.

"Edward, what's wrong?"

"Nothing Bells…I just got distracted, you know how I am, total ADD."

She giggled and then wrapped her legs around my lower back. I was basically on my knees, hovering over her, and now thanks to her we were close again, only a small amount of air separating us.

She rubbed my chest with her hands, and then went lower, to my pelvis. I looked at her, knowing good and damn well that she wouldn't touch it. Her hands skipped over and then went to my back and then quickly flew to around my neck. Our faces were almost touching; I fought the urge to place a hot kiss on her already swollen lips. She looked as if she was waiting for me to start so I sat up and gathered her in my lap. I kissed her and waited for her; she returned it and straddled my lap.

"Bella, are you sure?"

I rocked her gently until she nodded.

We slowly started melting together, her eyes were clenched tightly shut, yet a tear still leaked out.

Her mouth opened a bit and all I heard was, "Edward…"

I actually didn't even hear her, I wasn't listening for her to say anything, and you know guys…when we're doing what we're doing we really get into it. So I kept doing my thing, still rocking her, and rocking her hard. She was squirming under me; I just thought it was because she was still new, it probably didn't feel too great, so I slowed down.

Suddenly she said it again, crying this time.

"Edward…Edward stop…please stop."

Right as she said it I blew up and then I automatically felt so much shame, my face was probably an explosive color of red.

"Bella, no…oh Bells."

I pulled out and then pulled her up against my chest; she sobbed hard, so hard her whole body shook, scaring me. I never thought I could hurt her so much. She was hot all over, which shouldn't be a big deal, but she hadn't even done anything and she was sweating, her chest heaving with her sobs.

"Bella, can you please, please talk to me? Tell me what I did wrong."

"Edward...oh Edward…it wasn't you…oh."

After about fifteen minutes of me constantly rocking her, she finally looked up at me, and she fucking smiled.

"We did it Edward."

_What the hell is she talking about?_

"Don't look confused…we did it, I finally had sex with you."

"Baby…I hurt you. We didn't do anything."

"You did, I don't think you heard me the first time, and I'm glad. You kept going and yeah…I was scared, but look, we did it, I'm not a virgin anymore!"

Her smile was contagious; I had never seen anyone so happy about giving their "gift" away. I mean, God help us on Sunday, Brother L. was going to have a great time preaching to us. But I wasn't letting spiritual thoughts ruin our moment, even though I had thought it was going to be a horrible one, Bella was quickly sparing me of any heartache I might have suffered from her tears that coated her beautiful face.

"So…honestly Bella, how bad was it? And by the way, I'm so sorry I didn't hear you the first time…I was kind of in the zone."

"Ha-ha, ha-ha, Edward was in the fuck zone!! That's hilarious babe."

"You aren't going to distract me from my question. How bad was it, love?"

She hesitated, as if she was thinking of how to approach the question.

"It wasn't…horrible. Like, I'm not exactly sure, it was pretty…I don't know. It…felt like I was being ripped in half?"

I noticed how her last part came out as a question, like she didn't know if I understood what she meant, and true, I'm not a girl, so I don't really know, but I've been with girls for their first time, and I've heard stories, so I know it's not the best thing ever, but surprisingly Bella did quite well, even though she wanted me to stop half-way through.

"That sounds pretty horrible Bells."

"It would have been horrible, but afterwards you let me cry and you held me. You didn't get all awkward and pull away and walk off and shower or some masculine shit like that. You love me, don't you Edward?"

"I tell you that all the time…"

"But you mean it…like I guess up until now there was a little doubt, and don't get me wrong, that is so not why I did this with you. But now there isn't a doubt, you holding me, and not pushing me, oh Edward, you love me!"

She jumped up onto her knees and kissed me hard, laughing as she bit my lip gently.

"Silly girl, I can't believe you doubted me!"

She held my hands and we sat there, on our knees, just looking at each other, casually kissing for a while.

"I'm sleepy Edward."

"Let's lay down baby, you've had a big day."

"Ha-ha, a VERY big day."

"Shut up Bella. Go to sleep."

I laughed at her, kissed her softly as we laid down, and then rubbed her back until she fell asleep, knowing tomorrow she would be pretty sore, so then the anger would probably come out. Basically, I laughed myself to sleep.

* * *

(BPOV)

The sunlight was streaming through one of the small basement windows and it hit me in the face like someone was shining a flashlight right into my retina. I wanted to pull the covers over my head, but they were wrapped tightly around my body and Edward was lying so close to me, on top of the covers that I couldn't even move. I put my arm over my face dramatically and sighed, just like Scarlett out of Gone with the Wind would do, but in my theatrical movement, I proceeded to hit Edward in the face.

"Shit Bella! What's that for?"

_You shouldn't have been sleeping so close, oh smart one. And I thought they only took like genius-people into his elite group…Lord Help our country. _

"Oh babe, sorry, I didn't mean to punch you in the face."

"Right…anyway, how do you feel?"

I attempted to unhinge all my body parts, my hips being the sorest, but then again, my lips were almost as sore as that, so I can just blame that on all of Edward's hot kisses.

"I'm not as bad as you think I should be I can tell you that. My face hurts though, Edward." I was a whiner, shoot me.

"If I had a face like that, it would probably hurt too."

"Ugh, I hate you Edward."

"No, you love me. And you're going to love little-big Edward even more, once you get to know him."

"Little-big Edward, seriously, you have to be more creative than that."

"Hey, I'm in the Air Force, not a member of an Artist's Society."

I laughed at him, he was so absurd sometimes, but these are the reasons why I love Edward Anthony Cullen.

"Breakfast or no?"

"No…I just want you."

"Now, you know you can't eat Little-Big Edward for breakfast."

I laughed, more of his absurdities, but oh well, what can you do?

"FISHING is today!!"

"Bella, you're a seventeen year old girl, why are you so damn excited about fishing with my family?"

I thought about this for a minute, was it because I never really got to do stuff like this with my family, or was it just because I got to spend more time with Edward?

"I think it's because not only do I get to spend time with you…but I love your family E, and I want them to love me as much as you do."

"Good answer baby girl."

He kissed me deeply, I just wanted to stay forever in his basement bedroom, we could run upstairs when we needed sustenance, but we could lay in bed and make love for hours, or talk, listen to music, watch movies, shower…the list of possibilities were endless. Sadly I knew even this, this fishing and dating and spending ever day together, it wouldn't last long. Texas, and then his training exercise were coming up soon, and I wasn't even sure if I was ready for that to happen. I would miss him so much.

"Bella…tell me what you're thinking about, you know I can't read minds."

Edward moved to where we were laying down once again, I had my head on his strong, muscular chest, and I thought for a second more, if I should tell him.

"Edward…I'm scared."

"Scared of what baby?"

How did I say, _I'm scared of losing you, I'm scared of walking out of this room, and never feeling again like the way I feel when I'm with you._

_Just strap some dance shoes on me and call me Baby._

"Edward, I have so much to tell you, because I'm so scared of everything in my life. I mean…life is never what we think it's going to be. I never would have imagined falling in love with someone so much older than me, someone who was in the Air Force; it just wasn't what I would have chosen. But now I know that I wouldn't want anything different. You mean so much to me, and if I lost you, or you left me for good, I have no idea what I would do. I guess what I'm trying to say is…Edward, I love you."

"B, first of all, thank you for being honest with me, because I know it isn't easy for you to get real with me. I love you too baby girl. You mean the world to me, and I would never leave you if there were any option to stay. So now, what I'm asking is that if you'll wait on me, then part of us will always be together."

Tears leaked from the corners of my eyes, I could tell he was waiting to hear my answer. Even though we had talked about it hundreds of times, or so it seemed, I had never actually given him a straight up answer.

"B, you don't have to tell me now. I just wanted to know, but I'm willing to do whatever I have to do to get you to stay with me. I love you B, baby don't you want to be with me?"

"Edward…I want that more than anything. But what if something happens to you? We both know how dangerous the war is right now, and your field is so…unsafe. I mean, you're going to be a hero Edward, but I don't know if I can sit here at home and think about every time you walk out the door and get on an airplane; you might not come back to me. That thought scares me terribly."

He sat up, pulling my shoulders into his lap so I was staring up at him, into those deep, perfect green eyes. His hands ran through my hair, and the hairs on my neck stood up and I got chill bumps all over.

"Babe, I love having that affect on you."

"What affect, E?"

"This one", he ran his hand down my leg where the chill bumps were standing up as if my skin had gone into shock. He rubbed my leg up and down vigorously until the bumps subsided.

"And now back to the things that scare you…like, my missions. Baby, this has always been my dream, to be there for my country, to protect and serve this great nation, to preserve the freedoms that we have for our children, our children's children. I am going into these assignments with the best training in any military field. We are extremely specialized and there is no way that we would be sent in without the proper training and supplies. I know that must be hard to trust in, because you aren't really familiar with the military, especially with my particular field, but I'm telling you the truth baby, they're going to take great care of me."

I nodded, trying to digest all of the information that he had just given me. I wasn't even sure how to process all of it. I mean, of course, I knew he always wanted to be in the Air Force, Jazz had told me about it because he was so proud of his big brothers dreams. But I had never thought in a million years that he would actually be going into war zones.

"B, you gotta understand. I'm going out there in those dangerous places to save my brothers. I'm going out there to pick up injured soldiers that are someone's son, brother, boyfriend, husband, and maybe someone's dad. I'm doing something that's really making a difference. I won't even be one of the ones shooting people."

"And E, what if they shoot at you? Are you just supposed to smile and wave at them?"

"No…that's where my training comes in handy. If they're extremely dangerous and there isn't anyway to get out quickly and safely, then we fight back. But the biggest concern is protecting the injured soldier and then protecting ourselves, it isn't eliminating the enemy. I need you to understand."

I sighed, I knew I would always wait for him, and I wasn't even waiting because I wanted him to beg, or I didn't want to seem over-eager. But I was waiting because I wanted to be absolutely sure that I wasn't making a big mistake. I had to cover myself first before I worried about him; I didn't want to be broken beyond belief if something happened to him. Oh who was I kidding, if something happened to him, I'd be upset now, no matter what.

I nodded after thinking for a few moments, I knew that we would need to get up and get ready in a little while, but I was enjoying this conversation with Edward, however steeped in complication it was. My head resting on his lap felt just right, his hands were soft on my face, in my hair, on my throat. He leaned down to kiss me and my stomach fluttered, and I couldn't help but to smile as his lips moved on my throat. He pulled his head back up and rested his back against his head board.

"B, I'm glad you understand, and I'm glad you love me…but baby, can I count on you?"

"Edward…I was sitting here thinking, and I was just going through all the possible scenarios of things that might happen to you, and I was trying to figure out if I could bail out now, if I would be hurt less if something happened in the end. But that's when I realized, if you had left yesterday, I would still be caught up in you, and I would still be brokenhearted. With every moment that I spend with you, I become closer and closer to you and I feel like we're connected. I couldn't not wait on you if I wanted to, simply because, you're my everything, you're it for me, I pick you Edward Anthony Cullen."

I sat up as I saw the realization hit Edward. His eyes were glowing and I was deeply in love with him. He touched my cheek as he rubbed his chest into my shoulder. It was a sweet moment, he kissed my forehead and asked if I had some clothes to go fishing in and I nodded my head yes.

I watched him climb out of the bed, tossing the sheets back at me so I could have something to cover up with. His pink boxers with eagles on them made me laugh, and he hurled a pillow at me that had fallen on the floor.

"B, you better get up, if I shower then you won't have any hot water left."

I gave him a sly smile, and cocked my eyebrow up at him.

"Let's just shower together."

He nodded and we both ran into the bathroom, bathing in the luxurious shower, him washing my hair and gently kissing me as the water ran over our skin.

Afterwards he went through his closet, selecting clothes to wear for our outing, his parents had already left and told Edward just to meet them down by the pond where we had gone skinny dipping just a few days earlier.

I went through the bag of clothes that I had stowed away by Edward's bed and grabbed some jean shorts, a burgundy Abercrombie shirt and my chucks. I figured I might get wet, so as I considered that I exchanged my pretty electric blue bra and undies for a black bikini set.

"Mhmm, baby, you look gorgeous."

I looked at where Edward stood in the doorway of his closet. He had on a pair of dark khaki shorts and no shirt. He had been watching as I changed clothes, and normally that would freak me out, but I liked it when it was my Edward.

"B, I love watching you take your clothes off, but I think it might be just as sexy to see you put them on. It's so incredibly hot."

"Edward…I didn't even know you were watching, how was I supposed to be sexy."

"That's just it baby girl, you don't have to try to be sexy."

I grinned hugely at Edward, and walked over to run my fingers across his bare chest. He flexed and it was so hard that I leaned to kiss it.

"B…God, you have to stop. We'll never make it to fish at this rate. I have to go find some clothes; go put your shoes on."

I fell back down on the bed; I wanted to go fishing, of course. But I would have loved to stay home with Edward too…

A few minutes later he came out of the closet wearing the shorts and a hunter green tee shirt. It stretched right across his shoulders and back perfectly and hugged him just right everywhere, I wanted to just climb up in his arms and snuggle, but I knew that we had to get going.

He finished lacing up his shoes and then he grinned at me. Before I knew it I was over his shoulder and he was carrying me up the stairs. I had to grab at my Wayfarers to keep them from crashing to the ground.

"What's that all about?" I asked as Edward sat me down in front of the front door.

"Well, I can't exactly open the door with you over my shoulder. I can pick you up in a minute if you like."

"That's not what I was talking about…but whatever E."

He laughed and after we walked out on the front porch I looked up at him and stood on my tip-toes like I wanted to kiss him. Our faces got really close as he leaned down for my kiss. Just as we were about to kiss, I looked into his eyes and smiled and said, "Race you to the truck" with a smirk and jumped off the porch, running like crazy to the truck.

It wasn't a far run, but Edward quickly jumped off the porch also and caught up to me, and raced past me just as we approached the truck.

"What the hell Edward, how did you do that?"

"Training babe, just my training. We have rapid reflexes and we're swift. See, nothing to agonize about."

We climbed into the truck and headed out of the driveway to the pond, fond memories flooded back. There was the tire swing there, the boat that Edward and I had lain in, the picnic of fruit.

_Mental note to self: Don't forget to kick Rose's butt for that. _

We saw Carlisle's big red truck parked underneath one of the shade trees, and Esme and Tori hanging out by the water with an umbrella and two camping chairs, with a few extra chairs leaned up against a near-by tree. Emmett and Jazz were setting up a picnic table and Carlisle was setting up his grill under another tree. It was such a picture perfect moment that I almost wanted to pull out my digital camera and snap a few just to keep them in my memory forever.

Edward squeezed my hand softly and kissed my cheek and then he got out of the truck, motioning me to wait, he was coming around to open my door for me.

Emmett looked up as he heard the truck doors opening and he ran over, beating my fit Edward to my door and opening it, giving me his hand, just as his older brother would have done.

"Why thank you Emmett, you're so sweet."

"He learned from the best. Em, let go of my girlfriends hand before I take you down a notch."

Edward playfully punched Em on the shoulder and then Emmett ran off to go tackle Jasper who was trying to pull Tori up from her chair.

"Let's go get some poles baby, and head down to the dock. Unless you would rather sit with Tori and Mom, in that case I'll get you a chair and then I'll go catch us something for dinner."

"Silly E, of course I would rather go with you. But don't you think your mom expects me to at least come see her?"

"True, I'll go help Dad set up the grill and then when you get done visiting I'll get the poles and we'll go fish."

I gave him a blinding smile and trotted off to where Tori and Esme were, grabbing a camping chair on my way.

"Bella dear, it's about time yall showed up."

Esme gave me a knowing look, but she didn't look disappointed in me, so I didn't feel bad.

"Tori and I were just discussing how Edward looks since he came back, what do you think?"

"Oh I think he looks great, all the training has him really built up. He's pretty proud of all that he's done to get stronger."

"Well dear, I wasn't actually referring to his body, although he is stronger now. I was referring to how much more he smiles, since he's been around you. You're working miracles on him, Bella."

"Yeah Bella, I mean, the way he calls you B is so cute. And he beams every single time he sees you. I've never been so happy, even Jazz says that he's really crazy about you."

Esme and Tori's comments made me a little uncomfortable but I smiled and said thank you to them. Tori eyed me suspiciously because I had a feeling she knew about what went down last night, but thankfully she didn't say anything in front of Esme, if she had I might've died right there.

Edward came over about fifteen minutes later and grabbed my hand and pulled me up. He had two fishing poles in his other hand and I reached for one. Esme had her camera out so she snapped a few pictures with us smiling, and one of Edward leaning over to kiss me sweetly. We walked off, holding hands, and I could just hear Esme still snapping away, and that pleased me to no end, I wanted tons of pictures of myself and E, I would need them when he went away.

We caught tons of catfish, bringing them back to Carlisle as the day went on so he could clean them and have them ready to cook later. As it started getting later, the sun started going down and the air started cooling off. I shrugged into Edwards navy blue hoodie with an eagle on the front of it as Jazz and Carlisle started a huge bonfire for Esme and Emmett and Tori to sit around.

Edward took me to the tire swing as Carlisle grilled the fish for us and Jazz started cooking baked beans and fixed up some slaw. It was the perfect summer evening, and I could only think of one way for it to end…and E was on the same page with me…

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**A/N: Go! Go! Go review! Teasers if you do!**


	6. We're Diving In, Nothing Left To Lose

A/N: Guys, I know I don't update often, but school is amazingly busy with my second semester starting, but I'm getting this out to you with hopes of as soon as I get five reviews I'll have your next chapter popped out! =) If you love me you'll review...oh and your reviews get an extra long, extra juicy, maybe even a little lemony, teaser!

Disclaimer: S. Meyer owns all the good stuff. I just have an amazing pair of Underarmour sweatpants that are my best friend on snow days. =)

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(BPOV)

I crawled out of bed when I heard Edward's ringtone going off on my phone. My knees hit the floor before I realized that my legs were completely asleep. I reached up to my bedside table trying to find my phone, but my contacts weren't in and it was difficult for me to find it by touch only. I swear if I heard Then by Brad Paisley again I was going to hurl, it had probably played three times through already.

I finally found it as I discovered that my legs could stand again. I flipped it open quickly, but by that time a new ringtone, Thriller by Michael Jackson, which was my voice mail ringtone, had already started playing. I was cussing myself for not getting to the phone quick enough but as I picked up the phone and dialed in my code for my voicemail I smiled as his velvet voice filled the speaker.

"B, this is E just wanting to say good morning to my beautiful. Call me back when you get this. And baby… I love you."

His message was so simple, yet so sweet. I laid my phone on my vanity and walked to the light switch to turn off my fan and to turn on my overhead light. My room was an utter mess, there were birthday gifts still laying on my trunk by my closet door, my bed lay unkempt, and I had clothes laying all over the floor. I grabbed my pair of black rimmed glasses and walked down the hall to the bathroom where I peed and put my contacts in. Surprisingly as I looked in the mirror I realized I didn't look as much like hell as I thought I did. My face was pretty clear and my hair just had a bit of wave to it.

The house was very quiet as I walked back to my room; I had to get ready to see Edward because he was planning on taking me to meet his grandparents for brunch. There was this place in Oxford called the Victorian which was part hotel, part swanky restaurant and Edward's grandfather was taking us there. I was slightly uncomfortable because I knew how Edward felt about his grandparents. Yes, they had money, but Edward's family was not so well off. Mr. and Mrs. Cullen had not talked to Carlisle for many years; they had only recently gotten back in touch with Edward because they wanted contact with the grandsons. I wasn't sure how they were going to react to me being with Edward, with the age difference and all.

I had to pick out something half decent to wear, or I assumed this was supposed to be a nice brunch, so I picked up my phone to call Edward, as I laid out my basic powder and eyeliner that I knew no matter what, I had to put it on.

His phone barely rang twice and then he answered and I could practically hear the smile in his voice.

"Beautiful baby Bella, how is it going?"

"Its excellent love, but I really have a question about this brunch…what is appropriate to wear?"

"Well, I was thinking about some khaki shorts and a polo shirt for myself. If you have a nice skirt, maybe knee length or dress pants, and a dressier shirt that might be nice. Oh, wear nice shoes, my grandmother loves nice shoes."

I laughed; of course he would have to tell me that, so now I have to worry about wearing the wrong shoes. My closet was a complete and utter travesty; there is no way I'll be able to find the perfect pair of shoes in all that before we had to leave at eleven to make our brunch date.

An hour later and several outfits thrown on my bed I was ready, with my black trouser pants, pink and white mottled tank top with lots of detailing on the neck, and my favorite pair of dark pink heels that had been Rose's before she realized that she hated pink. Thank God that was during her phase of dating Royce, he was so rich. Good times, good times.

Edward had pulled up in front of my house; he was in his mother's Tahoe because he was trying to make a decent entry in front of his grandparents. I didn't go to the door; he knew my parents and the sisters were gone so I wasn't worried about him walking in on anything.

My door opened and he actually did walk in on something slightly embarrassing. I had my hair brush in my hand, thinking that I would be able to finish my song by the time he came in my room, but no, all he saw was me singing at the top of my lungs in my dressy outfit, to Tik Tok by Keisha. He looked at me and just laughed and laughed, doubling over as he tried to hide something behind his back.

I threw my hairbrush at him and he ducked so it could go sailing into the wall in the hall behind him. I walked up to him and kissed him with the Keisha song restarting, my favorite part about brushing her teeth with a bottle of Jack came on and I smiled at him as my fingers worked through his hair and our lips met, as if they were hungry.

"Last night was amazing B."

"It was. I'll never cease to be amazed by the way you make me feel."

I reached for his hand but then he jumped back.

"What's your problem?"

"Oh nothing…"

He gave me the puppy dog expression and then pulled a pretty brown box out from behind his back. It was tied with a pretty purple ribbon and I was actually really excited. He hadn't bought me anything yet and I wasn't really sure if we were there yet, but apparently we were and I was super stoked.

"I hope you like it B…"

I pulled the ribbon and took the lid off of the box. It was perfect. I was shocked that he had found something so beautiful that I loved so much. It was a simple gold bracelet with the word inspire engraved on a gold plate that would sit across my wrist.

"I got it for you because you inspire me. You inspire me to want to be better, to want to serve my country, to want to protect you. You're my life now Bella. I live for you. And no matter what happens today with my grandparents, good or bad, it will never change the way I love you B, and I'll always live to be with you."

"Edward…I honestly don't know what to say. I love it."

"Hold onto it B, don't lose it while I'm gone."

"I'll never lose it."

He smiled at me and kissed my lips again as I grabbed my Dior clutch that had been another gift from Royce to Rose that she had passed on to me and then we were out the door and into the Tahoe.

"Are you nervous Edward?"

"Am I that obvious?"

I smiled confidently at him, "What could possibly go wrong? If they didn't care about you then they wouldn't have asked you to lunch. They obviously want to be involved with you. I think it's amazing that you're taking this chance. They want to support your endeavor with our country; they have no reason not to love you or to be proud of you."

"Thanks Bell, I'm still freaking out though. And as soon as this thing is over, I'm taking you somewhere to buy you something nice."

"Edward! You don't need to do that!"

"It'll make me feel better Bella, and plus I just got one of my checks in, it was for a pretty good amount. I put some back in savings, but I defiantly want to be able to buy my favorite girl some stuff before I go back…I may have also ordered you something that just came in…"

"What is it Edward?! Can I see it now?!"

"Now, now Bella, patience is a virtue. It's at home. It'll give you an incentive to be on your best behavior today."

His gentle smile let me know that he was just joking with me and he slid his hand over the console to grasp mine tightly. All kidding aside I knew that he was seriously scared about meeting his grandparents. His family hadn't had contact with them in a while, since the boys were small, and Emmett and Jasper weren't really sure that they wanted to be around them yet. Edward was positive though. I knew how he felt about family. He loved that I was always so close to Rosalie and Alice and even though my parents and I weren't as close as Edward's family was, at least mine were still together, which was something a lot of people couldn't say.

We were at the Victorian in no time, the thirty minute drive felt like twenty with Edward behind the wheel. Giving his mom's car over to the valet people felt awkward, Edward and I most certainly weren't used to being spoiled like that. We looked around in the front of the restaurant, and suddenly a very handsome salt-and-pepper-gray-haired man opened the door for us.

"Edward? Is that you son?"

"Grandfather?"

"Oh, just call me Lawrence; I don't deserve that title yet. Who is this becoming young woman with you?"

"My apologies, this is my beautiful girlfriend, Bella Swan."

"Obliged to meet you, young lady. This is my wife, Katherine."

A beautiful, older, blonde-haired lady stepped out from just behind Lawrence. She was wearing a stunning nude, silk Stella McCartney day-gown with some beautiful pleats and ruffles. She reached her hands out to me and pulled me up close to her, so she could kiss my cheek. She smelled of Chanel No. 5 and I could practically be blinded by her diamond ring and earrings.

"I've waited a long time for this luncheon. Let's go on in, I have a nice table waiting for us."

As we walked through the lobby of the hotel, a hostess led us to a private table in a corner which overlooked a large courtyard/garden. The restaurant was so old-timey and beautiful. It was nothing like I had ever seen in my entire life.

When we ordered lunch, Katherine ordered the Fennel and Orange salad with mint and Lawrence ordered the lobster frittata. I had no idea what I was supposed to order, so I looked to Edward for direction.

He looked at the waitress and very coolly asked, "What do you recommend?"

"Well sir, we have a lovely Bison beef burger or we also have salmon crepes that are simply to die for. So what can I get you?"

"I'll have the burger I suppose, and my girlfriend here will have the crepes."

As the waitress walked out of sight we had a small awkward silence and then Lawrence looked at Edward from across the table.

"Son…well Edward, I've waited a long time to be able to sit here and see you. I've missed having my grandchildren around. You know, Katherine and I, when we broke ties with your father, we never realized how much we were to miss out on. Your brothers and yourself growing up, the pitter-patter of grandchildren's feet, and now, in the future if you decide to wed…"

He looked at me during this brief pause and a red blush crept up my face.

"…then we do not wish to miss out on the blessings of great-grandchildren. I would love to be able to be involved with you and your life Edward, if you would have me."

"Grandfather…I know my parents do not approve of the fact that I'm meeting with you. They expect you to try to buy my affection from them, but that can't happen. I must keep things cordial for a while, but I wouldn't mind a visit, say once every two weeks. Maybe a lunch meeting, I miss having grandparents in my life."

Katherine was tearing up at this point, her small dainty hands crossed in her lap; they shook as she used one to wipe a small tear out of her eye with a handkerchief that Lawrence handed her discreetly under the table.

I reached out and gently patted her hand, this was a very genteel woman and I wanted to get to know her even better. The waitress came by the table to tell us that brunch would be out in about fifteen minutes and if we wanted to take a short stroll in the garden then we could.

It was a warm afternoon so Edward and Lawrence were the only ones that wanted to go for a walk so Katherine and I just made ourselves comfortable at the table.

"Now I saw that you had some fabulous shoes on when we walked in…I don't know if you know this, but shoes are almost my guilty pleasure."

Katherine's southern drawl was beautiful. I couldn't help but smile as I gently lifted the hem of my pants so she could see my shoes more clearly; they were dark pink sling-backs with a pretty scrolled bow on the front and a peep toe.

She smiled at me, she freaking smiled at me, and I went crazy. I loved how it felt to be accepted by yet another member of Edward's family.

"So, Lawrence and I have been thinking on something for a while, he's running it by Edward right now, but I'd like to go on and let you in on it if you would like me to."

"I would love for you to!"

She gave me another broad smile, and then turned toward me slightly.

"Well, as you know very well, with Edward being a part in the Air Force, there are many things that they need as far as donations to keep their tummies full of good food, instead of that horrid army fair, and he'll need comforts of home, and so will lots of the other boys and girls. We want to start a Cullen charity with whatever name Edward decides to grace it with, and start providing simple comforts from home for the boys and girls fighting for our country."

"Wow…I don't know what to say. That's wonderful, I'm sure Edward will love it."

"I just don't want him to think this is us trying to buy his love. We've been thinking on doing in anonymously, but we also wanted his input on what the troops need the most."

"Hopefully he'll see where you two are coming from, I'm sure he'll be pleased."

Soon after that the boys came back just in time from the gardens to see the waitress carrying two full trays of our food. She set them down along with the check, which Lawrence quickly slipped his wallet out and got a card out and handed them both to her.

We settled into a conversation about the charity, Edward had blown up at first when he thought his grandfather was trying to "play" him, but when he realized that it wasn't actually going to be named, "The Edward Cullen Charity", he was perfectly okay with it. He actually thought it was an excellent idea and he had plenty of thoughts about it.

We walked outside after the meal was over and we were walking in the sunshine through the garden before we walked to the valet station.

"Son, have you thought of any names for the charity?"

"Well…I actually have had a few thoughts. How about…Operation Home-Front?"

"Why that name?" Katherine asked in an honestly interested voice.

"Well, see we always have "operations" when we go out, and this is an operation on the home-front, yall are doing good for the soldiers here…but I mean, it's your money, you can always name it."

"We were just thinking something more along the lines of maybe naming it something about your Bella here."

"Really? Like….what?"

"I wasn't sure. Let's stick with Operation Home-Front right now, and then we'll work Bella into it later. We'll need her for PR and things like that while you're away, if that's okay with both of you."

"I would love to help out if Edward agrees to it."

My lovely boyfriend just smiled and nodded his head happily. We were at the valet in a short time after that, their BMW and the Tahoe were parked right beside each other, waiting for us to be off. Hugs and kisses went around, and then suddenly Lawrence popped his head up.

"We must have a charity ball! It'll be this weekend, everyone will come."

"I leave the weekend after that, so yes…if we're going to have an event; it needs to be this weekend."

We were all very excited, exchanging phone numbers and then as Edward was opening the car door for me and Katherine pulled my elbow back toward her.

"Darling, I would like to take you shopping. I know now that you can probably afford all the niceties for a ball, but I would like to provide them for you, at least this once. It's my pleasure."

I smiled and thanked her, letting her know we would be in touch to go shopping one day this week. Edward helped me into the car and I was simply exhausted, his grandparents knew how to make a brunch worth their while.

* * *

(EPOV)

This was a seriously crazy day, it was only two and Bella and I had just arrived back at my house, I was already severely frazzled.

"Baby, Edward, what's the matter?"

"Nothing, well I guess it's just all this new stuff in my life. I was supposed to be home to relax for a month, spending time with you and my family, and now I've got a ball to attend and a charity to help jump-start, and yeah I know it's a really good thing that we're doing, but I just can't help but think about how much work I'll be leaving on your shoulders when I'm gone back to Texas, and then on my mission."

"It's okay E, I really want to help with it. It'll give me an opportunity to feel close to you when you're gone; I'll have something to truly throw myself into instead of missing you."

"And seriously, I've never been to a ball in my entire life. I mean, the closest I've ever been to that is prom…I don't even know what to do about any of this. I love that you want to help me, and I love that my grandparents are trying to be close to me again, but really, I mean I've never been raised that way."

"So…it's the money that bothers you."

"It's the fact that I think they believe they can buy my love."

"I know you're love isn't for sale…you'll just have to prove it to them. Just give them the benefit of the doubt E. Promise me that you'll at least try."

"I'm gonna try."

I hopped out of the Tahoe and walked around quickly to the other side to help B out. She smiled at me as I gave her my hand; I looked down at the ground as she climbed out of the SUV. She took my chin in her hand and forced me to look at her.

"Edward, I love you so much. Don't ever doubt that. I would do anything for you, and I want this as much as you do. This charity will make a difference, I just know."

I laughed at my baby girl; she was so good-hearted and strong. I knew that even though she still wasn't quite sure about my grandparents, she was going to put on a brave front for me and feign comfort around them for my benefit.

Bella all of a sudden pounced on me as we walked into my private back door to my apartment area, and I had to continue with her clinging to me like a spider monkey, covering my neck with teeth marks.

"Baby, what is going on?"

"I need my present."

"Okay, okay, let's go inside and I'll get it."

She hopped off as we crossed through the threshold and I pointed for her to sit on the couch facing away from my room.

"Sit there and you best stay."

"Yes sir." She gave me her best sexy remark with a sultry pout on her lips.

I ducked into my closet, perusing the shelves until I found the right pile of clothes to uncover and got the pretty black box with a big silver bow wrapped around it. She would surely love it.

"B, you want to come see it?"

"Yes sir…can I come now?"

"Now, now, I'm not anybody's daddy, don't call me sir. It's just a little something I got you, I'm bringing it your way."

She was sitting quietly on the couch where I had left her, looking at her palms as she waited on me.

"Bella…"

I approached her quietly, the familiar fear that my stomach had learned to hold onto when I was giving a girl a gift, and I absolutely hated to get rejected. She looked up at me, love was so deep into her eyes that I knew even if she didn't like the gift, never wanted to wear it, and she would still want to be with me, even if I gave her the crappiest gift in the universe.

She took the box from me gingerly, giving me an almost questioning glance as she slipped the big bow off and handed it to me. As she opened the box, she gasped, and suddenly I knew I should have just asked her what she wanted. But then she jumped up and wrapped her arms around my neck.

"I love it Edward, well I love both parts!"

She held up the cherry red silk camisole with gold lace detailing and a matching pair of Chantilly lace shorts (underwear). I knew they were something she could wear even when I wasn't here and I was proud for her to be able to have something so nice, sure I didn't have much money left, just enough to rent a tux for the ball and then to buy her another small something before I left.

"I'm glad you love 'em baby girl. Take care of those too."

"I bet they cost you a fortune Edward, I seriously will. Wanna see me in them?"

"Um…not now okay?"

"Uh…okay? Did I do something wrong Edward?"

"No…it's just I have a lot on my mind and I'm not sure what I need to do."

"Well, I'm always here to listen and I honestly do love the gift E, it's one of the most personal things I've ever received."

"Too personal?"

"Never, Edward, you're my whole heart, what could be too personal for us. And even if it weren't because I loved you, how can I say no to sexy underwear when you're nice enough to sleep with me."

She had a sly grin but I felt like being sweet to her anyway.

"Bella baby, my beautiful angel, you've blessed me enough to even let me be in the same space as you, much less sleep with you. I've very lucky."

She swatted me as she stepped back to put the camisole and underwear back in their box. She then proceeded to lie down on the bed and motion for me to come near her, let's just say we found a sufficient way to finish the afternoon before I took her home.

* * *

(BPOV)

The next morning I literally felt like hell. I silenced my alarm on my phone, which played some piano music that Edward had recorded for me and it was the perfect thing to wake up to.

Stumbling to my mirror wasn't the easiest thing to do in the early dawn hour that I was rudely awakened in, but I knew Katherine would be at my house shortly and if I didn't look proper before she arrived. My eyes looked blood shot from my lack of sleep, I had stayed on the computer late into the morning hours, researching for Edward and Lawrence about what the military needed most and companies that would help donate things to our cause.

So in honor of my three hours of sleep I decided to try to revive myself with a cup of coffee which I started as I walked into the kitchen, and while I waited I went and washed my face off and tried to find my favorite cardigan in the laundry room. My lucky ass dad was still asleep, the police department didn't open until much later and my mom was already off to work. Alice would be waking up in just a few hours so I didn't envy her too much.

I fixed my coffee and then I was ready to head back to my room to attempt at getting myself ready. My appearance wasn't the only problem; I had no idea how I was going to make it through an entire afternoon alone with Edward's grandmother. It was one thing to attend a brunch with my boyfriend and both of his grandparents, but this would be a one on one type deal, and I was basically freaking out.

I decided upon a gray, three tiered, pleated skirt with a black band around the waist. I added a light blue, wrap-front, sleeveless shirt. The only thing missing was a killer pair of shoes and my favorite cardigan. I pulled my closet door open reluctantly, I was almost afraid everything would crash out on top of me like you see in those commercials about the kids that have too many toys. But fortunately nothing of that magnitude happened, I just walked in, stumbling over the clothes that were lying in the middle of the floor and I selected my favorite just plain black cotton cardigan. I then looked down to see what sharp-ass object was sticking in the ball of my foot and I saw the perfect pair of shoes for my outfit, something that Katherine would really appreciate; they were a perfect pair of blue leather Jimmy Choo ballet flats.

Mom had gone through this phase where she got my sisters and me all the things that every southern belle should have. It started off with a hope chest, then we went on to a real string of pearls, then a great pair of diamond studs, an authentic Coach bag, and lastly-an amazing pair of Jimmy Choo's.

Sure, the shoes were practical, but luckily they matched the shirt perfectly and the whole outfit was just amazing together, better than anything I could have planned months in advance. It would be perfect for slipping on and off, and the shoes were great for walking around for long periods of time.

My hair and makeup were really simple as well, I didn't think it would make a great impression to just layer on makeup, no matter how awful I thought I looked. I threw on some powder, a little eyeliner, and a little nude lip gloss, and then I threw my hair into a ballet bun on the top of my head, wrapping a small white silk bow around it.

I heard the door bell ring, ten minutes before Katherine was supposed to be at my house. My stomach was practically eating my backbone because I hadn't even eaten breakfast yet, and I was rushing around my room attempting to straighten things up since I had fooled myself into thinking she would be fashionably late.

I opened the door to a strange, older white man.

"May I help you?"

"Miss Swan?"

"Yes, I'm Bella, what can I do for you?"

"This is Mrs. Cullen's car, she said that she hoped you didn't mind that she was a few moments early, her motto is why be late when you can get an early start. I'll be more than happy to gather your bag or anything else you need and we can be off."

"Just let me grab my purse and turn the lights off and I'll be right out."

He smiled as I shut the door in his face, my breathing quickening as I realized that there was no getting out of this now, no matter how sick I felt at the thought of screwing up everything I had worked so hard for.

In no time at all I was back outside, Katherine's driver opening the door for me, and soon we were off onto the highway.

She had exclaimed over my outfit, especially the shoes and then we had started in on the research I had done for them the night before.

"Now Bella, as much as I do care about this charity, this isn't the time, or the place for work discussions."

"Oh, I'm sorry Mrs. Cullen; sometimes I let things run away with me."

"Oh by all means honey, Katherine! And don't worry; it's wonderful that you're letting Edward's charity take over at least a small part of your life. But I'm just saying that this is a girl's day and I want you to feel like you can relax, or chill, if you will."

Her smile made all my inhibitions melt away, and in no time we were eagerly talking about high school and my future plans, and my hopes for Edward and me after I graduated.

The hour long trip felt ten times shorter when I was chatting with Katherine. The store was still very large and ominous to me…I had never really been to an official gown store, for my junior prom I had just borrowed a dress of Rose's. And as I walked through the racks of huge poufy ball gowns, I became more and more aware of how much I didn't belong in this world.

The price tags were almost as much as my truck on some of them, I just didn't have the money for this and I felt that I should tell Katherine as much.

"Um…Mrs. Ugh, Katherine, I just feel that you should know…I don't exactly have the means to purchase any of these dresses. Maybe I could just…I don't know…borrow someone's prom dress or something."

She looked at me incredulously, "No granddaughter of mine will be wearing a borrowed ball gown."

I gaped at her while she took a moment to realize what she said…

* * *

A/N-Okay guys, I know it's short. But if you read up above, five reviews get the next chapter out, and if you review then you get that juicy teaser. =) So go! Be like Nike and Just Do It!


	7. God Bless the Daylight

**A/N: So guys, I'm really sorry that my story is taking so long. But life is crazy, and I'm sorry to say that this won't be updated regularly, but know that I'm working on it and I always try to get teasers out fast. =) Plus reviews make me want to update! So let's get to it!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight, however I do own a glorious Viva La Vida shirt from a Coldplay concert. =)**

(BPOV)  
Granddaughter. Wow. She just said that. I had to gather my wits so I could pick my jaw up off the ground and talk to her.

"Oh, well if you insist Mrs. Cullen, oh I mean Katherine."

She smiled at me broadly and then stopped at a rack of dresses that were about ankle-length. She selected a beautiful red one with a large pleat down the front and elegant pleated detailing on the bodice. It was perfect and to my surprise, only a hundred dollars.

"I can actually afford that one…would you let me pay for it?"

"If that's what you want. But I expect you to let me accessorize it with you."

"Alright, sounds like a plan."

We shared the rest of the afternoon having lunch at a swanky Italian bistro and picking out a clutch, a pair of high heels, some earrings, and a pretty necklace. She was actually a really amazing inspiring person, using their money to fund non-profit organizations. She even whipped out her iPhone and showed me some of the pictures she had of the boy's right after they were born, before the family fallout happened. I felt really natural around her, especially when we had a talk about the age difference between me and Edward. She actually felt my pain about how people looked down on my relationship because when she was first met Lawrence, he had been 23 and she had been 18. Times surely had been different back then but still people didn't like the age difference.

"Well lovely girl, it's been a fabulous day, but I know you have to go in now…from what I hear my grandson wants to have some fun with you tonight."

"Ha-ha that sounds so crude. But I am going to go in; it's been a long day. Thanks so much for the jewelry and shoes…they really are going to make the dress something special."

"Oh no now, you make anything you wear special. It's the love that radiates from your eyes."

I hugged her as I exited the car that had been in my front yard for at least fifteen minutes because we had been so into our conversation.

* * *

(EPOV)  
I had been waiting patiently all day for Bella to get back home from her shopping excursion with my grandmother. I didn't know how it was going to work out, if they would even get along by themselves-it was very stressful on my part.

I had received the suit that I was supposed to be wearing from Lawrence (aka Gramps); well actually his assistant brought it by. I was just relieved that I would be able to give it back after the charity ball, taking things from them made me feel extremely uncomfortable. And I was used to having to work for everything I received. I mean, that's part of the reason why I joined the military. Sure I was attending college, but I wasn't happy there. I wanted to get out and make something of myself, and make some real cash while I was at it. Joining the military was the best choice I ever made, they were making me into a real man who stood up for himself and the others around him and protected his family. It was a life changing experience, but it means a lot.

My ringtone went off while I was putting together moms new side table for the living room. She had recently bought some new furniture for the house, and Jazz had put some stuff together but he had left one or two more things for me to do while he was out with Tori, shopping for some new clothes.

I grabbed my phone just as "God Love Her" finished up and flipped it open. Bella had just texted me and sent me a beautiful picture of her with her dress pulled on and her long brown hair all curly down around her shoulders. I automatically texted her back.

To: Bella

From: Edward

Beautiful. Just plain beautiful.

Instead of her texting me back, she just proceeded to call me. Her very own ringtone, "God Love Her" rang out again and I picked it up, a smile playing on my lips as I heard her sexy voice.

"So how was the day with Grandmother dear?"

"Screw your grandmother…yeah she's awesome but right now…you need to come here."

"You come here. I'm about to go downstairs…"

"Be there in five or less."

I practically jumped the stairs to the basement and threw everything on my bed. I had been trying to go through some of my clothes so I could take some different stuff back to Texas when I went in a few days.

All of my clothes were thrown rapidly in the closet, I threw my covers back onto my bed as well as I could, but honestly, this was the messiest my room had been since we moved in so I didn't think it was honestly that bad.

Before I even had time to think about it, I turned around rapidly and knocked a few of my CDs out of the CD tower. I leaned over to pick them up and that's when I heard my basement door open.

I looked up and there was Bella, wearing a short baby blue sundress, her beautiful tanned legs gliding towards me as she came down the stairs almost like an angel descending Heaven.

"Bella…"

She didn't say anything, just pressed her pointer finger to her lips and gave me a seductive smile.

The last few steps disappeared between us and B was in front of me, pushing my back to the cool brick wall behind me. Our clothes practically disappeared as her dress flew over her head, my shorts kicked off toward my living room; my shirt was already gone anyway.

She jumped up, wrapping her legs around my waist, my hands automatically going to her butt to hold her there. Her body broke out in chills as I swiftly entered her. We were both so close, the air was so hot and think, the humidity resting on us, clothing us in a layer of sex and sweat.

Our sweat mingled together, our bodies pressing hard against each other, our hips pulling apart, and then crushing back together again. I used my forehead to push Bella's hair back so I could find her ear with my lips.

I tried to steady my harsh breathing as I whispered, "B, I talked to your dad this morning…"

"Don't talk about my dad." Bella breathed out her words, whimpering a little bit.

"But it's important baby."

"Edward…fuck…I'm almost…there. Shut up."

I decided to finish what I was getting and as we climbed into the shower after our sexcapade she laughed and told me that I could bring it up again.

"Well…it's like this Bella…I talked to your dad this morning in Lineville over breakfast. And I asked him a question…"

"Edward, you know my dad doesn't care about our relationship."

"No, it's not that or anything bad. I asked if I could maybe…marry you."

She looked at me, water coursing over her bare body, looking delicious, and smiled at me, suddenly covering me with kisses.

"Edward! Are you proposing to me?!"

"Well…something like that. It's just I didn't know what kind of ring you wanted…but see Esme said that I could have hers…if you wanted it."

"Edward, I've seen Esme's ring. It's beautiful. I would love to have it."

We climbed out of the shower, after drying me; I took my time lovingly drying all of her beautiful parts.

I left her in my bathroom to dry her hair as I searched my bedside table for the ring box Carlisle had given me before he left for the road again.

Aha! There it is, a pretty little red velvet box, I opened it just to make sure the family heirloom was still tucked inside. It was a vintage ring, passed down through at least three generations. It had a beautiful center diamond, with several on the sides; inside there was now an engraved word, _forever. _

I sat it on the table as I pulled a pair of black boxers on and topped them with a pair of gray mesh shorts. Then I slipped the ring box into my pocket for when she got out of the bathroom.

She walked toward me, a vision in her sundress again, with her hair still slightly damp and tangled in curls all down around her shoulders. A slight smile played about her lips and I couldn't help but return it. She walked calmly up to me and placed a chaste kiss on my lips. I slid my hands up from her neck to her cheeks and kissed her again harder. I decided to pull away; I wanted that ring on her finger more than anything.

I dropped to my knee as she slid down onto the bed; this moment was all too surreal for me, it was unlike anything I'd ever imagined before. Never in my life had I thought I would be right here right now proposing to my girlfriend, who was only seventeen. Never in a million years would I have thought that Charlie would have even allowed it, but I did assure him that I would wait until she was eighteen to marry her, and that if she ever wanted an out that it would always be there for her, I just wanted my ring on her finger to let everyone know that she was my precious angel.

I looked into her eyes; they were glistening with tears, one slowly rolling down her cheek, almost at the crook of her smile and I took my thumb and wiped it away gently, pressing my lips to her cheek and whispering into her ear that I loved her more than anything in the world.

I took her hand into my own, slipping the velvet box out of my pocket with my other hand. I looked down at her beautiful fingers, rubbing my forefinger and thumb up and down her ring finger, feeling the soft skin under my own slightly rough skin. Then, looking into her eyes, which were practically portals to her soul, I kissed her hand softly and pulled myself back.

"Bella…I need to know, officially. Will you be mine…for forever?"

She broke out into a huge grin, tears pouring out of her eyes at a rapid pace, she leaned down to kiss me.

"Yes, Edward! Of course I'll be yours for forever and for eternity! I love you Edward Anthony."

I slid the ring on her finger and barely giving her time to get a good glance at it, I stood quickly, pulling her up with me, and swinging her around the room. This was the happiest moment of my life, and yeah she could admire the ring in a minute, but gravity sucked, and my Bella was so light and I just wanted to look into her eyes and feel this moment.

As I sat her down, because obviously it was inevitable, we could only spin for so long or one of us would get sick (and when I say one of us, I mean me), I touched her cheeks with both of my hands and kissed her again.

"Shouldn't your parents be looking for us or something?"

"Dad's out on the road, mom's at my aunt's house, staying with her to watch her three little kids since her husband's a trucker too."

"What do they think about all of this?"

"Well…obviously they thought it was too early. But I reassured Dad that it would be a long time before we actually got married, this was just a way to prove my devotion and so that we would both know we had each other for forever. But apparently they came around because you have that ring on your finger. Esme said that when the time came, you could have the wedding band also, Dad said he owed her something new anyway."

"And what did my dad say…?"

I thought about my answer to this question as I saw her fingering her new ring, a loving look in her eyes. I decided the truth would be the best option.

"Bella, I have to tell you. It wasn't easy at all. Charlie didn't like it, and Renee wasn't very happy either. But I reassured them just as I assured my own parents, and Charlie began to see my point of view, that we are good for each other and that we love each other very much. They were all in after I told them that we would not wed until at least you were of age eighteen. I know, before you say anything, I know that is a long time, but I know it's important for us both to finish school-for you, and for me to finish my assignments, and I may still have to go over-seas. Who knows what the future holds for us, all I know it that I want to spend my life with you. I want to spend every second with you, but even though I know I won't be able to, my ring will be there, on your finger signifying that I'm always with you, and I'll always return to you and only you. I love you baby girl."

Bella was no longer looking at her ring. She was staring at me with a dumbstruck expression on her face.

"Bella baby, what's wrong?"

"Those were beautiful words Edward…I just wish I had some equally beautiful words to give you back."

I took her face in my hands again, feeling the tears prickling at the back of my eyes. I knew that yes, I was still practically dating a child, but her answer was so innocent. Her wants were so precious.

"You don't owe me any words, because every word you say is perfect and beautiful. I could look at you in silence and still be happy. Now let's go see your parents, let's stay in this moment."

"Ha…maybe I could tell people about my new fiancé and his hot ivory shaft…"

"Are you seriously comparing me to Jim Morrison? Last time I checked I wasn't exactly a rock-god."

She shot me a look and I had to smile at her.

"You rock me…therefore you can be my rock-god."

I ruffled her hair as I pushed her softly towards the stairs, "silly Bella, this is just one of the many reasons why I love you."

* * *

(BPOV)

Engaged. It's such a heavy word. Okay, maybe not as final as married, but still pretty intense. I just couldn't believe Edward had asked. Over that, I couldn't believe my parents said yes to him, and that Esme had given me her engagement ring. It was…so overwhelming. Edward and I had come to see my parents, and then we had met Tori and Jazz, Rose and Adam, and Alice and even Emmett at a restaurant in Oxford. We celebrated over a Hitachi table at a Japanese steak house. It was a lovely celebration, and afterwards Edward and I headed back to my house to watch Dear John and then he left, after carrying me to my room, worn out from the day.

I wrote in my journal and then I lay in the dark, looking out my window at the big bright moon. This day was everything I should've wanted, right? I was supposed to be in love with Edward. So why did I keep thinking about my future and feeling as if I had lost it. It was nothing like that, and I felt silly for believing that. I just needed to stick with it, and wait and see how it felt.

Honestly, I knew inside that everything would be okay between Edward and I. He wasn't forcing me into marriage or anything like that, and he told me I would always be able to get out if I wanted to. I knew that he didn't want to tie me down, he loved me.

I rolled over, pulling my blinds down so the room would plunge into pitch black darkness. I drifted off to sleep with thoughts of a beautiful wedding, walking down the aisle on Charlie's arm in a beautiful dress, then babies, raising them in a big southern plantation-style house with horses in the front yard and Edward coming home from work everyday and playing with the children outside. It would be a beautiful life…

* * *

(EPOV)

Sleep that night was going to be hard to come by, I could already feel it as I drove away from Bella's house. She had been almost asleep when I laid her in her bed and kissed her goodnight. I was afraid that she would start second-guessing our relationship, but she seemed so confident in me and our relationship and everything else. I was so proud of her for being very mature, she was just what I needed. But the innocence she radiated…it kept me grounded, it made me realize how good waiting was for us, how much time she would have to grow up, and for us to grow in our relationship. I never doubted-not for a second- I would always love her, no matter what.

I was about to turn into my driveway, but I realized, I didn't want to go home, so I drove. I just kept driving; I drove into Lineville and met my friend Embry. We hung out at his house; his friends were all there drinking and listening to music, even a few of them were smoking it up in a bedroom. I knew this was where I didn't belong, but I just needed to release and relax for a little while.

With my red Dixie cup in hand, I decided to chill on a ratty old couch in Embry's living room. There were random girls all around me, I felt Leah, Seth's sister, come up and place her hand next to my crotch, and somewhere in the back of my mind I knew it was wrong so I pulled away.

"Edward, what the fuck is wrong with you?"

I stared at her numbly. I was in love. I needed to be at home, resting. I had to be ready to spend my next few days working on the charity, and filling them with fun with my fiancé, so I threw my cup in the trashcan as I walked out the door.

The door to the trailer slammed behind me, rattling off its hinges, and soon I heard footsteps behind me.

"What the fuck are you doing here Cullen?"

I turned around to face Jacob Black, Bella's best guy friend.

"Nothing Jacob, I'm not doing anything here. I was just leaving."

"Bella texted me and told me about yall two. Why aren't you with her…or at least answer me, why are you here."

"Jacob…if I talk to you, it has to be off the record. I have to be able to tell you this in confidence that you won't go report this to Bella."

"I won't tell Bella unless I think it would save her heartache. So spill it Cullen."

We walked toward my beater of a truck and both ended up sitting on the back, legs stretched out; popping the top off of a Bud-Light that Jacob had scored from a cooler sitting on the ground outside.

"Well Black…here's the deal. I love Bella, she's my life. I would feel so completely empty without her. But tonight after proposing and celebrating with our siblings, I just had this overwhelming feeling that I was taking away her future. I kept going over the what-if's in my mind, what if she wants to go to college and see other guys, and what if she doesn't get to do that because she's got my ring on her finger. What if she doesn't take the out that I'm giving her if she wants it, because she's afraid of hurting me, or leaving a soldier? I know guys who have been through that and came back to girls that had cheated on them and hurt a lot more people in the end, than they would've if they had just waited on getting married till the tour was over."

Jacob looked at me with his deep soulful eyes that no seventeen year old should have, and maybe it was just because they were glazed over from his alcohol consumption, but I felt as if he could see right through me.

"Edward, I'm going to say this once, so listen good."

I nodded carefully, preparing to soak in what was coming my way.

"Cullen, Bella is my best friend in the entire universe and I would never want you to hurt her. I feel like you are the best thing for her at this point in time, and I feel that the ring that is on her finger now is exactly what she needs. Sometimes at school and around her family, B feels as if she just sort of disappears in the crowd. And even though both you and I know that isn't true, you make B feel special. She mentions that to me all the time, how you make her feel. Even before when I took her to the prom, she talked constantly about your latest Skype date, and I have to admit, I was way jealous of your relationship with her. I really thought she deserved better, someone who could always be there for her, but now I know that isn't the case. You give her something to look forward to. If Bella wants to get rid of you then she will. She won't worry about hurting your feelings. She always knows to do what is right for her. So give her the benefit of the doubt and just feel with her. Tell her about your reactions to the things you do and let her answer your doubts. Don't drown your fears in a sea of whiskey or beer. Just be with her and love her."

I looked at Jacob with new found appreciation for him.

"Thanks Jacob, I really appreciate you talking to me about this. It's something I needed."

"Anytime Edward, oh and one last thing."

"What's that Black?"

"If you ever hurt her, I will kill you. And don't doubt that, because do you see all these people around here? I'm not just a one-man-wolf-pack."

I laughed at the reference to the movie "The Hang-Over" that had come out on DVD at the first of the year, it was pretty funny, but I knew Jake was serious; he protected his best friend with everything he had.

We smiled at each other and with a slight nod and a handshake that turned into a hug; I was into my truck and back into the direction of home. Checking my phone I saw that it was nearing one A.M. and Esme would probably be pretty upset, if she had been home. Thank God for my aunt.

I pulled into the driveway just as Tori was pulling out, she waved through her darkly tinted windows and I pulled into my parking spot by the basement. As I opened the door, I realized my TV was on and I saw Emmett sprawled out on my couch watching some movie.

"Whatcha doing bro?"

"Not much…watching Fast and Furious."

"Digging out the old ones aren't you?"

"You know it."

"Any reason why you're in my room?"

"Tori and Jazz were being…loud."

I grinned at him, knowing just what would get him to run up the stairs like a bat out of hell.

"Well you know something, me and Bella were being "loud" the other night down here…right about where you were sitting too."

"Ew! You are nasty man. I gotta go."

"Sweet dreams."

"Right, nasty."

If he only knew how un-nasty being with Bella was. She was like the sweetest candy in the world; her taste was unlike anything I'd ever had before. Every time a bit of her was in my mouth, I was waiting for it to melt into my tongue.

I turned off the TV and took the DVD out, placing it back in it's case and back onto the shelf. My OCD was defiantly taking over as I straightened up the pillows on the couch and finally made one last sweep around the room, collecting Bella's runaway thong from the other night and placing it on a picture of us from the lake that my mom had taken and gotten framed for me.

As I turned down the covers of my bed, preparing to go shower to get the stench of sweat and beer, I realized how much I wished Bella could have been there with me. Despite my worries, I loved Bella and I always wanted her by my side. With less than one week left before my return to Texas, and my one month exile, I was needing her more and more. Planning what to take on my trip wasn't easy. I had my one personal bag, which I knew would hold a few books, a journal, and several pictures of my Bella baby.

The shower water coursed over me, taking away all the worry of the day, spiraling down the drain along with the smell of the beer and sweat and everything else that had dirtied me up during the day. I painstakingly dried off again, and climbed into my cool bed wearing only a clean pair of baby blue boxers. The last thing I thought of before I drifted off to sleep, was how they were the same color as her amazing sundress and how I couldn't wait to see my Bella again. I was too busy thinking and too sleepy however, to hear the slight buzz of the vibration of my phone…


	8. Do You Have To Let It Linger?

**A/N: Okay...I'm not here to offer any excuses....other than my severe writers block. =( But it's here now! If you would, I'd love it if any of you will Rec this story because it really motivates me to write more when I have people reading and reviewing! Oh, and just so everyone knows...this story does have some realism to it, the guy I'm talking to...this is the story of him and myself, he's in San Antonio on Lackland Air Force Base, so I'm really missing him, at least I have my writing to keep me warm at night. =)**

**Notice: It's all hers...sadly, I have nothing, but a crappy cold. **

* * *

(EPOV)

"Shit."

Bella had called me in the middle of the night, left me a voicemail saying that she needed me, and now I was screwed. Like, big time screwed.

Apparently things had fallen apart during the late afternoon with the venue and my grandmother had called Bella in a panic in order to find a venue large enough to hold at least two hundred people.

Luckily by the time I got back to Bella, she had called her best friend Jacob, who just happened to be the nephew of the coach at Bella's high school and he offered us the gym and all the tables and chairs, not to mention the stage area that he even offered to get set up for us.

I heard my brothers moving around upstairs and I glanced at my alarm clock.

_Damn it. _

There must be something when this summer heat, all the sex, and the brightness of the sun baking down on me must be making me sleep harder or something. It was after lunch and I knew that Bella must be simply freaking out.

She had reassured me on the phone that she was doing okay, but I knew she needed me at the gym as soon as possible, dressed and ready to great the people that were setting up and then later, guests.

I showered and then pulled on just a pair of boxers and sweatpants, padding upstairs in my bare feet toward the smell of grilled cheese. I just knew I would find Tori standing up by the stove, flipping them and holding out a plate for either Jazz or Emmett.

But wow, was I way off base. My grandfather, Lawrence was standing there juggling a pot of something soupy and then trying to flip several grilled cheeses in another pan.

"Well hello there sleeping beauty, how was your slumber?"

I grinned at him, grabbing several plates and bowls out of the cabinet, sitting them next to the stove. This was just the typical grandfather thing I wanted to see. He poured what I found to be tomato soup into the bowls as I finished cooking the grilled cheeses and setting them on the plates.

Emmett and Jazz walked in from outside, sweat showing on their brows and on the backs of their tee shirts. I automatically assumed they had been working in the chicken houses with my dad, so that everything would be running smoothly as to not interrupt the big shindig that night.

Lunch went well, and after cleaning up with Lawrence we sent Em, Dad, and Jazz to clean them up and get dressed. Lawrence was excellent at tying ties and helping smooth out collars and such. He even averted a big crisis when Emmett's pants were too long. A bit of fabric tape from my mom's sewing room and bravo, we were all ready to go.

We all walked outside to where Lawrence's car waited on us, and his big hand pressed to my shoulder.

"I am so proud of you Edward. Proud of you for serving this country, and most of all, proud of you for trusting me enough to forgive me of my mistakes."

I turned and hugged him hard, tears welling up in my eyes showing the love that I had held in my heart for so long and now it was practically spewing over. We embraced for the longest time, just standing there, taking in all the comfort from each other's arms. The hallmark moment was cut short by Emmett bounding up into the front seat and beeping the horn.

We heard my dad reprimanding him from his place in the back, only to hear Emmett retort, "I just had to check to see if it made the Duke's of Hazzard song. Jasper said it would sound just like the General!"

We all laughed and Gramps and I settled into the front seat of the luxury car.

The ride was only fifteen minutes and it was pleasurable enough, but not as pleasurable as what I held in my arms the minute I stepped into the gym.

"EDWARD!!"

I heard my name clear across the giant gym and took in my beutiful girl as she ran without abandon towards me.

"Edward, I missed you so much! We have a ton of stuff to get done…tables to be set up, the caterer needs help, and I still have like twenty bazillion napkins to fold…"

We worked for two or three straight hours, sometimes beside each other-our hands brushing occasionally, other times across the room from each other-casting sly glances and winking at one another.

Around five thirty Bella disappeared and I was practically running around like a meth-head, trying to memorize my opening speech and making sure I still looked decent after all the manual labor I'd put in.

Gramps nudged my shoulder as I stood up from adjusting the bottom of a table cloth.

"Look over there, son…."

When I looked up, my breath caught in my throat. I took in my angel in all her red glory; it took everything I had not to rush up to her and ravage her against the red and black brick walls. I was practically hard just at the thought of the soft silk under my fingers combined with our hot skin and the cold bricks and the idea of me pressing her tight ass against the hard brick…God I was turning into such a pervert. Maybe I was…after all, I'm a twenty-three year old who is dating a young seventeen year old. But Bella wasn't naïve. She was so grown up, and she knew what she wanted, plus she knew all the lyrics to "I'm On a Boat". How could I not fall in love with that girl? She was pure perfection. She loved me and was willing to wait for me, willing to do whatever it took, even if I chose to have a permanent military career. I wanted her to be my wife-the ring her fingered displayed was evidence of as much.

I didn't go directly to her, we went to alternate doorways to greet guests and I glanced over only to find her meeting my eyes, only fleetingly. Too soon she had leaned down to kiss a short elderly lady on the cheek. I had no doubts that we would make it, yes, we would be okay.

* * *

As the night wore on, I saw little of her. During my welcome speech she helped me through a difficult patch and then we were both mingling for the rest of the time.

I was speaking to one of Lawrence's poker friends and he motioned to Bella, asking me about that "feisty little red devil."

"Oh yes sir, that's my Bella."

Lawrence grinned at me very uncomfortably as his friend told me how I should have gotten her into something a little shorter for the occasion.

As it turned out, I didn't need to pimp out my girlfriend to the boys back out at the retirement home in order to turn a profit for my charity. We ended up making over $150,000 alone on donations, not to mention ticket sales and a silent auction that would follow at my grandparent's estate the next morning.

The last people walked out the door, and Lawrence told Jazz and Emmett to help the caterer load up, and I saw Bella sitting in a chair, drinking an abandoned glass of red wine.

"Was it that bad?"

She jumped at the sound of my voice but then settled as I rested my hands on her bare shoulders.

"The speech? Oh yeah, E…I have been nursing this glass since I had to listen to that."

I leaned down and bit her shoulder and she calmly put her glass down on the table beside her.

"Is that what I get for making fun of you?"

"Yup", I said, popping my _p_. "And if you let me take you home, there's a lot more where that came from."

She giggled and kissed me. That kiss…God she knew just what to do to me. It felt like the first time all over again, in my basement, laying eyes on each other for the first time with this new relationship between us.

I cradled her against my chest, just standing there. I never wanted to leave her, but I knew the military was my calling. I had one last present I wanted to give her, but I had to wait, I wanted to give them to her last minute at the airport.

The night was Bella was amazing. We didn't have hot, sweaty, raunchy sex. No, we made sweet, slow love in the dark in my cool basement. The bright southern moonlight washed over her bare shoulders as she leaned over me, placing chaste kisses down my neck and shoulder.

* * *

I had never though a girl could be more beautiful when she slept. i knew that I wanted to wait to give my present to her, but her breathing made her chest rise and fall, and the glistening sweat along her cleavage….I just had to do it now.

I reached into the drawer beside my bed and felt around for the plain white box. It jingled in my hand and I opened the box, taking the cool chain in my hand and then returning the box back to the drawer. My fingers shook as I brushed her hair away from her soft neck. I gently slipped the chain around her neck, and then smiled as it fell between her breasts.

About an hour later, I heard Bella move in the bedroom. I had been organizing a file for my dad and having some coffee in the living room area.

"Edward, are these you're…tags?"

I turned around to see her holding them up between her fingers, her red boy shorts standing out against her otherwise naked body.

"Yeah beautiful, do you like them?"  
She smiled at me, beamed at me. She held them up triumphantly in her hand and then kissed them before turning around and walking away. Minutes later she appeared again wearing my white button up from last night. She settled into the crook of my arm and placed her ankles across my legs. It was so simple, me there marking words on the file, her settling into me, stealing my coffee mug out of my hand. That was how I wanted to spend the rest of the days of my life.

"When do you leave?"

"Too soon."

"No baby, really when do you leave?"

"Five hours…"

She frowned and leaned into my chest, fingering my tags that hung around her neck.

"Don't you need these? I mean, won't you get in trouble?"

"No baby, I'll get a new set when I head out on my mission anyway."

I took her chin into my hand and turned it up toward me.

"I would never leave you if I didn't have to."

"Edward, don't be silly. I know you have to leave."

"But baby girl…all I want to do is be with you and serve my country, and at the same time…just not disappoint anyone."

* * *

(BPOV)

I could tell he was really struggling to get it all out. This had to be difficult for him…but what I didn't need him to know was how hard this was for me. I was determined to be strong for him. I couldn't let him see how broken I would be when he left me. As Edward choked on the words that should've left his mouth proudly, I pressed my lips to his, silencing him like only I could. I set the mug and the file aside and threw my leg over Edward's lap. As we undressed each other, eagerly devouring each other's mouths and skin, I noticed there was urgency about the way we touched, and I saw the fear in his eyes and to tell the truth…it really freaked me the fuck out.

After we finished I lay up against his chest, sweat cloaking us both. The humidity was horrible so showered together and then I laid on the bed in my underwear as Edward finished packing.

* * *

(EPOV)

As much as it pained me, I slipped my t-shirt and shorts I had been wearing into my dirty clothes hamper and then I put on my fatigues with a heavy heart. I made sure my hair-or lack thereof-looked okay and then I adjusted my boots one last time. Bella was sitting on my bed; her white eyelet summer dress gave her an ethereal glow, her hands skimmed her neck, reaching for the chain, clasping my tags between her shaking fingers.

I lifted my duffle to my shoulder and she looked up at me slowly, as if she was taking me all in. I reached out my hand to her, and she slipped her feet into her dainty little moccasins as she took my hand and we ascended the stairs together.

* * *

(BPOV)

The next few moments went by too rapidly, and I felt as if I was standing in the middle of a blender, my whole world getting shaken up.

Edward was shaking his dad's hand, hugging Emmett and Tori, shaking Jazz's hand-which turned into a teary hug, and then he held a sobbing Esme. His grandparents had already left after telling him goodbye, wishing him luck on his mission, and letting him know the charity would be well cared for in his absence.

Esme pulled herself together just as I turned away to look out over the runway. I felt Edward's strong arms wrap around me and I just felt so complete. I rested my head back on his shoulder and he leaned in to kiss my forehead.

"Bella…my gorgeous baby girl…I don't know what to say…"

I turned toward him, my breath catching in my throat as I breathed in his delicious scent. He leaned in close to my ear and whispered how much he loved me and how we would talk as soon as he landed. Our lips pressed together, our foreheads touching, and then kissing one more time.

"Last call for all flights boarding for San Antonio."

"That's you…"

Our hands clenched together, and then he released, slung his carryon bag over his shoulder, and then walked toward the door to board the plane.

I blew him a kiss, he caught it, and then just like that…he was gone.


	9. We're Only Human, Here

**Disclaimer: I do not, and never will own Twlight. I do however, own a bruised heart. =(**

**A/N: Guys, I just want yall to all know that this story has true parts in it. The story line is based on my life, so the reason why parts of this are taking longer to write, is because I'm waiting for things to happen! But I've got a lot to write about now, so be prepared! Also, Operation Homefront is a real organization, that I am not affliated with! Thanks again! Review please!

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Fourth of July:

(BPOV)

Everyone around me was having a ball. Charlie, Renee', Alice, Rose, Dexter, and Adam had all joined Esme, Carlisle, Emmett, Jasper, Tori, and myself by the lake that Edward and I had once spent an amazing evening by. We had grilled out, juicy hamburgers and hotdogs, tofu-dogs for Tori. Esme had set up a sheet and then she had played a slideshow of pictures of the boys from when they were younger, and she had even teamed up with Renee' to gather pictures of us girls. It was really touching.

All the men were out in the field, lighting fireworks and watching them soar up toward the heavens and burst into a rainbow of colors. The women were gathered in camping chairs under a large white oak tree joking, telling stories, and just laughing and laughing and laughing. It was just one of those family moments, the ones that you see on the pages of Good Housekeeping, and you read between the paperback covers of those sweet novellas.

Tori crept around with my digital camera, documenting every single moment, taking constant snapshots as the day and evening wore on. She was helping me, taking tons of photographs of every single occasion that went on while Edward was gone, so that I could piece together a scrapbook for Edward, so it would be almost as if he was here with us.

He still had not been sent on his month-long mission, which were both a blessing and a curse. It was a blessing because I still got to talk to him every day, but yet a curse because he was in a waiting period and no one would tell him why.

"What's wrong Bella?"

Just as I turned, I heard the camera snap and a bright flash, like an atomic bomb filled my eyes. Tori had caught me sitting at the end of the dock, my bare feet treading the water, as I reminisced about times gone by, the times Edward and I had spent time here alone and with his family, as well as the nights we spent tangled in his sheets, making love for hours and hours on end, the summer heat reminding me of the way that the humidity had cloaked us, as well as the sweat.

"Oh nothing Tori, I guess I'm just missing Edward, that's all."

She walked down the narrow dock and leaned down to hug me, dropping my camera into my lap. By some form of magic, it didn't tumble into the dark water. I looked at its shiny blue outside, and internally smiled, thinking of all the wonderful memories that were documented on the inside.

"I'll get it back from you in a little while, but I thought you might enjoy looking at the pictures of tonight."

She kissed the top of my head and walked off to join the women who were now brewing coffee and munching on homemade donuts while they gossiped and shared stories of childrearing and made plans for the remainder of the summer.

I started going through in the images, there were several of us setting up the tables and chairs and the grill, even a few of Alice trying her hand at building the fire pit. There were others, ones of Esme and Carlisle embracing under a tree and some of Renee' pointing her finger at Charlie as she spotted him stealing a cookie from a Tupperware container. Then there were the ones that I had taken; Jazz spinning Tori in the tire swing, my sisters teasing Emmett as he flexed his arm muscle, my brother in law Adam, holding Dexter up in the air. Those pictures gave way to ones taken later, as the sun went down, some made me laugh, and others were sweet or simple. The last picture on my card was the surprise the one that Tori had taken of me. I had almost a haunted look in my eyes. You could tell how sad I was, the message was plain in my eyes; I missed Edward.

On the outside, I appeared to be happy. I really honestly did try. My chores around the house were never undone, I spent equal time between Edward's family and mine, and I even picked up a part-time job at a local coffee house to earn a little bit of extra cash. In fact, had Edward been here with me, everything would have been perfect.

I looked back at my family and saw Emmett racing toward me, full tilt.

"Bells! Come on! It' time for sparklers and then the big finale!"

I hopped up; slipping my camera into my pocket, making sure it was secure in my blue-jean shorts. Em slipped his hand into mine, and for the first time since Edward had left, as I took off running toward the fire, I felt completely carefree.

July Fourth (EPOV)

My buddies and I had decided to go to a bar for drinks to celebrate the holiday, actually let me rephrase that, I was more than willing to sit on my ass at the barracks and surf FaceBook all damned night, but my friends had other plans for me.

As I sat and stared down into my mug of Budweiser I realized that all of my buddies were off playing pool and talking to girls and I didn't have it in me to do either one. I took a swig and glanced down the bar beside me, a long-legged blonde was sitting down on a bar stool, acting bored, swishing her martini around and glancing up every few seconds to glance over at my friend Sam. Personally, I was tired of it all, all I really wanted to do was catch a red-eye flight back to Birmingham and hire a car to drive me all night back into Barfield.

"Hey…Cullen, is it? Do you need anything else; a shot, a girl…a guy?"

The old gray-headed bartender chuckled as he read my name on my fatigues and made his suggestions, to ease me out of my boredom.

"What's your first name, son?"

I sighed; I guess I would have to talk to him after all.

"The name is Edward. Can I get that shot you were talking about earlier?"

He gave me a solemn smile.

"Now…are you sure about that son?"

I just looked down; I honestly just wanted to forget about everything. The news I had gotten today had shaken me to my core. I wanted to just be with Bella so badly, but even I wasn't sure how she would take the news. She had always been so proud of me, trusted me, believed in me and everything I wanted to do, yet I still felt as if I wasn't ready to reveal my newest secret to her. My military career had been the very thing that had brought us together, and now it could be the very thing that tore us apart.

"I know this is typical…but let's talk."

He poured himself some milk and I nodded yes when he asked me if I'd like some too. Just slap a cowboy hat on me and call me Kenney Chesney.

It was getting late and most of my friends had stumbled out of the bar, either in groups back to the barracks or with female company to a local hotel or maybe her apartment, if they were lucky.

The bartender and I sat in silence for a few moments before he broke the stillness with his husky voice, full of questions.

"So…where's the lucky young lady at?"

"Lineville…Lineville, Alabama."

"That's a long way away. Near the Talladega racetrack correct?"

"Yes sir…about an hour away."

"Well, well. How come you didn't get a leave?"

I told him about my circumstances, how I was on a waiting period…well how I was on a waiting period, up until this afternoon.

"You got your mission today?"

"I wish, I took my night vision test today…and I failed, so no more Special Forces for me."

We talked for a while about Bella and then about his wife and we even talked a little on his ex military career, how he was into Special Forces as well.

As the sun rose on the fifth, he offered his final piece of advice, "See son, here is my take on it. You call your girl, if she loves you, she'll support you no matter what. Take my advice and go on and bite the bullet and tell her. If she's not behind you then she hasn't been the woman you need anyway."

I thanked him and offered to pay, but he waved me on out, offering one last smile before turning to wipe the bar down and beginning to close up shop, as I headed back to the barracks, my heart a bit lighter than when I first walked out my door the night before.

I grabbed some quarters off of my bedside table and headed toward the pay phone in the lobby of the barracks. I dialed my Bella's cell phone number without thinking twice about the early hour or anything else, only how I couldn't wait to hear her perfect voice. Now only if I could see her beautiful face as well…

(BPOV)

I rolled over at the sound of Edward's ringtone…

//There goes my hero//

//Watch him as he walks away//

//There goes my hero//

//He's ordinary//

"Hello?"

"Hey beautiful, on a scale from one to ten, ten being the most, how angry are you with me for calling you this early? Oh, oh shit babe, I bet you didn't get in till late."

"Oh, no love, you're fine. I didn't even stay out late. To be honest…I've actually been asleep in your bed."

"Aw, my baby girl…I wish I was there with you…although I can't promise we would've gotten much sleeping done. Damn it, now I'm kinda smiling. Anyway, may I ask you a question, honey?"

(EPOV)

She said sure in her sexy, sleepy, southern twang, and I asked her how much she loved me.

"A lot babe…what happened? What's wrong?"

My girl, she knew me all too well. So I told her, as gently as I could, I told her everything, emptying my heart. I told her how I failed my test and how I had been kicked out of special forces, after giving them eight of the hardest weeks of my life…how it was on a technicality and there was nothing I could do about it. I told her how I was terrified of how she would react, and how thankful I was for her, despite how she felt about the situation, and I explained how much she meant to me, how much I counted on her for her support, how I loved her. And of course my Bella, she utterly surprised me.

"So what's our next step?"

"Pardon me?"

"What do you do now, like military wise, and what can I do to help you? Are the releasing you or giving you a new job, what's the next step?"

After about fifteen minutes of discussing how I wasn't sure what would my next step, and five minutes of "I miss you's" and "I love you's" , we said our goodbyes and I was finally able to sink down under my new comforter and drift off into an uninterrupted sleep.

(BPOV)

When I woke up the next morning, I smelled Edward all around me. Esme had asked me to stay over and I had quickly agreed, wrapping myself up in my cherry red cami set, and into Edward's covers. I was happier than sad when E called me, although I knew his heart just had to be breaking when he told me the news; I knew how much the military meant to him, especially the Special Forces. Hearing his smooth, velvety voice over the line was just wonderful, although it was a bit obscured by a little line static, but none of that mattered, as long as my love was on the other end. None of that mattered however, talking to him made me miss him even more, and after we said our goodbyes I dampened his pillow with my hot tears…I just missed my soldier so much, and he had wanted to do so much for his country and now he couldn't do anything like he wanted to. All of his plans had changed…and he still had to devote eight years to something he wasn't even sure he wanted, after all he had signed up for Special Forces, not office detail.

Tori must have heard me moving around in the bed, she walked over from E's couch, wiping sleep from the corners of her eyes, and trying to stifle a yawn, as she carefully inched her way through the clothes that I had brought over and the other miscellaneous items I had strewn across my anal-Edward's otherwise clean room.

"Hey Bella, how'd you sleep? I heard you on the phone earlier this morning?"

"Oh yeah…that…um E called, he told me some stuff. I think I just miss him, and I'm sorry you had to hear all that…sometimes I just get a little overwhelmed and I let loose, forgetting everyone and everything."

Tori didn't say anything, just walked over to E's bed and climbed up, wrapping her arms around me as I let a flood of tears loose. Boy…it sure was gonna be a hard next few months.

(BPOV)

The next few days went by in a blur, Charlie's birthday came around and I managed to wrangle up a delicious banana-cream-pie, his favorite, and we had a bit of a family get together. I even put together the music for the evening, just like I used to. I did have a way with pleasing everyone's tastes.

In addition to spending time with my family, I spent a lot of time with Tori. My place of employment was literally steps away from the pizza parlor where she worked. We would rent movies with the Cullen's, or go hit up the thrift stores on Saturday mornings. And I had even worked my way into the hearts of Jasper and Emmett, I even felt as if Em and I had some sort of strange bond going on, he was interesting and even cool at times.

---Girl's Shopping Day—

"Oh Tori, that looks fabulous on you!"

"Thanks Bells, what do you think Esme?"

"Victoria, my dear…that dress, Jasper would love that on you, and for five dollars, you must get it, it's such a steal."

Tori spun around the dressing room of the Center of Hope thrift store in a sunny yellow eyelet summer dress. It cinched tight at her waist and made her look tanned and sexy, perfect for the romantic picnic Jasper had planned for her.

It was their one year anniversary and Jazz had pled with me to help him plan all the romantic stuff, but surprisingly he'd done the majority of the work himself, he made me very proud.

In all actuality I was happy to have all these small, side projects to occupy my time. Between work and chores around the house, I still managed to babysit for Peter and Charlotte when they needed me, and to work nightly on Operation Homefront. I stayed with Esme quite a bit, still helping her clean, decorate, and fix up the house one small thing at a time, and in return she helped me put together care packages for Edward.

The whole Operation Homefront had really been taking off, which was amazing. We had donors from all over the country and even a few Canadians had pledged money to the cause. I had stayed up late almost every night writing thank-you notes, emailing people to schedule events, and deciding what clothes I had to purchase with Edward's grandmother since she insisted on supplementing my wardrobe because of all my appearances that I had to make.

Not that I was complaining at all about the free clothes, and Edward enjoyed all the pictures I was sending him of me in my new clothes and honestly, I enjoyed all the pampering. But, I would've traded it all in and lived as a pauper, for just five minutes with my hero, my Edward.

(EPOV)

I put my head down and propelled myself faster over the dirt path that was my challenge. One of my commanding officers had not only assigned fifty pounds to my pack, but my friend-my brother, practically-was too weak to continue, so I was tossed his pack as well as my own. As I ran I could only concentrate on one thing….

"Run, keep running, just run."

I felt as if my lungs were going to burst. I couldn't get enough air, and I had to force my legs to continue, which was an extra challenge in itself because they felt like one hundred pounds of pure lead. I slowed my pace a bit so I could breathe and adjust the weight over my chest and shoulders. As my eyes began to spot-a sure sign that losing consciousness was in my future-I forced myself to see Bella's beautiful face in my mind's eye. Somehow, I felt a surge of energy rush through my body, as if Bella herself was driving me forward, urging me on, on toward my goal.

Somehow I finished my run, I even had extra time to finish, and I had passed over half of the men doing the exercise with me. Pride gushed through me as one of my commanding officers took the packs off of me and gruffly told me that I'd "done a good job, Cullen". It almost felt like high school baseball all over again, without the butt-pat.

As I headed to the gym to pump some iron, making the best use of my adrenaline still running through my system, my thoughts returned to Bella. She would be my inspiration now, the one thing I would think on to keep me going through long days in the pool, extensive days running and lifting, and those even-more-so stretched days (or so it seemed) in the classroom.

As I lifted the weights, I began to focus, to feel the power running through my veins. I used a technique Bella and I had talked about, visualization, and pictured myself putting on more muscle mass, making myself, my commanding officers, and most importantly Bella, proud of the man I was becoming.

(BPOV)

My heart hurt. I listened to Embry on the phone as he talked about his girl, this nameless, faceless girl that he now liked. He didn't even have the courage to tell me, and it killed me because I told him everything about myself and Edward.

Embry was my ex-boyfriend. I had loved him in December, and also in March, until he broke my heart both times. We had began speaking for about two hours a night, just talking about everything, sharing all of our daily experiences, and then those gave way to future plans or past stories. We were honestly just the best of friends…well until now.

"B….I miss you."

The words confused me. Embry was here, and only twenty, and lord knows four years looked a hell of a lot better than six. But my Edward, oh Edward, I could never betray him, and up until now it was all a friend thing with Embry. Why did guys have to do that to me, decide they wanted me when I was finally happy. Ugh, boys were so frustrating.

Embry told me that we could discuss it more the next day, and I agreed, telling him goodnight. As I rested my head on my pillow, I couldn't even settle my thoughts on just Edward. Embry kept edging in…it killed me to see his face where Edward's should've been so clearly. I just had so many things to contemplate…and I couldn't even tell anyone, the two boys I trusted the most, they were in this internal battle, and Tori…she would voice her opinion to myself…and Jazz, which wouldn't help, not at all.


	10. I Wanna Feel You Breathing

**A/N: Thanks guys for reading this, and those of you who review...please tell me if you think I should add more descriptions or more dialouge or both, I need advice! =)**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight...but I do own a cute new fuzzy Rabbit from Easter...fake of course. Dang. =)**

**Oh, and here's my REC: for this story..this one's amazing, it honestly made me cry. Definatly a one-shot that'll make you wish there was more! It's by beegurl13 and it's called Clipped Strands of Fate. =)**

* * *

(BPOV)

Ugh, another Monday morning, and of course I was scheduled to help open. Remind me again why I work at a coffee shop? Why would I work at a place with decadent coffee and simply to-die-for chocolate sauce to cover fluffy, home-made biscuits? Oh, maybe because it was the coolest place around town to hang out, and the place that paid the best.

Embry had kept me up until about two in the morning, talking on the phone about everything and yet nothing at all. The topics of discussion ranged from his other ex-girlfriend, Leah-he wanted her back, all the way to my best friend's, Tori and Jazz, which lead to the topic of Edward. I was eager to talk about the love of my life, however Embry began to get quiet and tense up when I mentioned anything Edward-related. Ugh, boys are so weird.

I finished making my bed and then I pulled back to the curtain s to reveal yet another most beautiful summer morning. The sun was already blazing, baking the concrete on my driveway, not to mention how my truck would feel like hell when I climbed into it. The water in the pool sparkled a brilliant aqua color and momentarily I forgot that I had work in an hour and a half. I was already contemplating a morning wake-up swim. Damnit, I hated my job. Absolutely hated it, hated it, and hated it.

One hour, a shower, and my full make-up on later, I was almost ready for work. I hustled into my black dress pants and a sunny, yellow polo shirt and my trusty plain black ballet flats and I headed for the door with my keys in hand. My phone, which was nestled deep down into my large black leather Marc Jacobs bag (compliments of Katherine of course), was ringing loudly to my text tone.

//I've got the gift of, one liners and you've got the curse of curves.//

//And with this gift, I can pose words and the question that comes forward.//

//Are you perspiring, from the irony? //

Shit. Of all the times for someone to send me a random text. At least I wasn't asleep, and then whoever that was would've been seriously dead. I forced myself to wait until I reached my truck, cranking it, turning the air on full blast, and cracking the windows. Then I began to dig until I reached my still humming cell phone.

_Good morning, beautiful. _

Ugh, Embry. I didn't really have time for him this morning, but Embry was my friend after all, so I threw out a joking reply.

_Good morning yourself, doll. _

I call everyone doll.

By the time I arrived at work, my phone was practically burned up from our messages, and I felt a small sense of relief when I was able to tell him I had work to do.

The morning quickly faded into afternoon, a near constant stream of customers made it nearly impossible to sit and contemplate what was going on between Embry and I, or Edward and I. the only way I could even tell the passage of time was by the change from breakfast items to the lunch/brunch menu. At the beginning of my shift I was serving biscuits with chocolate sauce or eggs Benedict. Now I was bringing out bowls of steaming tomato soup and melty grilled cheese, or our signature BLT.

I enjoyed my job, don't get me wrong. I did hate having to be inside slaving away on a beautiful morning, but I enjoyed meeting new people and visiting with the regulars. And I could've been doing a hard job, this was simple and I really did love it. Even my bad days at this job were pretty good ones.

"Hey there, pretty lady."

_What the hell?_

I looked up from where I was standing at the counter, writing down some of my tickets. There in all of his glory was Embry Call.

"Hey yourself. What can I for you today?"

Embry smiled, but didn't hinder me. He just ordered the turkey club and a sweet tea and I practically ran away from the counter, into the kitchen.

Sam, our cook, took one look at me and asked if I was okay, because apparently I looked positively green. I tried to give him a reassuring smile as I gathered my wits to take Embry his tea…but somehow, I'm sure Sam knew that it was all a farce.

I only tripped twice on my way back to the counter, taking the long way out of the kitchen, holding the glass with both hands so I wouldn't spill it. I sat the glass down carefully and then backed away, and then proceeded to start wiping down the already clean counters-an unnecessary piece of busy-work.

"Um Bella, I mean, miss."

"Yes sir, Embry." I giggled at the formality; a blush began heating my neck and cheeks.

"This is unsweet, which is a nice way of saying that it sucks."

I rolled my eyes at him, whisking his glass away and replacing it with a new sweet tea. As I turned to see if I could help anyone, I noticed the café was practically dead, with only a few stragglers sitting around, nursing almost full teas, and talking. All of that was too bad, because it gave me no excuse to leave the counter.

"B…can we talk?"

I reached for his straw wrapper, trying to make myself look busy.

"I don't know Embry, I'm…um…kind of busy."

"I call bullshit on the one. You're just doing pointless shit to avoid me now."

"Embry, maybe I am. You're killing me though. You've hurt me twice! How do I just forget this amazing, perfect thing I have with Edward just because you decide to waltz back in and have me back. I don't want to be broken all over again, and plus I love Edward and he loves me."

As my little hissy-fit, rant-type-deal came to fruition, the heat which scorched my face from my blush flamed harder than it ever had before. The few patrons that were in the café were silent; all eyes were on Embry and me. Sam's wife Emily slid Embry's turkey club over the counter to him along with his ticket. The clock ticked. I glanced at my hands and straightened my apron around my waist.

Embry looked over his shoulders at the few patrons who had witnessed the outbreak.

"Stop staring, there's nothing to look at!"

I whispered that I was sorry to Embry and then I ducked into the kitchen where Sam told me that it was okay for me to have the remainder of the day off. I gratefully slid my time card, not really caring about the lost time, even though it meant lost money. I grabbed my shit and headed out the door to where "Black Magic", my truck, awaited. All would've been right with the world if I hadn't left my stupid truck unlocked.

Embry-fucking-Call had left three dozed pink roses and a burned CD on my front seats. He knew my weaknesses, flowers and music. Damn.

* * *

(EPOV)

I threw my clothes into my laundry bag and stalked out of the door of my barracks. My roommate was a complete jerk-wad asshole. He'd tripped over a box that was at the end of my bunk with all of my Bella things in it. I had come back to him immersed in our letters and going through all of the pictures of us, and her, and every memento I had kept. Needless to say, I was pissed. But I guess the part that pissed me off the most was when he asked how old she was. I mean, I told him-hoping he would understand. But of course, as fate would have it, he didn't he proceeded to call me a pedophile, a child molester, and a cradle robber. I couldn't handle it and I punched the guy in the face, effectively breaking his nose and getting myself a month in solitary confinement, supplemented with a month of night shift.

As I made my way across the base on foot, to my new home for a month, I just felt…heavy. It was a white room, bright with fluorescent bulbs. There was a cot, a dresser, and a desk. I had internet access to do my work on, and I had my personal cell phone. They would let me out to go to the bathroom and for two hours a day to work out and run. Then I'd start my night shift at the gate, patrolling; beginning at eleven. I'd work until six the next morning, then I'd be allowed to sleep. Sadly, that sounded good to me.

I didn't care for many people on the air base. I tried to be respectful to my superiors, and I really honestly attempted to the guys around me, but sometimes I got pushed to my limits. Personally, solitary confinement would suit me just fine. At least I could cry now, and not feel like less of a man. It just killed me to not be able to be with Bella. She was the only on that I would ever, ever need.

* * *

(BPOV)

My phone had been going off all day. Embry's texts blowing up my phone. I talked to him in between dropping off a dozen roses for Esme, giving another dozen to Tori, and keeping one dozen for myself. I drove around my neighborhood aimlessly, debating internally about whether to listen to the CD or not. I finally gave in, sliding out my Jack Johnson CD and putting in the plain silver CD with EC printed neatly at the top. It freaked me out how Embry and Edward had the same initials. That was just another one of those weird little things I would have to learn to deal with.

"Bella, this is Embry. I wasn't sure how to make my feelings prominently known to you, so I thought a song would be best."

Embry's voice coming through my speakers startled me. I knew he had recorded it at Re-Trac in Lineville, a local-and-cheap recording studio. The quality wasn't awful, and his voice had a soothing quality to it. The soft strains of our favorite Uncle Cracker song started playing and Embry's voice began coming in.

//You're better than the best. I'm lucky just to linger in your life. Cooler than the flipside of my pillow, that's right. //

//Completely unaware, nothing can compare to where you sent me, lets me know that it's okay, that it's okay, and the moments where my good times start to fade, you make me smile like the sun…//

It was our mutual favorite. It was a song he had hated until I forced him to listen, really listen to it, and he discovered he loved it. Now I had to deal with the fact that he felt that way about me…and maybe I felt the same way about him… In fact, that last thought scared me so much that I pushed the radio button and turned the channel to a loud rap station. I needed it to drown out my thoughts.

* * *

(BPOV)

Edward had called me at about eight to tell me about the fight and his punishments. It worried me that he was excited about being by himself so much. He needed people around him so that he wouldn't wallow in his self-pity that surrounded out predicament.

The minute we got off the phone I stepped into action. I began an email to Katherine, begging for her to send a package to E, I also forwarded it to Esme and then I began working on one for him myself.

I put in several new pictures of me, some of his family, a new book I saw that I thought he might enjoy, and some snacks. In addition to that, I added some burned CD, a notebook full of paper to write to myself and his family, envelops, stamps, and finally one of the first Operation Home-Front tee-shirts that we had printed out.

Mom came to see what I was doing, and after hearing the story, she came back to my room bringing a bag of toothpaste, toothbrushes, razors, shampoo, lotion, and shaving gel for Edward and some of the guys he shared the base with. I hugged and thanked her, and added the stuff. I didn't mention to her the fact that Edward had no one to share any of those things with.

Lastly to my box I added a sweet note from myself, sealed with my perfume and a kiss. I taped, addressed, and stamped the box, then I sat it on my desk to be mailed, but even as it sat there, I wasn't sure if it still meant the thing it would've meant before Embry told me his true feelings.

Actually, it completely terrified me that Embry evoked feelings like those inside of me. I had always thought no one would ever give me those wonderful feelings, except for my Edward. But now when I closed my eyes, there were two pictures. Edward, tall and strong, pale and muscular. Embry, shorter and thinner, still strong but not built with the muscle mass that Edward had acquired. Where Edward was more educated, school wise; Embry was more of a common sense person that didn't have much of an opportunity for school. He was, however, extremely proud of his Creek Indian background, and his ability of singing-almost to the point of being acutely annoying, and extremely cocky. But I guess that's just how guys are.

* * *

(EPOV)

My first night in solitary was a bitch. I didn't get to start the night shift until the next night, so I basically wrote Bella a ridiculously long five-page letter, and then I sat there playing solitaire on my lap top until about three in the morning. And if I had thought they were joking about how you don't talk to anyone, boy was I wrong. When they delivered food or packages, no one spoke. When they released me to piss-no talking. Even when I went to the gym, or to run, I felt like a marked man because of the guys just walking away when the saw me. Apparently my reputation had preceded me. Fantastic.

* * *

(BPOV)

When Saturday rolled around I decided that I would finally give into Embry's begging and pleading and I would ride his jet ski with him, on the lake. I met him at the spot on Highway 48 where he could put-in by the bridge. My friends Jacob, Alec, and Jane were all getting ready to jump off the bridge, so I asked Embry if he would just come pick me up when I hit the water after the jump. After he agreed, I slipped off my blue and white plaid shirt, tube-top thing and my dark, almost black, blue jean shorts. That only left my cute little white strapless bikini top, and my matching white bottoms. I threw the clothes into my truck along with my Chucks, and I walked quickly to the mid-section of the bridge.

Alec smiled at me as I neared them and Jane hugged me closely.

"Bells, Bells, Bells, let me help you on up there. Come on Alec, lift Jane."

Soon Jacob's arms were hugged tightly around my waist and he was helping me balance on the small, tall piece of concrete that lined the sides of the bridge. Alec had boosted Jane up beside me and she gripped my hand tightly.

"Oh Bells, I'm going to just have a panic attack if we don't hurry up and jump on in." Jane whispered to me in her sweet southern drawl, her eyes downcast into the dark water.

We told the boys to let go of us, and suddenly we stood there, alone-well just the two of us. The pavement was burning hot, but there was a cooling breeze coming off of the lake, the Alabama pine trees were swaying in the wind. Jane's hand was beginning to feel hot and sticky and I was sure I was burning on my shoulders, face, and forehead. Not cool.

"Janie, let's jump on three."

She nodded and we began to whisper together, "One, okay…two…THREE!"

We pushed our feet off together and our hands tore apart. As we spiraled downward through the air, I lost sight of Jane and then I clenched my eyes shut tightly. However, all too soon I hit the water with my right side and it immediately numbed. The water rushed in my ears and I longed to open my eyes, but the pressure pushed against me and I couldn't do anything, I felt stuck, like I was being sucked down, down, down. My head was dizzy and I tried to take in air, but all that resulted in was gulping water down into my lungs. My body felt pinpricks all over and I just needed to breathe, my lungs felt as if they were about to collapse. Suddenly, I felt two strong arms scoop me up and rush me toward the surface, but sadly after that, everything went black.

"Bella, please God…Bella, come on Bella."

"Dude, you got to her so fast…"

"Is she going to be okay? God Bella. Embry…should I call 911?"

I tried to speak up, to answer Embry, Jacob, and Jane's questions, to ease their fear. But instead of my voice, all that came out was a rumbling cough and a nasty spurt of lake water. I tried again, this time opening my eyes and grabbing the first thing I saw, Embry's large hand.

"Shhh, its okay baby girl. Come here, I've got you now. It's all going to be okay."

We were back on the shore, apparently, although I didn't know how we got back there. Embry lifted me into his arms as if I weighed nothing and he carried me to his yellow and black S10. I huddled as close to him as I could get until he sat me down on the hood and pulled his towel around me. His chest was just so warm. But Jacob, being the friend he was, had went to get my clothes, my towel and my phone.

As I shrugged into my shorts and a hoodie he had found in my truck, he held out my phone to me. The sharp breath I took in caused everyone to panic, until I shushed them. Five missed calls. Edward.

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	11. I'll Take Your Hand, Pick You Up

**A/N: I just want to thank every single person who reads, it doesn't matter if you review or not. You're all amazing and I just want to thank you for being interested in something that reflects my life. However, if you'd like to see my writing really take off...review. =) Also, this chapter is so short because it's a filler. This is about to get to the reallyyy good part. Kay thanks guys!**

**Disclaimer: I ordered an Air Force bear yesterday for my Michael...but I don't own Twilight. =(**

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"I'll Take Your Hand, Pick You Up"

(EPOV)

I paced around my room. All of my things were packed and I was just waiting on Bella to call me back. I at first had decided to call to tell her about my punishments being taken away, and myself cinching a new roommate. After two phone calls went unanswered I became uneasy, after four I was panicking. After the fifth, I texted her, telling her to call me and I grabbed my bags and left my prison cell of a room in a huff.

As I crossed the base, everything I thought just didn't sound good in my head, and it either pissed me off or made me feel sick to my stomach. She could be hurt, with that Embry kid, or maybe…hopefully, she was with my mom and the boys. I almost ran into the black door that led to my new set of barracks and I cursed as I opened the door. Benjamin, my new roommate was sitting at our computer desk and he turned to look at me, a wide smile spreading across his tanned face as he realized it was me.

"Well hello dude, as soon as I heard the expletive, I just knew it had to be you!"

He stood and shook my hand as I searched his face, seeing traces of his brother, James in him.

"Yes, I know. Even before you say anything…I know I look a great deal like my brother, and as I understand, you were the best of friends before he was deployed and well…lost his life. May God rest his soul…"

I breathed in deeply, I hadn't thought of James in a long, long time. We had worked out a lot together when I was at Lackland, before transferring to Sheppard. And we had also bonded over hours spent playing DJ Hero. When he had been deployed, it fueled my hunger for serving this country even more. I longed to serve this country with brave men like him, in hopes that I one day could be as much as they were. I was pretty excited when Ben contacted me and after hearing my predicament, went to our superiors and talked them into giving me a second chance. I had finally made a friend since being transferred.

"So man, tell me, how is Bella?"

"She's alright as far as I know…"

"What do you mean as far as you know? How'd she take the news about you getting out of solitary?"

"Man, I have no idea. She won't answer her phone. I'm starting to get a little pissed, and a little more worried."

He gave me a worried glance.

"Dude, Tia did that once, I went home and kicked her ex boyfriends ass and it never happened again. We've never been happier together."

I shook his hand and forced a grin as I grabbed my shower stuff and a pair of black sweat pants and a white tee shirt. My black boxers tagged along too as I made my way out of our room and down the hall towards the showers.

(BPOV)

Embry tried to pull me close to him again and I pushed against him angrily. Edward had to know. I should have just told him I was spending the afternoon with Embry. So essentially I lied to Edward, well not really…but still. And now look at what happened, I could've been hurt, and that would've been fun to explain. He trusted me so much, and now I had royally fucked up.

"Move, let me go Embry. I have to call Edward."

Embry moved to the side and let me slide off of his truck. He reached out and grabbed my wrist softly, not hurting me, just applying enough pressure to stop me.

"He doesn't own you, Bella. I was here to protect you, not him."

His words struck me, I felt almost as if he had slapped me in the face.

"You're right, Embry Call. Edward doesn't own me. I gave myself willingly. And he wasn't here to protect me, because he's in Texas serving a greater purpose."

"That's where you're wrong, honey. This, him serving his country bullshit. He should put you first always, and how you feel. God, is he blind, because if he could see, then he sure wouldn't, shouldn't be able to leave you."

"Embry, you're fucking ridiculous. Edward is there for me. He loves me."

"He tells you that so you feel special. He's over there for him, not for you, it'll never be for you."

I threw my hands up and walked away to my truck leaving Embry to stand there and run his hands through his hair. I also tried to pretend in my mind that the fight I just had with Embry didn't matter, but the seed of doubt had already been planted in my mind. I just needed to get rid of it.

I drove down the road, doing my best to keep to the speed limit despite my emotional roller coaster running through my mind. I really didn't need a cop stopping me and giving me a ticket. That would just be icing on today's cake.

As I came into Lineville, I pulled into the Shell station parking lot and flipped my cell phone open. I saw a new text from Edward saying to call him. I pressed the green button on my phone to call him, and waited patiently for it to connect.

It rang, and rang, and rang some more. Finally it went to voicemail.

"Edward…this is Bella. I saw your calls and text. I'm sorry I'm missing you again. I'll be watching my phone. Call me. Oh and E, I love you."

I put special emphasis on the word you because I needed him to call me back. He had to be really angry to be screening his calls. I was hurt. Oh, and I was pretty scared, really scared. As much as I was confused about the feelings I held for Embry, my heart was very clear on the fact that I still loved my Edward.

My hands shook as I placed them back on the wheel and started my drive home. The radio was softly playing "Heartbreak Warfare" by John Mayer and I couldn't really bear it. I cut it off quickly and stared off into the distance, driving about sixty in a fifty-five.

Suddenly I saw the flashing behind me, it seemed as if I was being offered a blue light special…okay just a dumb-ass cop pulling me over. I guided my truck over to the shoulder of the road and saw my friend Jacob's dad, Billy, pull up behind me in his white police Tahoe.

"Shit…of all the cops…"

Billy was not only my best friend's dad, but also my own dad's best friend. His face looked grim as he walked around the corner of my truck after checking my tag. By that point all the stress of the day began to overflow, this was just another huge thing to worry about. My eyes began to water and my hands started shaking harder than before. All of a sudden, Mr. Billy was at my window, looking in at me and then pulling my door open, pulling me into his arms.

"Bella, shhh now. Its okay, I just wanted to let you know they've been working on the cell phone towers and your dad couldn't get reception all day. He didn't want you to worry if he didn't answer or call, I thought this would be the best way to tell you…oh, and to have a little fun with you. What's wrong honey?"

I was still blubbering over Edward and Embry, and now I was embarrassed because I was crying.

"Mr. Billy…I am so sorry, I didn't mean to just fall apart like that. I've got a lot of drama going on in my life, and when I thought I was getting a ticket too…"

"Bells, it's fine. All is well."

He kissed my cheek and patted my head before shutting my door, patting it softly to let me know it was safe to drive away.

* * *

(EPOV)

I looked down and picked up my phone from where I stashed it under my dirty clothes while I was cleaning up in the shower. Shit, I had missed Bella again. And her message sounded depressed and sad like she thought I was angry with her. Now I had to fix it, my poor baby girl was back at home, sad, and it was my fault and I couldn't do anything about it. What am I saying, I had to at least try to fix it. My life would be pointless, fruitless even, without Bella in it. She made everything better. She was like, the chocolate dip to my plain vanilla cone. I loved her. So much.

I flipped my phone open and pulled her up in my contacts, my eyes lingering on the picture I had of her as her contact photo…a shirt that was black and low cut…white shorts that were so short and tight and sexy. My hot girl. I pressed the green call button and her answer tone, Strawberry Swing, came on. It wasn't long though, her voice, dripping with emotion like she'd been through hell, came over the line.

"Baby girl, first of all stop crying. I have some stuff to say. Shhh, let me talk honey. I haven't been there for you, I know that. I feed you these bullshit lines and I know I need to be real with you, but I just…don't know what to say sometimes. Because I want to say that everything will be okay, but how do I know that well enough to tell you how do I know that my situation won't change? I just don't want to hurt you anymore. I only want to make this work."

Bella's hard breathing slowed a little bit, as she hiccupped. Her voice sounded ragged.

"Edward…thank you for being honest with me, however I don't deserve it. I was with Embry today and something very bad almost happened."

"What?"

She recanted the story of the bridge and Embry saving her and how she was very scared. I could practically see that fucker holding my unconscious Bella in his arms. In my eyes, she didn't know. She was only using him for his jet ski. I hoped she still only had feelings for me, although I could've told myself it would be difficult. The thing that pissed me off the most was that I hadn't even been fucking trying. I hadn't told Bella the right things. Once she had said something about phone sex, but I hadn't even really thought about it past that. Damn it.

"Baby, its fine. We both make mistakes."

"But I have to get rid of my feelings for Embry that are resurfacing. Like now."

"Yeah babe, I know how you can do that. I get a weekend leave, not long enough to come home, but fly out here "on business" or something. Please, I'll pay for everything."

"That's really tempting. Let me work on it today and see if I can get off work and stuff and get the parental units into it."

We talked for a few minutes, happy about where we were standing, relationship wise, and excited about her probably coming to stay with me this weekend. I was so happy. My Bella would be with me soon.

(BPOV)

I wasn't sure if I should be happy, or if I should cry. I wanted to spend the weekend with Edward, in a hotel…but I wasn't sure if that would banish my feelings for poor Embry. That damned Embry.

First of all, I called work, seeing if I could have the weekend off. Emily said although it was Tuesday, she would find a way for me to be off Friday through Monday. However, that was the easy part. My parents would most likely be a completely different story.

* * *

"Hey mom?"

"Yeah baby, I'm in the kitchen."

"Oh you're making baked ziti, my favorite!"

"Yeah, I'm making another tray for you to take to Esme."

"Awesome…I was actually going to ask you about something."

"If it's about going to Wichita, Katherine's already taken care of everything. All you have to do is pack up the things she send for you. It's all in bags in your room-and before you even ask-no, I didn't peek."

She smiled at me and I gave her a huge hug before rushing off to my room to throw myself into the new bags of shorts, capris, tank-tops, halter-tops, flip-flops, bikinis, and a new Air Force hoodie. Oh and not to mention the lingerie…wow Katherine must've thought we really gave a fuck about that. We just needed skin…bare, salty, sweaty skin. All of a sudden I was brought from my dream world of skin, my text tone was going off.

To: Bella

From: Embry

_Bella, I'm so sorry about today. I've fallen for you so much. Please be with me. _

I felt a tear run down my cheek, my heart was ripping into two different pieces. Embry was here, being with him could be easy and simple. But after having Edward, I wasn't really sure I could handle simple. I really liked the many facets of our relationship. I liked how we had to work things out, and how every obstacle we overcame, it made us stronger. It was almost like we were building…building a love…building a life. There was never anything uncomplicated about Edward, although the complications weren't all bad. Sometimes he just gave me these rushes…

I put my phone away, deleted Embry's last message, and began my packing list. I also shot an email off to Katherine, thanking her for talking to my mom and especially for all the new clothes.

Katherine had really been huge in my life since Edward had left. When I needed anything, without hesitation, she went and got it, no matter what it was, no matter the price, I would have it. And she'd been working tirelessly on Operation Homefront, constantly seeking more support, persistently recruiting volunteers, and even taking time to help me write my personal speeches for community events. She was so amazingly proactive, nothing remained undone around Katherine. She took responsibility of everything, taking charge and getting everything accomplished. Edward was lucky to call her his grandmother, and personally, I was lucky to call her my friend.

(EPOV)  
I practically jumped out of the shower/bathroom area with joy. My Bella would be here Friday night! This was a huge deal for us, and I was so excited to fully win her back. I probably had a little extra swagger when I walked in the door of the room Ben and I shared.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa Señor. What's going on with you?"

"What do you mean? I'm fine, fantastic, super actually." I said, spitting my words out entirely too fast.

Ben winked at me, "Who's the señorita?"

"Bella! She's my only lady! Ever!"

"Alright, alright. What happened that gives you that glow?"

"Damnit, I'm not pregnant. Airmen don't glow. Bella's coming this weekend."

"Oh…so I get to meet the lucky lady? That is if you decide to come out of the hotel room at all."

I growled at him and then laughed, I couldn't be mad if I hoped it was true. We threw a few punches at each other, just in a brotherly nature and then we decided to go to the mess hall and grab a bite. This was ten times better than before, I felt like I finally had a brother here, I finally had an ally.

(BPOV)

The week passed by at an agonizing rate. Wednesday at work, I felt as if no one wanted food. The café was so dead. After I got off work, I headed to youth group and our message was on what else…patience, of course.

Thursday wasn't any better. I didn't have to work, so I thought I'd go to the lake with Jacob, Angela, Alec, and Jane. We all rode Jacob's parents boat and that was okay, but being the odd numbered girl made me acutely aware of how absent Edward was so me. It wasn't easy to fall asleep that night.

However, Friday when I stepped off the plane at eight, after a two hour flight, I knew all my waiting, all my restless nights, it was all worth it.


	12. Hold Me When I'm Here

**Disclaimer: I don't own these wonderful characters; however the storyline is all mine.**

**A/N: Guys, I'm so sorry about my irregular updates! But if yall decided to review more, then I might be more inspired to update faster...maybe! I love you guys, even if you just glance at my story, I love you! Thanks so much again! =)**

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***Hold Me When I'm Here***

(BPOV)

Ugh, world's longest flight, that was the title I wanted to give the past two hours of my life. The plane ride had been hell. Turbulence, babies wailing, old men hitting on me, and bitchy flight attendants. I had never been happier to get off a plane. Plus it didn't help me that Edward would be there waiting for me. There's no way I would've ever went through that hell for anyone else. I couldn't help but search for Edward in the crowd as I made my way toward the baggage claim. And there, in all his glory, his official, formal dress, was my Edward. He was holding my lime green bag with the zebra print ribbon, my black bag with the purple ribbon, and my hot pink shoe bag. No guy had ever looked so good holding brightly colored, girly luggage.

"Edward!" I screamed in his direction, taking off running at a full gallop. He sat my bags down by his shiny black shoes and held his arms out as I ran toward him. I ran right up to him, tossing my carry-on and my purse into the pile of my stuff and I jumped into his waiting arms. My legs wrapped tightly around his waist and my fingers clamped down onto his neck, our lips crushed together as his hands flew up to hold my hips.

His mouth tasted like peppermint, I knew how he made a nervous habit out of snacking on peppermint candies until whatever ordeal it was, was over. He must've been anxious waiting for me. I automatically wanted to make him feel better.

He eased me down gently, onto my feet, kissing me softly once again and then he picked up my bags and smiled at me.

"Okay baby, let's go. My car's out in the parking deck."

I shouldered my purse and carry-on bag, as he hefted my other three bags over his broad shoulders. I had never been happier as he placed his hand on the small of my back and led me off to his white Mustang convertible and a perfect weekend with my hero.

(EPOV)

As we arrived at the hotel from the airport I gave Bella the opportunity to change into something dressy so I could take her out to a nice, new restaurant close to the base. The Azalea Grill served excellent gourmet southern cuisine, along with real sweet tea. Bella would love it.

While I sat on our bed, I heard Bella banging around in the bathroom, probably fixing her hair or something. I finally picked up her book, The Lovely Bones, out of her carry-on bag, and immersed myself in it, so much that I didn't even hear the door open, or see my Bella step out.

When I looked down at the floor, I saw Bella's dainty feet, which she had settled into some black, patent leather, peep toe, sky-high heels. My eyes traveled up her tanned, toned calves, over her knees, to her thighs where a short black dress began, rising to her breasts where pink silk covered them slightly. Her hair was pulled up simply, a few curls escaping from her messy bun. I was automatically turned on. It was almost more that I could tolerate. My innocent little Bella looked nothing like a naïve child anymore. I almost shivered as she walked closer to me, my breath hitching in my throat at what happened next. Bella leaned over me, her cute breasts swaying slightly, making my heart thump and jump. She placed her pink, pouty lips next to my ear and said, "Edward…I need you...now."

Even I could throw my hands up and say fuck the reservations, although Grandma might kill me, there was no telling how much she'd spent on securing us dinner there.

Bella stood back up straight and I reached my hand up her back to unzip her dress. It slipped right off with a little help from me, and as she started to kick the heels off, I stopped her; Bella in sexy heels had always been a fantasy of mine.

I fumbled around, undressing quickly, trying to grope Bella as I worked my uniform off. She stood in front of me, stark naked, she had worn nothing under her dress, and I was SO turned on. She used her palms on my chest as I stood tall in front of her in my boxer briefs. As she pushed me down on to our bed and removed my remaining clothing, I was startled by how sexy she was.

Her skin gave off an understated blush as she crawled on top of me, her heels adding to her allure. Soon though, Bella interrupted my thinking by crawling up as I laid down on the bed and planting her bony ass right on my chest.

"Edward, I missed you a lot."

She looked down at me, whispering these words, linking our fingers together and then letting go of me. I settled my large hands on her hips and looked at her tight little belly. I leaned up and kissed it, sending her backwards to where she proceeded to ride me like crazy for at least an hour. I had never felt so sexually satisfied before. Bella felt so good, inside and out. Once, as she started reaching her edge, about to go over it, I reached up and grabbed her tits. It completely gave a whole new sensation to her and she screamed so loud, I'm almost positive her parents that were back in Alabama heard us.

Afterwards, it was about eleven, we had cleaned ourselves up and I told Bella to find some casual clothes so that I could take her out to grab a bite to eat.

She started going through her bags again as I dove back into her book. I saw her slip on a teal mini skirt with like, a crocheted design on the hem. She was standing there, her boobs all perky, no bra yet, and I realized all over again how hot she made me. The skirt was so bright and made her tan look even darker. She added a black loose, flowy top over the skirt, still no bra, and the back had cut out sports that allowed me to see her delicate shoulder blades, to that she added black flip-flops with a silver braided accent. I smiled as she ran a brush through her messy, sweaty hair and again as she put my tags around her neck, and looked at me, ready to go. I jumped up, throwing my khaki cargo shorts and a black polo on, adding my black Nike shox just as she began tapping her foot.

"Baby, I'm ready. Let's go. Waffle House sounds good, right?"

She nodded, grabbing my hand and smiling up at me with those big, brown, trusting eyes. Ah, there was my innocent girl, all over again.

I pulled our door shut behind us, feeling the eyes of two business men, an old couple, and a middle-aged Mexican maid on us as we walked to the elevator. I felt like I should be singing that Trey Songz song, "Neighbors Know My Name". They all had to know we had been in there getting busy.

"Sir, you need new sheets, no?" The quiet, Hispanic maid said to me.

I saw Bella blush violently out of my peripheral vision as I quickly nodded yes to the woman and continued ushering Bella to the elevator, as the business men continued to chuckle behind us.

(BPOV)

As we waited for our pancakes and bacon and grits, my face was still burning from the stares that Edward and I had received as we exited our hotel room. Maybe I just wasn't used to people knowing about my sex life, but I defiantly wasn't used to them actually hearing it. And I usually wasn't even that loud; maybe that was from us not doing it for a while. No matter what, I was exceptionally embarrassed.

Edward reassured me over ad over, telling me that we'd probably never even see those people ever again. As he placed his hand over mine, and our knees gently brushed under the table, I knew that I was exactly where I was supposed to be, and no one – not even Embry, could change that.

As the night faded into morning, Edward and I laughed and probably had way to many cups of coffee, in the end I'm pretty sure he started spiking them with Bailey's, but I was having so much fun that I didn't even care. About three thirty, the manager didn't pity us anymore and kicked our drunken asses out of her establishment. We somehow managed to make it back to the hotel and ended up passing out after some drunk groping. It was amazing.

The next morning, I rolled over and my stomach dropped. Edward was no where to be found. I jumped up wearing some of Edward's old, ratty navy blue sweatpants and a gray sports bra. I dashed to the bathroom –no Edward. I jumped out of our door, out into the hall and ran right into my Edward…and the two business men from the day before.

This might've been fine if my sweatpants hadn't been sliding down off of my hips and my nipples weren't hard through my sports bra because I was freezing.

"Bella…these men are Mark Waters and Jeffery Miles. They're major donors to Project Home front. Grandma informed me that we are doing brunch with them in an email this morning. I was just about to come wake you."

I was completely mortified. The men were in suits and Edward was in dark blue jeans and a dark green polo. I looked horrid. I managed a very bashful grin and then dashed back into the room, just in time to hear the men tell Edward what a handful I looked like. Instead of being professional and changing into suitable clothes and going back to face the men, and hopefully changing their impression of me, I dissolved into tears once I reached our bed.

I lay in a messy heap; I had Edward's dark gray Air Force hoodie wrapped around my face, when I heard the door squeak open.

"Baby…come on baby. They just know you're young. It's okay…"

I knew how wary he was at my behavior. Even I knew I should've done the mature thing and salvaged what I could, no matter how embarrassed I was. I looked up at him, slowly uncovering my face to look at him. One glance at his face and I knew he wasn't playing anymore.

"Bella, this is serious. Come here."

He sat down and gently pulled me into his lap.

"Baby, you just left me out there…damn honey, the impression those two men just got, it defiantly looked like I was sleeping with a child, not the young woman they've seen before. I need you to pull yourself together for this brunch and remember to apologize for your less that adult approach this morning."

"But, but Edward. I didn't know they were out there. I was only looking for you. It's not like I normally walk around in public like that and if they've seen me before then they should know that…"

"I know, it doesn't make sense, but let's just find you something really appropriate to wear for lunch. It'll all be perfect. And remember babe, in the professional world sometimes we apologize for things we never really do. It's just how it works."

I nodded and went to shower as he called Katherine to confirm our lunch reservations. I stepped in the hot water, allowing myself to calm down, since I hadn't been able to breathe correctly since my major screw up of the morning. I heard the bathroom door open, but I didn't even bother to open my eyes until I felt the shower door open and I saw my very naked Edward pulling me onto his chest and relentlessly kissing my lips. Needless to say, that was probably one of the best showers of my life.

(EPOV)

I held the door open for Mr. Miles, Mr. Waters, and then my Bella as we entered the Azalea Grill and made our way to the back of the restaurant to where Grandma had secured us an amazing table in the garden room. The air smelled deliciously floral and there was a bright array of flowers every where that you looked.

The place wasn't the only beautiful thing to look at though; my Bella looked absolutely edible, almost to the point where even our men-visitors had trouble speaking to her. She had on this gray pencil skirt that hugged her thighs just right and its hem settled right at her knees, so she still looked professional. But her top was probably the best part. She went the no-cleavage route; it was this hot, silk, tie-dyed sleeveless turtleneck with a keyhole at the nape of her neck. Her tanned, toned arms looked amazing. I was especially turned on when I saw she was wearing the heels that we had…um…"played" in before.

"Now, as I understand, you've been in charge of most of the foundation, with little help from anyone else. How does that make you feel?"

"Well sir, it hasn't been the easiest endeavor that I've ever taken on, but it's worth it. My Edward, he's worth it. I would rather spend all of my time working diligently on things for our men and women in uniform, than spend my time worrying. I know people may see me as nothing more than a teenage girl, but I feel like I am so much more, not in a bragging way, but I just feel as if I have the power to be more than just a weak, powerless girl. I believe we all have that power, the power to be more."

Mr. Waters smiled and leaned back in his chair, I could tell that he was well-pleased with Bella now that she had actually spoken to him and shown her intelligence and dedication. As I chowed down on my lemon chicken and I sucked down a couple of glasses of tasty Carolina Peach Sangria, I continued listening to their banter.

"And you don't think people question your integrity at all? Or the fact that Edward is twenty-three, those things may affect how people not only look at you, but also the organization or even Edward's standing in the Air Force."

Bella studied him carefully, sizing him up as she straightened her back and adjusted her linen napkin in her lap. I could just tell she was about to verbally spar with this thirty year old man that was three times as big as her. But what happened next shocked not only me, but the men also.

"Mr. Miles, you act as if Edward and I aren't fully aware of any of the implications that our relationship may cause. But we have thought, we have discussed parting ways, but neither of us can agree that we would be better off alone. We're simply, better together."

Jeffery looked at her and then patted my back.

"She's a spitfire, but I think I like it. I think she's a perfect personality to represent the foundation. She's bright, witty, young, fresh, not to mention beautiful, I think I would write a check just to be around her."

Needless to say, the brunch was a success. Bella walked away clutching two twenty thousand dollar checks and I walked away amazed, and also staring at my girlfriends tight ass –what? I am still a guy.

(BPOV)

"I think I rocked that lunch date, don't you?"

Edward pulled me down into his lap as he sat down on our bed, where he had been loosening his tie.

"You not only rocked that meeting, you killed that meeting. Those guys didn't even know what hit them until they saw your hot ass walking away."

I laughed out loud as he planted kisses all down my cheek and on my chin. Then he moved to the keyhole in my shirt and licked and kissed on my back for a bit, and my mind started to drift to how I could get used to this, how I could love to wake up to him everyday and for us to end our days just like this, undressing each other and eagerly devouring one another on our bed.

But even as he started to unbutton the button on my shirt and ease it up over my stomach. He slid me off of his lap and onto the bed and started kissing my stomach as he continued to push my shirt up, until we both slid it over my hair.

"Baby…I love you so much. I have a present for you."

Edward stood up completely as I sat up and looked up at him.

"Aw, E…are you sure?"

"I've never, ever been surer about anything in this world, B."

He walked to the bedside table and brought out a black velvet box. He placed it into my hands as they started shaking. How much more could he give me? We were already engaged, he had already given me his whole heart. He had let me into his family and even into his bed. We were already so much in love, what kind of gift could I possibly deserve?

"Sweetie, open it."

I tentatively opened the box and saw a pin, with the Air Force wing insignia on it.

"There's a chain behind that gray packing stuff…you can wear it as a necklace if you'd like."

"You're pi…pi…pinning me?"

"Is that okay, honey?"

I nodded slowly, a smile gradually spreading over my face as I brought the box closer to my face, looking at all the little details on the pin. I truly loved this gift.

"Now you don't have to wear my tags all the time."

"Oh, whoa now, I love your tags. I'll just have those plus your pin-necklace. And E, I really honestly do love it. It's one of the best presents ever."

He kissed me and I moved to put the box away with the rest of my jewelry, and I took all of my other jewelry off and I even finished undressing myself. I looked over to see Edward laying on the bed with only his boxers on and I took my bra off, leaving only my red boy-shorts on and I jumped on the bed, snuggling up to his side.

"Bella, did you take your birth control today?"

He questioned me as he brought me up to sit on his chest. As I leaned down to kiss him, he reached for the bedside table, and it caught me off guard. He was reaching for my packet, to check.

"You almost forgot…didn't you?"

"Yes….but that's what you're here for, right? And plus it's weird…I'm used to having the shot, not the pill. Changing right before this trip is messing me up."

"Sure, but really Bells, you're gonna have to be really careful, I haven't been using a condom. You haven't skipped a day have you?"

"No, I know I took it yesterday. Remember, I took it before we went to the Waffle House."

He nodded and handed me a glass of water and my pill and I swallowed it, gladly. I did not want to be one of those girls, the teen moms. I mean, I had all the respect in the world for girls that could do that, but my life was already complicated enough being with Edward because of his profession. Maybe later in life we would be able to have children, but defiantly not right now. I wanted to finish high school and to let him serve as long as he wanted to in the Air Force; I wanted nothing to hold us back from our dreams, together or separate.

"So what do you want to do tomorrow baby, we only have like, four days to spend together."

"Hmmm, would it be awful if I just wanted to lie in bed with you all day?"

"Not awful…no, but defiantly not what you need to do. And before you jump to conclusions, it's not that I don't want to spend all day in bed with you, I just feel like I should take you to see the base and take you to meet some of my friends. I think it'll be fun and you'll actually end up enjoying it. Oh…and who's to say that we can't come back and have fun at night?"

I laughed and nodded in agreement. I ran to the bathroom to text my parents goodnight, and then Edward and I had a little bit of fun before bedtime. Man, I sure do love my Edward, my Airman.

(EPOV)

The next few days went by quickly, unfortunately. Although Bella really hit it off with Benjamin, I could tell that it was difficult for her to be so close to my other life. She had never been on a military base before, much less one where her boyfriend was required to act a certain way. When I stopped and saluted my superiors and she just stood beside me awkwardly I could defiantly feel a change in her demeanor. But she never let on that she felt uncomfortable. She always took my hand back when I offered it to her, and she was extremely polite to anyone and everyone that I introduced her to.

Once, the very first day I had introduced her to meet Benjamin….

"Hey brother, how have you been?"

"Oh man, I missed you. You left me all alone on base with these assholes. Oops, I guess I should watch my language, we have a lady present…and man, you are a lady. Hi, I'm Benjamin…or Ben, or whatever you'd like to call me."

"Ha-ha, hi Benjamin, I guess you know that I'm Bella already. And you don't have to worry about cleaning up your language for me. Edward doesn't even do that."

"Whatever man, don't let her fool you. I'm the perfect gentleman when I'm around her."

"Yeah…yeah, Ben, he's such a lying ass. He was NOT a gentleman last night."

Ben almost busted a gut laughing about our sex life, and Bella enjoyed teasing me. As much as I was being the butt of the joke, I enjoyed watching her laugh with one of my friends, even feeling comfortable for the first time on base.

I even showed her in my room, the box of pictures and letters and mementos that I kept from our relationship. She was completely touched that I even cared that much and we spent probably a half hour rereading our letters and showing Benjamin all the pictures and telling stories about our relationship. Bella and I even enjoyed a little make out session on me bed, when Benjamin went out for lunch with some of the boys. She even let me get a little closer to going down, which was something she wasn't really comfortable with, so the fact that she let me get closer was something that would make me dorm room a special place for me, for a long time.

Soon though, we had both tired of the base. Bella had taken way to many pictures and even though I knew she was doing it so that she could remember me and the trip, it was still kind of annoying to not be able to see, thanks to all the flashing.

I took her out on our last night together, knowing that she would be boarding a plane that next evening at about five, so I took her to a very nice restaurant, The Market. We enjoyed dining and I enjoyed wining and we basically just enjoyed each others company and reveled in the fact that it was our last night together, and we wanted it to be amazing. Bella was even nice enough to let me grope her up under our table, which was a huge deal, even for a twenty three year old Airman.

(BPOV)

I woke up the next morning, slightly sore but exceptionally happy. Edward and I had come home from The Market last night and we quickly proceeded to undress each other and make love for hours on end, on every surface of our hotel room. My body had really liked it, but now it was kind of regretting it, I had to carefully unhinge my legs and pop my neck a few times before I could climb out of bed.

Edward was so adorable when he slept, and if it hadn't been for the bright morning, Texas sunshine and his light snoring I would've still been asleep beside him. His arm was thrown carelessly over his eyes and his chest rose and fell evenly with his breath. I thought it was crazy ironic how I had always made fun of my mom for putting up with daddy's bear-like snoring, but it had probably started out just like Edward's, quiet and puppy-dog –like.

I showered by myself and put on my makeup and did my hair before packing all my bathroom stuff up. It was really sad that my stay with him was finally coming to an end, but I had achieved my goal. I hadn't thought about Embry the entire time that I was here, up until now and now I was again blocking him.

"Good morning sexy, you trying to get up and out of here before I even wake up?"

"Now you know I wouldn't do that to you, if I did that, who would carry my bags to the airport?"

I laughed at him, he was so sleepy looking and he had red marks all over his shoulders…oops.

I slid on a really pretty, Moroccan blue dress with pretty beading around the neckline, and some black tights. I finished it off with some plain black ballet flats and I blew my hair out, carefully fluffing it just like I knew Edward liked. His dog tags and my pin necklace made their way onto my neck, and I smiled bravely into the mirror.

I knew leaving wouldn't be the easiest thing. I couldn't even imagine it, and I had to do it in just a few hours. Edward seemed to be taking it pretty well; he was calling for room service for brunch, and packing his bags up to head back to the base. So far there was no sign of sadness, which could be a good thing, or a bad thing.

"Hey babe, can I ask for a favor?"

"Of course, dumplin'."

"When you go home…I want you to go get everything you want out of my room. Take it home with you, I never want you to look around and not see bits of me. I have necklaces and pictures and stuff that you can put all in your room and your truck. I love you and I want everyone to know it and see it."

I nodded at him, and he reached his hand out to me. As he pulled me in and I laid my head on his chest, I finally let my tears fall freely. He was wearing a navy blue Air Force tee shirt and a pair of khaki shorts, and in no time, the shoulder area of his tee was soaked in my tears. He smoothed my hair and kissed my head time and time again, whispering how much he loved me and how much he cared about me, and how dear I was to him.

"Bella baby, nothing, absolutely nothing will prevent me from coming home to you. I promise. I'll always come back. See that ring on your finger? That's my ring. I gave it to you. It's a symbol of how I feel. I have to come back, if I don't come back then how can I let my love come full circle? We can have the wedding of your dreams. You just wait baby, I'll be with you before you know it."

In no time at all, Edward was feeding me Belgian waffles with whipped crème. The yummy breakfast food and the cool milk really hit the spot. After breakfast, Edward and I loaded my bags up in the car so that we could check out, and then we headed to his favorite store, Somewhere in Time. It specialized in antiques, which was pretty much the one thing Edward secretly adored. We checked out all sorts of old-timey furniture, and every five minutes it seemed like my love was saying, "Oh, we should have that in our home." It was so adorable.

As time drew near, we both kept checking our phones, knowing that we would grab lunch on the way to the airport and then we'd have to get to work checking my bags and we'd have to make time to say goodbye. Finally, it was almost two thirty. Time had flown by as we had perused the rest of the shopping center, but only after I allowed Edward to buy me a large pair of cubic zircon, drop earrings that looked vintage. They were lovely, just like the afternoon that we were spending together.

"Bella…let's get going to the car. We can stop at Zoë's Kitchen if you'd like, and pick up a chicken salad to go."

I nodded, holding my bag with my earrings in one hand and taking E's larger hand in my other. We grabbed food to go from my favorite healthy restaurant and then we headed for the airport…it was a very sad trip.

The airport…it was the last place I ever wanted to be. Edward held my bags until we checked them, and then we sat down at a table to eat our chicken salads together. His knee was flush with mine; his hand remained over mine also. We needed to be touching. It was necessary.

The time passed way too fast. We were sitting in a large comfy chair sipping on an iced vanilla latte' from the Starbucks in the airport, when I heard my flight called.

"First call for Birmingham, Alabama. Calling all to board flights for Birmingham, Alabama."

He really looked the part, he had changed before we arrived at the airport, back into his fatigues because he had to report straight back to the base when we got done at the airport. Our hands folded together, as he handed me my carry-on bag, and then we made our way to my gate. I felt as if I had déjà vu, people looked at us as he touched my face, sitting my purse and bag down by our feet. Our bodies touched and he looked deeply into my eyes.

"Bella, never ever forget what I said. I love you so much. I'll be home in September…hopefully. But I'll be okay. So will you, because you have that."

He motioned to my ring, running his thumb over it. As we kissed, I heard the last call. Edward was so into our kiss-he was deepening it-that I had to pull back to let him know I really did have to leave.

A sweet old lady walked up to us, "You two sweet kids, I'll tell them to hold the gate. Yall just do what needs to be done, go on now, and take care of business."

We laughed and he kissed me a few more times, mostly on my lips, but sometimes on my forehead, cheeks and chin. Tears ran down both of our cheeks as I let his hands go, picked up my bags, and walked away. I had a hard time looking away from him, his tears streaking his face. As I finally reached the gate, handed over my ticket, I saw him looking for me, on his tiptoes like a little boy, tears still running. My heart was officially broken.


	13. Love Like Crazy

**Disclaimer: No; I may not own Twilight, but I do own a brand new mini Dachshund named Coco Chanel! =)**

**A/N: Sosososo sorry guys about this one being so short, I know that people like to read longer stuff, but it's been crazy around my house and that doesn't help my writers block. I love your guys reviews and every little alert and favorite and review means so much to me! This was just a filler, so the next chapter will hopefully be awesome!**

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(BPOV)  
The next week flew by, I was busy pretty much constantly though, either working or spending time with my family. My sister, Rose was busy planning Dexter's birthday party for September and we had many things to do. She had her heart set on a farm theme so we were working diligently on buying the supplies and picking out invites and everything.

The mid-August heat was really distracting when I was trying to work, the café was always cool and usually quiet, but the week that I returned from Texas our air-conditioner had went out and we were trying to deal with the heat by running huge fans in every corner, it was so loud and annoying and it didn't really cool the restaurant, it just stirred the heat around.

"Bella, what's wrong with you?"

Emily's smooth voice interrupted my train of thought. I had been thinking about Edward and how I wished that I could take him to the party I was going to tonight with my best friend, Jake.

"Oh not too much, just thinking about Edward."

"Ha, I knew it. That's ten dollars Sam!"

"He bet against you…on me?"

"You bet, but really girl, we're a little worried. That poor man's been sitting at that table for ten minutes and you've just been absentmindedly wiping the counter down while he's been waiting on his order to be taken. Get it together girl."

"Oh my gosh, I am SO sorry."

I jumped up from where I had been propped up on the counter and I walked over to where a middle aged man was waiting.

"Sorry sir, are you ready to order?"

He ordered and I gave Sam the order before walking around to bus a few tables while Emily was checking out the customers that had finished their lunch. It was a slow day, just slow enough where I could get lost in my thoughts, and just busy enough where I didn't exactly have time to be doing that.

"When you get done Bella, you can go on. We don't really need you today."

"You sure Sam? I didn't mean to zone out…you know that. I'll try to do better."

"No, you aren't in trouble or anything. We just really don't need you. It's slow today and between Em and I, we've pretty much got it covered."

I smiled at him and finished wiping up the counter and the drink machine. I put on more coffee, I knew that there would be more people to order it throughout the day and I didn't want Emily or Sam to have to worry about that too.

In no time at all I was in my truck and pointed in the direction of home when I saw Tori's car parked at the baseball field. I pulled onto the road that the field was on and realized that Jasper was out hitting in the batting cage with Emmett and Tori was watching, her fingers linked through the chain-link, cheering them on and smiling the biggest smile I'd seen from her in a long time.

"Hey guys! What's up?"

"Bells! We were gonna come see you at work when we got done here, why are you off so early?"

"Slow day, Sam sent me home, he said between Emily and him that they had it covered…so I figured I could find something to do at home."

"Well, you could always hang out with us. I have no clue what we're gonna get into after this, but we're chilling with Emmett today so it can't be that much trouble."

Tori laughed, I knew she wouldn't be getting into any trouble anyway. The most dangerous thing she did was have sex with Jasper, and I knew they were probably the most careful couple I knew. It was kind of insane, the precautions they took, and compared to the ones Edward and I took, they were major. Oh well, Edward would never let anything happen to me.

We spent the rest of the afternoon after the batting cages, going back to my house to use my family's pool. The water felt amazing and all of us swam around and jumped off the diving board and just had a blast. When Tori and I got tired of swimming and being thrown around by the boys, we climbed out of the pool and lay out by the side on a platform my dad had built, for me to lay out on.

"Bella…do you think that you and Edward will last…forever?"

"Wow…I think so. Does something make you think differently?"

"No…it's not that. It's just, I mean, does he even know you're still friends with Embry? Because in my mind, if Jazz was talking to one of his ex girlfriends on the phone every night and going to the lake with them, and saving things they gave him…I would call that emotional cheating."

Her words came over me like a bucket of cold water. Was I emotionally cheating on Edward? That was never my intention and now…now I didn't know. I had planned on hanging out with Embry later in the week, but last night when Edward asked me what I had planned I had told him nothing. Was that because I really thought it was nothing, or because I didn't want him to know? Maybe I was just doing it to protect him…no that's what cowards say. I'm doing it because I want to have the best of both worlds, and I can't…

"Bella, I'm sorry. It's really not my business. Just forget I said anything, please…I'm sorry."

"You have nothing to be sorry for. I hadn't even thought of that before. Do you think I am emotionally cheating on Edward? I want your honest opinion."

"Well…I mean, you hardly ever tell Edward anything about the time you spend talking to Embry, especially if you spend time with him. Like that party at Jake's tonight…did you tell Edward abut that?"

"Not exactly. But I didn't think I needed to, we aren't even going to get to talk tonight, so I figured if it didn't affect our schedule then he didn't need to know."

"He needs to know everything Bella, and it's really more than that…he wants to know everything, he deserves to know everything. He's so sold out for you, and you're only partially there. Don't break his heart. I love him just like a brother, and I want to protect him. You're just like my sister, so I want to protect you too, but I can't do anything about your heart when you're hurting someone else."

Tori's words proved true. Edward was sold out for me, and I was only with him, to a certain extent. After Jasper, Emmett, and Tori left I sat down looking through my scrapbook that I had started for Edward. There were pictures of us fishing with his family, ones taken in his dining room, sitting around the table, there were several taken by Tori of us on the couch in his basement, one where I was kissing his cheek-so cute.

As I looked at those pictures, I knew I loved Edward. He meant the world to me, and all these memories stood as a memorial of our past together and gave me hope of a future. I glanced down at the ring on my finger, my right hand flying up to my throat to feel for my pin necklace and his tags. I was adorned in everything Edward. My _Inspire _bracelet dangled on my right arm, and it occurred to me I hadn't even looked at it in a long time. The word meant more than just its regular meaning. It meant that I was Edward's reason, his reason for being, and his reason for living. I inspired him to be the best man he could be, and that pleased me greatly.

The other word he had engraved on something was the word _Forever _on the inside of my engagement ring. It really did mean forever. Forever was a huge word, a word that we didn't say lightly, even though I'd been saying it and I hadn't really known the meaning of it.

My hand shook as I reached for my cell phone, I tried calling Edward twice, reaching his voicemail twice. I left him a voicemail saying that everything was alright and I'd try him back in the morning, knowing he had a CQ shift that night and he would be too busy to text or call me back.

It was almost seven by the time I finished cleaning the house up for mom and dad, I had even done a load of laundry and taken the trash out, two things I NEVER ever did. My room was calling me, telling me it was time to get ready for the party, Jake had texted me earlier and told me to be there no later than nine, and that I would be staying there with his friend Seth's sister Leah.

Out of my closet I selected a pair of destroyed skinny jeans with a Union Jack flag painted on the right pocket, I paired it with a white lacy tank top and a white lacy vest. I chose a pair of tall black biker boots. They were my absolute favorite, suede and so comfortable. My mom had given them to me after finding them in this overstock store, they ended up being like thirty dollars so my mom was pleased as well as I was.

I left my hair in big, bouncy curls that I had put in for work and my makeup was really simple, smoky black eye shadow, dark gray eyeliner and clear mascara just to separate my lashes and to really make them shine. My favorite hot chocolate flavored lip gloss topped my full lips and then I smiled at myself in the mirror as I flipped my hair.

Without a second thought I grabbed my cell phone and took a picture, sending it automatically to Edward.

To my surprise, he texted me back.

_Where are you headed out to, looking so damn fine?_

Shit…I hadn't told him about the party…lie or the truth, lie or the truth…the truth will take too long to explain, so I lied.

_Oh, just going out to the movies with Jane. You like?_

_Like? Don't you mean love? You look oh-la-la sexy. I'd take you to the movies…or we could make a movie. _

_Later Edward, I love you baby! _

_Love you too, beautiful._

Why had the lie come so easily? I hated myself for lying to him, but my reason was justified. It was a little after eight and it would take me a half hour to get to the house where Jake was throwing the party, it would've taken to long to explain where I was going and Edward would want to know everything about it, who would be there, etc. It was too much trouble, and I could always explain later if I needed to, and who even said I would need to? Nothing was going to happen and Edward would never, ever need to find out about my little white lie.

(EPOV)

As I walked the perimeter of Sheppard Air Force Base, my mind was numb. I had thought of Bella ever since she had texted me that picture. She never dressed up like that to go to the movies. And what she was wearing, she would never wear out with Jane…I just didn't get it. I felt like I was being left out on some weird inside story. I really didn't get it either, I mean, I told Bella everything, as far as I was concerned there were no secrets between us.

I continued my walk, it was long and my gun felt heavy in my hands. The lights were blinding, in fact I wasn't really sure what I was doing here, and I was under strict orders not to shoot anyone unless they posed a serious threat. By the time I got the threat down, there could've been a whole convoy out here. Plus tonight my mind just wasn't on my job, and I knew that I needed to be able to block Bella out of my mind while I worked. This wasn't just a job; it was a job where people could die if I wasn't at the top of my game. Maybe not right now, but if I didn't overcome my weaknesses, being Bella, then if I got shipped to Iraq then I wouldn't stand a chance and I would put all my fellow men in danger as well.

Benjamin was a few feet in front of me; I basically followed his footsteps, literally. The dust was so thick from the lack of rain in this awful desert heat that I could clearly walk on top of his boot prints. It was so strange, I never would've thought of myself as a follower. Ben was the leader of my section; he was also only twenty years old, practically a baby. Before the Air Force I barely took leadership from my father, much less someone that was three years my junior. But Benjamin was very persuasive; he had the type of personality where he made you want to follow him. If I were going into battle, he would be the man that I would want to be covering.

The Air Force had really changed my life, made me mature, made me really start thinking and feeling. A lot of men say that the military makes them cold and unfeeling, or rather their wives do. Which led me to think of another thing that I had always heard about the military, that the husbands may go over and do the fighting, but the women are the ones that pay the price, even if no one loses their life, the women are going to have to deal with the possible post-traumatic-stress and all that. Part of me was beginning to wonder if it was even worth it in the end. Was serving my country worth possible, even indirectly hurting Bella? I love her; I never want her to have to suffer. She's my world, and I would never want to make her feel unloved, if I came home horrified by the terrors I saw overseas, she'd be the one that would have to pick up the pieces. Suddenly I knew what I needed to do and whether Bella liked it or not, I had to do it.

(BPOV)

As I arrived at the farm house where there were dozens of cars parked all over the yard, up and down the road, and in the driveway, I saw several people that I knew scattered around a fire pit and the front porch. I could tell that there were many more in the house, I could see in the windows and the house looked absolutely packed. Seth came up to me and opened my door as I parked haphazardly in the yard.

"Whoa Bella….damn you're looking mighty good tonight. Mind if I take a bite?"

"A bite out of what, might I ask?" I replied in my husky, flirty voice.

"Out of that apple ass in them jeans, you look so fucking hot."

I grinned at Seth and pushed him away, playfully. He tried to grab my waist, tickling me teasingly. I pulled away though, and turned to face him.

"Enough Seth, where's Jake and Leah?"

Seth pointed to the house as a little blonde in a pair of skimpy shorts sidled up to him, grabbing his arm and whining and pulled him in the direction of a bunch of people gathered around a fire pit, big coolers with what I assumed had beer in them were also scattered and Seth just shrugged his shoulders at me and walked away.

"Bella, catch!"

I turned around and quickly caught the beer that was thrown in my direction from the porch. Jake smiled at me and waved me up onto the porch.

"Good catch Bells, I really didn't think you were gonna catch that. Right after I did it I started looking for my keys because I figured I'd be taking you to the emergency room."

"Wow, thanks for all your faith in me."

He laughed and put his arm around my shoulders, leading me toward the door as I popped the top on my Bud Light can.

"So how're things with you and your Army Brat?"

"Shut up, he's not even in the Army. It's the Air Force, and he's fine. Busy, but fine."

"How was your trip out there?"

"Fruitful, I got two new donors."

"You know that's not what I meant. I wanna know if you and your man got it on while you were there…or if I have a chance."

"What?"

"Just kidding, just kidding. Nah, I just wanna know if he treated you right."

"Oh yeah, better than ever. He took me out to meet his friends and to tour the base and everything. He also bought me these gorgeous vintage diamond earrings that I love, not wearing them though…you never know what I'll lose at these parties."

Jake laughed and told me that I should go check out the kitchen, Leah had actually been cooking for a long time and that the food was actually good. I turned the corner as Jake went to go meet more people that were coming in. I thought I was alone as I picked up a hot wing and began nibbling on it.

"You're gonna get that all over your little tight outfit."

I turned around, knowing that voice. Embry Call.

"Um, Em…hey how's it going?"

"Been missing you, but other than that, not too much."

"Missing me, huh?"

I could feel the adrenaline from being around Embry start coursing through my veins. Sure, I had made a promise to myself that I was going to stay away from him; I had made the promise for my relationship. I loved Edward, but being around Embry made me feel so great, it made me feel wild and carefree.

"Yeah, every night. Sometimes, I think I get off on the pain of missing you."

I shivered at the thought of Embry getting off to any thoughts of me at all. A lot of girls would find that nasty or whatever, but I found it hot and intriguing.

"Getting off…to me."

"Well…that wasn't exactly how I said it, but yes, getting off to you."

I should've been thinking of Edward when Embry pushed me softly up against the fake wooden paneling of the farm house. I should've pushed him away when his lips bushed up against my collar bone, and then my ear as he whispered how sexy I looked and how bad he wanted me. I should've screamed for Jake, pulled one of those huge random guys from the doorway to get Embry off of me, something to protect what I had with Edward…but I let the silent assault on my neck continue…and I even began enjoying it. Suddenly, Edward's face came to the front of my mind and I pushed Embry away, just as his lips headed for my mouth.

"What the hell's going on, Bella?"

"I don't know Embry, what is this? You know I'm with Edward, but yet you keep pursuing me."

"Bella…you've never given me a reason to not pursue you. You talk to me whenever I come to see you, you hang out with me, you text me…I just always thought you secretly wanted me. I just don't get it."

"I'm weak! Don't you get it Embry! I turn to you, because you're here! But I don't want to cheat on Edward anymore. I only want to be with him, and I want to be able to give my full heart to him. Until I stop this little thing with you, then I'll never be the girlfriend Edward needs. I don't even know what I'm doing here…I don't belong with any of you anymore."

Embry grabbed her wrists from where they had shoved his chest, and pinned them above her head as he roughly shoved her up against the wall. No one was in the kitchen to witness it, so Embry continued looking at her with an angry glare in his eye.

"I fucking know that you care about me. Don't say that you don't. You aren't weak; you're just as strong as you want to be. I mean, running away to Texas for a weekend, now that was weak…but you aren't a weak person. And you'll never be the girlfriend for Edward, you're too good for him, don't let him make you think that you don't fit in with us. Bella, you belong here. He belongs there. It's just that easy."

I tried to pull my arms away from him, but he held fast, bringing his face close to mine. I turned away from him, he pulled back, his face twisted in disgust.

"Whatever Bella, when you know what's good for you, then we'll talk. But I'm not waiting forever. You're worth a lot Swan, but not that much."

He practically threw my wrists down and punched the swinging door out of the kitchen, going out to the living room. I sank down on the ground, rubbing my wrists as bright angry finger prints rose all over them. Burning tears fell down my cheeks and even though I wanted to rub them away, I just couldn't move, I pulled my knees up and pressed my forehead to them…I couldn't believe I had just let Embry mess with my head again. Why did he think he was so much better than Edward? Edward was doing so much more, he was going places. Could Embry be jealous? I guess so…guys and their stupid pride.

"Oh my God, Bella, are you okay? What happened?"

Concern laced Leah's voice as she knelt down on the floor beside me, pulling me close to her, smoothing my hair with her hands.

"Em…Em…Embry…"

I held my wrists up to her, and she touched them lightly.

"Embry did this to you?"

I nodded, tears still falling from my eyes.

"Fuck him! Let me get Jake to take you home, I'll follow you and bring him back."

"Nnnn….no…I don't wanna go home…puh…please take me to Edward's."

Jake came in and immediately started in and Leah took a few minutes to catch him up to speed.

"That jackass, I'll fix him later. Let's get you to Mrs. Esme; she'll take good care of you."

He pulled me up into his arms, gathering me up next to his warm chest. I felt safe for the first time since I had left Edward's arm at the airport.

(EPOV)  
"I'm not even sure what I'm supposed to be calling you about, Mom. Grandpa just called my commanding officer and my officer told me that I needed to call you right away. Is everyone okay at home?"

"Oh, Edward…I don't know exactly. Bella's here, and apparently she got into a bit of a fight with a mister Embry Call at one of her friend Jacob's parties and things got out of hand and she asked to be brought here instead of home. I've gotten her calmed down and now she's asleep in your bed."

I internally groaned. I did not want to have to request leave just to come home and take care of that punk, it was silly and I should be spending my time doing my work instead of cleaning up things around the house.

"Mom, I don't really have time for this. I have a security detail in like ten minutes that I have to attend to. And I don't care how many times Grandpa calls, I'm not going to use him to get out of the work I signed up for. I love Bella, but I don't have time to deal with all that."

Mom rambled on for a few more minutes about how precious Bella was, and I knew that mom wanted me to do everything in my power to make this thing between Bella and I work. I honestly wanted it to work to, but this wasn't going to be the type of relationship where Bella could come see me every weekend, or even once a month. There might even be times where she couldn't talk to me for months at a time…and I frankly couldn't see how she would be able to handle that. Only time would tell, and right now…my patience was running thin. I let my mother go, regrettably since I hadn't heard her voice in too long, and I rethought my decision from earlier. Yes, my decision would still stand. I would handle it all tomorrow.


	14. You Just Left Me Undone

**A/N: Sorry guys! Don't hate me! This chapter was so difficult to write, because I was trying to find out how to express the things that are happening in my actual life onto a Word file. It sure isn't easy. And I know when "someone" leaves this story it's odd and kinda awkward because he was playing an important role, but that's how it happened in real life. One day I was friends with "someone" and then I wasn't. So, take it, hate me, love me. Whatever you need to do. But know that I'm trying to please you! Tell me how you really feel! =) **

**Also! There's a veryyyyy good lemon towards the very end, don't go scrolling down now, be patient, lovelies! But I'm forwarning you! =) **

**You Just Left Me Undone**

(BPOV)

The sunlight filtered through the window at the very top of the wall in Edward's room, waking me up from my very deep sleep. I rubbed my eyes, letting them adjust to my surroundings, and then I checked my phone to see if I had any messages.

Edward had emailed me, which confused me, but I opened it on my Blackberry Torch and gasped.

To:

From:

My Bella,

I'm not sure how to say these words to you; I'm not sure how to break your heart…however, I feel as if this relationship needs a bit of a break. We need time to mature apart from each other, mostly I feel as if you need time to grow as a person, because as we are now you feel the need to constantly lean on me. I'm not saying we're through, because I love you more than life itself, but like I said, we need some time off. I do love you, no matter what. That ring on your finger, it means forever. I'll be home in September, we will talk then.

-Edward

I choked tears back as I pulled on my blue jeans and my white lacy tank top, my vest was thrown over my arm and I gathered my boots in my arms, opting to take a pair of flip flops that I had left in E's living room area. I threw my hair up in a ponytail as I opened the door to the upstairs, knowing that my red-rimmed eyes would raise some eyebrows, but at that point…I honestly couldn't care.

"Bella dear, it's good to see you this morning; I was just about to make some omelets for brunch…Bella, are you alright dear?"

Mrs. Esme was standing at the stove with her bright yellow apron on over a pretty powder-blue housedress. Concern was in her eyes as she walked to me, opening her arms.

"Mrs. Esme…I just…I don't understand what I've done to him. Did I depend on him too much? Was I too in love with him?"

She just held me like only a mother-figure could do, until I composed myself enough to gather my things and take myself to my truck.

As soon as I arrived at my home, I poured myself into my bed, where I stayed for the remainder of weekend.

9-13-10

(BPOV)

My phone rang and rang over and over, a basic cell tone. I reached for it out of my bag.

I had been sitting on the back of my truck watching the flood gates at the dam, open and shut, open and shut, open and shut. Just like the breaths that I was forced to take. It has been only a few weeks since Edward basically told me I needed to mature, so that's what I've been attempting to do. This whole thing, I've been trying to do whatever I could to spend time with myself, trying to figure myself out. Jacob had been coming around a lot. He noticed that I'd been by myself at the park behind his house a couple of times, and he would come and just sit with me. It was nice to have someone to kind of, bring me some sunshine when autumn was starting to fall in place.

"Hello?"

"Bella! Guess what just happened to me!"

"Tori…um, I have no idea. Tell me?"

"Jazz just asked me to marry him! We're engaged! "

After talking for a few more minutes, I hung up and drew my knees up to my chest. Tori was only a year older than me. Jazz was young too, only twenty. Edward and I should be the first ones to have taken that step. I looked down at my hand where his ring no longer sat. I had a slight tan line from wearing it for the majority of the summer. I had left every part of me that had anything to do with Edward on his bed, my heart was breaking and I just wanted to heal it.

School had started and I was enjoying my senior year as much I could, I wasn't quite used to being around guys my age, major horn-dogs, always looking for that next conquest. But my friend Jacob was there for me, constantly. He was watching over me, he cared for me, unlike anyone had ever cared for me before. Embry was no longer even a glimmer in my mind, Jacob made me forget him, and there he went, vanishing just like that. It was so easy to tune out his texts and phone calls when Jacob was there with me, hiding my phone and showing me music videos and taking me for rides in his amazing black Camaro. I spent my Fridays going to his game; he played for our team, sporting his red and black proudly, the number four on his front and back was the saving grace to our team. I cried at our losses and rejoiced with him at our wins. He was my best friend, my brother…or so I thought.

9-17-10

Our senior night passed by in a blur. The boys and girls that had been a part of my life for the past thirteen years of my life, they stepped out on the field and accepted their awards and I was so proud to know and love each and every one of them. After we demolished Horseshoe Bend 48-14 my friends gathered on the field for a photo session by all of the moms, Jacob picked me up and swung me around smiling like I'd only ever seen him smile, it was contagious, electrifying even.

"Bella, iHop after I shower, you want to?"

I couldn't say no, but Renee' and Charlie weren't excited about it giving me a curfew of 12:30. I offered to drive ahead with my friend Jane to hold the football players reservations (A/N: On Friday nights in Oxford, AL, you really do have to send people ahead to hold tables for you in our iHop. Seriously.) Her curfew was even earlier than mine, at twelve, so I knew I was going to have to hurry back to get her home in time.

We sat and waited on the team to get there, but even with their mad driving skills, they didn't arrive until about 11:15. We said goodbye to the boys and Jane spent a few minutes talking to her friend Mike. Jake led me outside, walking me to my truck. It was rather chilly for a September night and I only had on a light t-shirt, he pulled me up close to him and asked how my thing with Edward was going.

"It isn't. He hasn't contacted me since. I can't even bring myself to visit his family anymore, which hurts the most because I loved them more than anything. But it's okay…I'm just trying to put one foot in front of the other, you know, trying to see what's the best for me."

"Well maybe…just possibly…the thing that is the best for you is right in front of you."

He held my waist tightly with one hand, and used his other to move my chin up to look him in the eyes.

"Right in front of me?" I asked, confusion flooding my voice.

"Sure, I mean literally…right in front of you."

"Jake…I'm not even sure where this is coming from? I just need some…time."

Jane walked out the door of the establishment and I gave Jacob a quick hug and walked away from him, heart heavy, not sure what move to make next.

9-18-10/9-22-10

(EPOV)

I picked up my phone three times, each time tossing it back to my bed, pacing around my small dorm, stepping over piles of Ben's shit, not even really thinking.

I was going to be coming home in just a few days and I needed to talk to Bella. I knew that I hadn't been fair to her before, I had been very selfish in how I had treated her. She hadn't been the immature one; I had been the one that couldn't handle it, the one that had walked away from her after making her so many promises. I had ignored her, told my family not to talk to her, although I was pretty sure Tori ignored me and told her about the engagement…which I secretly hoped would make her miss me even more.

"Dude, just fucking call her already. I'm tired of you kicking my shit every time you walk past my bed."

Okay, so I call her. That's what I do now. She's going to forgive me…even though I don't deserve it…right?

"Hey, Edward is this really you?"

"Yeah Bells, it's me…I just need to apologize. I was way in the wrong with how I treated you earlier. You made me a really happy guy…I just need to talk to you about all this."

"Um, yeah E, we can talk…when are you going to be home next?"

"Actually…about that. I'm coming home…tomorrow."

"Sudden isn't it? Is that why you decided to call me up? You need some ass or something?"

"No, Bella…no. I'm not calling you for that…this isn't like that. This is something about the girl I loved, something about spending time with you to make up for the way I've hurt you. That's what this is all about. Not about a booty call in advance."

"I've moved on Edward. Simple as that."

And just like that she hung up on me, leaving me with nothing but cold silence. That night I let the tears fall and even Ben didn't poke fun at me. He knew I was hurting. I knew I was hurting. It was an awful last night at Lackland.

(BPOV)

As I pulled on red flannel and my favorite pair of faded broken-ins I thought about how crazy Edward was to think that it was going to be that easy to get me back. But then again, I couldn't believe that I had told him I had moved on. I wanted him back. It actually felt nice to hear his voice, and I really had no doubt that if we talked face to face while he was home then we would be back in each other's arms. Until then, I needed to deal with this Jacob thing, and my plan for that was to pretend like the whole iHop thing never even happened.

Later that day, Jake and I were sitting in our 4th period anatomy class and he pops up.

"Bella, let's go get my pictures from Mrs. Shauna! I still haven't picked them up."

We made a grand escape, riding to Cragford in the Camaro, to the photographer that had done both of our senior portraits.

Mrs. Shauna welcomed us both with hugs and smiles, not used to seeing us together. She took us back to a back room in her office and showed us Jake's slideshow, which was amazing. My best friend was so photogenic.

We rode around Ashland until he had football practice and then we made plans to add three of our other friends to the mix and hang out later at his house.

The plan was to meet at the Shell station, Alec, Mike, Jane, myself, and Jake and then we'd go out to McDonald's and then back to Jake's to watch a movie together. But after we'd finished eating, our lovely teacher called and asked us to help with t-shirts that we'd sold for our football team, so we ended up not going to Jake's and helping at school.

As I stared at Jake as he folded and sorted I realized that yeah, I would always care about Jacob…but not in the same way that I cared about Edward. He was my hero, my main man, the guy I would always love. I would accept his apology if he offered it again when he came home. I needed him in my life. Jake would always be there as my friend, always.

(EPOV)  
I would try again. I told myself this again and again as I drove back home. Barfield was a far cry from San Antonio, but I didn't mind if it meant being home with Emmett and Jasper and even Tori. My mom's home cooking and dad's sage advice was just what I needed.

I texted Bella and let her know that I loved her, just a basic text. She sent me a smile back, so I'm guessing that was a good thing.

I walked into the church looking around; there was no one to be found in the entryway. The doors were open, and I saw Charlotte, the lady we had bought our home and farm from, she was surrounded by all of her children. And then I saw Bella. She was wearing a pretty blue dress with a grey top and a black belted thing, holding Peter and Char's daughter Chelsea. She looked up, her big brown eyes meeting mine, and she practically tossed the little girl aside. Esme was standing there talking to Char and I almost ran her over. She ran up to me and threw her arms around me, it felt like a movie. I'd never been as moved in my life as I was that particular second. I was excited to tell her that I was moving on five hours away from home, to Kessler Air force Base in Mississippi.

"Edward, I know that I told you I'd moved on…but we both know I was lying. I've been hurting a lot, but I think I know now what I want. It's you. It's always been you. It'll always be you."

We spent the rest of the night in the church parking lot, discussing the new Mustang that I was planning on buying while I was home, and my new move to Kessler. It was a great night, I'd never seen B laugh more in my life, seen her smile more, seen her so happy.

I took her home and walked her up the front porch steps, a huge harvest moon bathing the surrounding fields with the white moonlight. Her eyes glimmered and I was so happy just to be holding her hand.

"Bella…I just want you to know. This is more than you think it is. I go to Mississippi on the 27th, and I just want you to know, you're in charge of all of this. This is all you. You pick what we do, how we spend our time. I want to make you happy. This is going to be the turning point of our relationship, I promise you, my beautiful."

(BPOV)

The next few days were spent just hanging out. He came over and watched The Notebook with me, he took me out to a local BBQ restaurant, and we went to his grandmothers to eat with his family. It was just how I wanted a real relationship with him to be. We had let the physical aspect of our relationship take over our entire relationship and it seemed like all we did was touch and kiss and that was okay but I wanted more depth I guess. And Edward was more than fulfilling that for me now. We talked, had long walks on my daddy's farm, and planned our future.

We went to the car lot to pick out Edward's new car…

"Bella, I've had white…I just want something different."

"If you want something different, get something better. Let's skip this Ford lot and go buy a Camaro!"

Okay, maybe I was partial to Camaros because Jake had a beautiful black one and I loved to ride in it, I felt special, like all the girls were staring at me. And I also loved those cars because they were Chevy brand, which was what my daddy chose to drive all of his life, and what my truck was.

"Naw babe, daddy's a Ford man. I think I like this silver one, let's go look at that."

I followed him and this random old dude that kept peeking at me as Edward looked at the car. I immediately regretted what I was wearing. It was this cute little white dress with thin light blue stripes on it. The top showed my boobs a little…okay a lot, and it showed a lot of leg and a lot of back. I was wearing a little blue jean jacket over it and pair of white leather flip flops.

The gray haired man, with his tacky black suit and loud blue tie kept looking at me with a crazy look in his eyes. His teeth were just a little too white and his hair had just a little too much gel in it. I sidled up a little closer to Edward, held his hand a little tighter as the guy suggested Edward take the car for a test drive.

"Yeah man, I'd love to! B, get in the car!"

Edward and I jumped in the car, this one being a 2009 silver Mustang GT.

He drove a little too fast down some back road in Heflin where the car lot was. Although I should've been scared, I wasn't, just exhilarated.

"B…baby…I just don't know what to do anymore."

We were pulled over back at the car lot; he was staring at the keys that he held in his hand as he leaned against the car that he had decided to purchase.

"What do you mean…?"

I looked at my hands and then stared out in to traffic. I didn't want Edward to start rethinking what he'd chosen now, not after I had decided to give him a second chance and we'd been working so hard to restore our relationship, and here I was, thinking we were getting closer than ever.

"Bella…I don't know that I'm doing right by you. I just want what's best for you, but I feel like me getting up and leaving you without any way to be with me…it's just not fair. And I mean, yes, now I can come home about a weekend a month, and we don't have to worry about me going on secretive missions, but my field could still be torturous for you since I could very well be gone for weeks, maybe months at a time.

I breathed in deeply as I moved toward him, taking his hand in my own and placing a kiss on it. I had to think carefully of how to address him, so that I would make him understand.

"Edward, you could be away for a year or however long you need to be away, and I would stand here and wait. But before you say anything about me not needing to wait, I really think that my form of waiting is not what you would expect.

I have so many things to do while you're away. My life isn't going to stop just because I don't have you right beside me. College applications and my friends are totally going to help me take care of missing you. I promise I'll be okay. And when you come home and be with me, I'll be here, ready for you. Because I love you, more than you know."

9-23-10/9-27-10

(BPOV)

I woke up the next morning ready to take on the day. Edward was going to visit some of his friends from college and I had to start preparing for one of the biggest three consecutive nights of my senior year.

There's this huge tradition in my school of a rivalry with our other county school. It's almost to the point where it aches me to wear any shade of blue (although I do from time to time) and we pretty much hate anyone from that side of town.

My team, the Lineville Aggies, was trying to recover from a seven year losing streak. Our rivals, the Ashland Panthers, thought they were unbeatable. This year we had the team that was the envy of everyone in our area and we knew just how good we really were. This was the 100 year celebration of the event, the acclaimed Clay Bowl. (A/N: Guys, this is a real thing, we were the #2 rivalry in the nation and #1 in the southeast, in the past few years. Very cool, Google it.)

I went to school, mostly texting Edward the entire day, in between talking football with the boys and getting so excited over the entire game that was going to take place the next day. We were having an Aggie Walk, where the entire community and school gathered to watch the band, football team, cheerleaders, and also people from the past one hundred years of Lineville High, walk through the town with the fire engines and other floats. Afterwards, everyone gathered at our gymnasium and we had a black out, which is basically a huge pep rally with the lights off and everyone was wearing glow in the dark stuff.

Edward called me as soon as I got home, and as hard as I tried, I couldn't keep my eyes open. I fell asleep listening to his velvet voice telling me that he couldn't come to the game the next evening because he had to go to a training seminar at the local army base.

I wish I could say the light streaming gently through my windows or Edward's velvety smooth voice woke me up, but it was only the ringtone Fly Like a G6 by the Far East Movement. I hit my phones touch screen, silencing the screaming alarm, until I realized that today was Clay Bowl day. I jumped up, smiling. Turning on my music, Remember the Name blasting through the speakers that were attached to my iPod dock. I ran my straightener through my hair and sat at my vanity and did my makeup while waiting on Edward to wake up and send me my good morning text message.

_Hey beautiful, I hope you have an amazing day. Tell the guys good luck tonight, especially Jake._

I texted him back with a smile on my face. He made me spin around and around.

_Thank you baby, I'll text you this afternoon and let you know how everything's going. =)_

I slid on this really pretty red cotton dress with a lacey hemline and cap sleeves and my favorite black sandals that fastened around my ankle. After adding several long black chains and a black bow to keep my bangs out of my face, I was ready to go to school.

Later that evening, I was preparing for the game. I had on my t-shirt that our school had sold for the event and some really cute black shorty shorts from Old Navy and the same black sandals. Jake had told me to watch out for him tonight, that he was going to be on fire, and I believed him. All of the boys had been on edge, in the best kind of way, bouncing off the walls, ready to tear up some Panther ass.

I found my seat next to Alice, Adam, and Rose in the Aggie Pit and settled in to watch the game with the rest of the thousands of fans that had gathered from all over the southeast. I screamed, cheered, yelled, laughed, and my eyes even watered a little bit towards the end when I realized it was the last Clay Bowl of my senior year. But when we finished our beating, 41-6, everyone ran out on the field and I searched the field for Jacob when he came up behind me, wrapping his arms around my waist causing me to drop my bag and my sign onto the field. I spun around and he picked me up, kissing my forehead and laughing and screaming. We had overcome the greatest of odds. Everyone doubted that we would be able to pull off a victory, but somehow we did, and now it was time to get down and celebrate.

My phone was dying, but I didn't care. We went and rolled the town, which it was my first time ever. An entire high school career is a long time to go without winning a Clay Bowl. It felt like time stood still. I didn't think about Edward or the fact that it was eleven o'clock. I just thought about celebrating and taking pictures with my best friends from my senior class. There was so much toilet paper that it looked like it snowed.

Jake ran up to me, smiling, and excitedly grabbed my hand.

"Bells, a bunch of us are thinking about riding up to iHop and celebrating the win. What do you think about joining us?"

"Um, duh Jake, you drive my truck. Jessica can ride with us. She's been fighting with Seth anyway."

We went back to his house so that he could shower and change into fresh black mesh shorts and his special 100th celebration shirt that was also sold by our school. After that, he drove us to Oxford, blasting Travis Porter and Roscoe Dash so that we didn't have to listen to Jessica and Seth fight over the phone the entire time.

Once we arrived, everyone laughed and ordered and as we were waiting, headlights flashed against the wall through the big glass paned windows that faced the parking lot.

Seth's friend Troy had pulled up and Seth had gotten out of the truck looking quite drunk. Jessica stood up quickly, and I followed her so that she wouldn't be alone. We met them in the doorway.

Seth said, "Jess, get your ass out here right now."

She followed him out the door, with me close behind her to where we met Troy at his truck. Seth started yelling, we could tell he was visibly drunk and very angry. I asked Troy to do something with him and he told me to fuck off, that it wasn't his place to deal with Jess's boyfriend.

The line had been crossed apparently, because Seth had found out Jess wasn't just with me, she was with Jake also. I looked frantically through the window behind me to search out Jake's face, he nodded at me.

"Is that the mother-fucker? Is he the one you were with?" He pointed at Jake and curled his finger at him, beckoning him towards us. "You better hope that bitch brings it."

Seth grabbed Jessica's arm and pushed her against the truck and stumbled toward me just as Jake walked out the door with several of our guy friends from the football team.

"Get the hell away from her; I don't care what's going on. Bella didn't do anything."

Jake positioned himself in front of me, my friend Daniel pulled Jessica around behind him, and the rest of our friends were behind us.

Seth turned to Troy and said, "We may get our ass whopped, but all these niggas gonna bleed."

As soon as those words come forth from his mouth, the manager walked out the door, to stand beside Jacob, who he had bonded with because they both owned black Camaros, and told Seth and Troy that they needed to be leaving or he would have to call the cops.

The drama dissipated almost as quickly as it began, and soon we were back around all the tables that we had pushed together and smiling and laughing over what could've happened. I was in awe of the feeling of protection that I just had. It was so nice, and something I'd only felt with Edward before. It was good to know I could get it from other things.

(EPOV)

I worried like hell while Bella was out, and she only sent me a sleepy text from her friend Jake's phone around two thirty, letting me know she was home and about to go to sleep. I wanted her to come over and stay with me, it was my last night at home and I wanted to spend it with her…but there was nothing I could do, because she never answered my texts after she fell asleep. I kept telling myself I would have the entire next day with her…but somehow a million years with her still didn't sound like quite enough time.

(Still E's POV but the next day)

"Is everything packed, son?"

Mom was cleaning up my apartment area and helping me pack my bags.

"I think so…will you go check and see if I left that new pack of black socks that yall bought me in a Target bag on the kitchen table?"

"Oh! I washed those for you, let me run and get them."

I had a feeling she knew I needed a minute to call Bella, but she didn't quite want to say it, for fear that something was wrong with us again.

I picked up my phone and flipped through my contacts until I reached her pretty picture; one that I had asked her to take…beautiful and tan in a bright orange tank top that made her look wild and perfect. Love made my heart swell even as I just looked at her.

"Bella, hey baby. How you feeling this morning?"

"Ughhh, Edward you have no idea how I feel. It's like a joy hangover. But totally worth it, anyways, I'm doing a lot better now, I have coffee in my system and now I'm sitting out by the pool with a book."

"When can I come pick you up?"

"Huh, what are you talking about?"

"Um…I leave tonight baby. I wanted to take you somewhere…"

"Oh! Of course baby, I'm sorry. In all the excitement I kind of forgot about you leaving. What shall I wear and what time do I need to be ready?"

Okay…that certainly wasn't what I was expecting…but I'll work with what I've been given.

"Let's see, it's like eleven…so can you be ready in thirty minutes. Just wear shorts and a t-shirt and some tennis shoes. Is that okay?"

She agreed and I went to finish up my stuff as quickly as I could so that I could have optimum time with her. She was once again letting our relationship go, and there was nothing I could do but keep trying. I needed her to need me as much as I needed her. I wanted her to want me. And no, I don't watch 10 Things I Hate About You….haha.

(BPOV)

I felt like such a bitch. What kind of girlfriend forgets when her Airman is going back to base? I had never been angrier with myself. I decided right then and there that I would throw myself into our final date so that he would know despite the fact that I had slipped up time and time again, that I did love him and that I was willing to try to make this thing stick.

I threw my book and the towel I'd been laying on by the pool onto my bed and raked my brush through my hair, trying to decide what I was going to wear. Edward had said very casual, so I pulled my hair around and braided it quickly, leaving the tail across my shoulder. I pulled on my favorite pair of Nike track shorts that were black with red trim and my favorite white Lineville t-shirt that we sold the night of Clay Bowl (Front: You call that domination? Back: We call that BEAST MODE! 41-6). My white shox went onto my feet after my black ankle socks.

Even as I applied a little foundation with sunscreen in it and a light dusting of loose powder and chap stick, I couldn't help but worry about Edward being upset for me getting distracted from our relationship. Surely he knew that I just needed to be my age. But I had told him that I was ready for a relationship like ours, so if it failed this time…it certainly would be my fault.

I had no more time to think. As soon as I switched my iPod dock off, I heard his heavy knock on my front door.

BPOV

Edward pulled the bandana away from my eyes that had been there for the last thirty minutes. He had held my hand in the car and played my favorite artists like Usher and Chris Brown, even though they weren't exactly his type. I had felt the incline as we were driving the last fifteen minutes, and now I understood.

We climbed out and I immediately realized where we were. My surroundings weren't the only thing that told me we were at Bald Rock on Mount Cheaha; the sign also boasted that this was the highest point in the state of Alabama. I turned and my lips met Edward's.

It was perfect weather for walking out to the edge of Bald Rock, autumn, when all the leaves were turning and the air was still warm. E took my hand in his larger one and we smiled at each other and began the short walk down the boardwalk that had been built in the middle of the woods that led to the large rock that looked out onto four counties at one time.

(EPOV)

My Bella was beautiful as the daylight washed over her, the rays of sunlight glinting off of her shiny hair that she had braided over her shoulder. We climbed down off the boardwalk and climbed around on the rocks, eventually settling for a spot that looked much like an actual bench. She leaned her sweet little head against my hard shoulder and I put my arm around her, pulling her close to me. She smelled sweet, almost painfully sweet. I knew her smell wasn't actually that strong, I also knew that my acute senses caused everything like that to be magnified, but in this case I didn't care. I just wanted to be able to remember her smell.

We talked of me leaving, and how she had to go to a senior dinner tonight and wouldn't be able to see me off. I made a promise to stay with her while she got ready and to stay with her to send her off with Jacob. That made me want to throw up in my mouth, knowing he would get to keep her, to take her places while I was off doing other things for us, for my country….and most selfishly, for myself.

I gave a young woman that was nearby my camera so we could document the moment, and she took several pictures of us. I gave her a ten for her trouble and we went back to the car, our hearts heavy. I reassured her that I would be able to come home at least one weekend a month, since I was so close, but even to myself I worried whether that would be enough. However, I made myself a promise that I would no longer doubt myself or my relationship with Bella. I would trust her and I would trust in us and I would work tirelessly to make this work between us. I loved her.

(BPOV)

I laid my dress out carefully beside Edward, taking in his huge form where he was laying, stretched out across my bed.

"Don't you dare roll over, because I don't have time to steam this dress again."

He looked up at me with a lopsided grin and then moved his body slightly, as if to tease me and then laid back down flat, watching me as I moved about my room.

I sprayed another coat of hairspray on my hair that was halfway pulled up with curls falling around my shoulders. My makeup was very different from what I normally wore, which was very basic. Tonight my eyes would be dark, with smoldering gray shadow and loads of dark eyeliner and mascara and my lips were a very shocking shade of bright red. They popped against my tan skin and the darkness in my eyes.

I adjusted my iPod dock to play I Like It, by Enrique Iglesias and I began dancing around my room. E was watching me intently, as my body swayed to the music. Sure, you could see my tan lines because I was sporting a black strapless pushup bra, but what did that matter when I knew Edward was checking out my ass. I went over to the bed, leaned down in an attempt to tease him but he grabbed my thigh and pulled me up onto the bed, astride him.

My breath was husky as I leaned down, my curls covering our faces like a silk curtain. Our lips crushed together and I could feel him almost harden immediately as I rubbed into him. I kissed him again as I moved my hips so that I could slide his shorts and boxers down, freeing "Little-Big Edward" or whatever nickname he felt like calling his junk at that moment. He mimicked my movements by pulling my thong down and tossing it to the floor.

My parents were in the living room which shared a wall with my bedroom, so we carefully and quietly slid together and laid very still together, simply enjoying being that close. He began using his hands to move me up and down, in an excruciatingly slow fashion.

"Edward…God…oh my God."

He placed his hand over my mouth, where I took one of his fingers and began sucking, licking, and gently biting it. That caused him to go over the edge. He took a few more strokes and then I came undone, biting a little harder than I probably should have.

I lay on top of him, looking into his eyes, until suddenly his soft grip on my thighs became urgent. I jumped at the change in him.

"What's wrong?"

"Clock, look at it. Shit, Jake will be here in any second."

I jumped up, looking in the mirror. Luckily my hair was still in very good shape and after I dusted a little more powder on my face and applied a bit of lip gloss I looked as good as new.

Edward held up my dress, wrinkle free since he had been careful to keep me still during our sexcapade. I took it from him and stepped into it, he was very helpful, zipping the back up and then planting sweet kisses on my shoulders as he made sure my straps were straight.

He bent down and I watched him pick my thong up from the floor. He held it out to me. I shook my head no.

"No?"

"Isn't that a sexy thing to do, no panties?"

"When you're going out with someone who isn't your boyfriend…"

"Good point." I offered him my broadest smile, taking the underwear that barely counted as underwear and slipped them on up under my pretty red silk dress and then I adjusted the straps again, making sure the roses that were up my right shoulder were all straight.

Mom called me from the kitchen and I knew Jacob was there. E helped me find both of my black peep toe heels and as soon as I put them on, he pressed me up against my bedroom door.

His fingers found me under my skirt, his whispering voice was almost harsh.

"This is mine. No one, not even Jake can make you feel the way I do. I love you, Bella."

He flicked me softly where no one else had ever dared to, and I shivered with want, with need. I looked at the clock once more. The banquet didn't start for another hour. Jake just wanted to get there early to hang out with all his boys. I gave Edward the "shush" symbol with my finger and opened the door.

"Mom, tell Jake I need fifteen minutes! Something happened to my hair and I'm re-curling part of it!"

She yelled back, "Okay baby, hurry! You don't want to be late!"

Edward shut the door behind me quietly, using the same hand to roughly slide my thong to the side and pushed himself into me once more. This time he was needier, this was more so about him than it had been before. As soon as he was inside, he picked me up, being very careful with my dress, and sat me on my dresser, pressing my back up against the chilly mirror. I held onto the side of the dresser with my hands, white knuckled as he took out his aggressions on my body. I opened my mouth to cry out, this had never felt this way before, and I never thought something that hurt could feel so good. He covered my mouth with his and all I could feel was his tongue battling with mine. Suddenly he twitched hard and I clamped around him and then it was all over. He grabbed the towel I had used to dry my hair with and cleaned me up quickly as I reached down to my underwear drawer to grab another skin-colored thong to replace the one he had practically torn off of me.

He smiled sheepishly at me.

"Was that selfish of me?"

I shook my head no at him, hopping down slowly from the dresser with his help, my legs wobbling in my heels as I aimed myself for the door. I felt like I was bow-legged. This was bad, bad, bad. I did my best to straighten myself as I faced Jake and my parents.

My mom took way too many pictures, lots of me and Jake, some of just Jake, some of just me, and some of Edward and I. Edward was even nice enough to snap some of me and my sisters, me and my parents, and me and my nephew. Jake even took a whole family picture, including and not including Edward. I looked out of the door as we were getting ready to leave, Edward's silver Mustang sat in front of Jacob's black Camaro. Edward and Jake both walked to the Camaro. Edward kissed me softly and then I sat, all the while hearing my mom click away on her camera. Jake shook E's hand as if to say "I'll take care of her, bro" and then he kissed my hand that I offered him and then he shut me inside the car.

E got into his car and pulled out of my driveway behind Jake and I. I turned and watched him drive behind us till we reached the road he had to turn on to go to his house to gather his bags and say goodbye to his family. A sob caught in my throat as I turned, not being able to see him anymore. Jake took my hand and I knew I would be okay.

* * *

**A/N: Okay guys, so Embry mysteriously leaves. I know, it's weird. But that's how real life works. Who knows, he may come back. Anyways, I hope you enjoyed it! The next chapter will probably fast forward to Thanksgiving and then Christmas so that I can catch back up with my real life. Thanks so much for reading! =) **


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